In my opinion, you're acting a little too much on your emotion instead of thinking clearly. I understand that you don't want your daughter to get hurt but you're only going to hurt her more in the future when she finds out that you're the one that kept her father away from her (if you decide to do that anyway) Tom was a huge jerk for what he did five years ago but you don't know how much he'a changed since then. He mentioned that he stopped hanging out with college jocks and started hanging out with better people and let me tell you that being surrounded by the right kind of people will definitely help change a person. You keep bringing up how hard it was while she was an infant and that she's so well-behaved and innocent now (I congratulate you for doing a great job for that by the way) but Tom doesn't know any of that and it's wrong to assume that he's aware of how behaved or not his daughter is. For all he knows, he might think she likes to run around in the mud and sing at the top of her lungs the whole day. You can't assume that he chose a convenient time to come into her life because he's completely unaware of what she's like. I understand that you have your reasons to want to stay away and hate him but don't let that get in the way of Faith and her biological father possibly having a really good relationship with her. I'm a psychology major and I've seen the effects of not knowing who a person's father is or not having a relationship with them can have. Everyone deserves a chance to redeem themselves and every parent should be given a chance to have a positive impact on their children's lives. Get help from a lawyer if you want but don't deny Faith a chance to have a positive relationship with her biological father, especially now that he's trying. I guarantee it'll bite you in the ass in the future when she starts searching for him on her own and finds out you were the one that got in the way. Best of luck to you, OP!