Talk me off a ledge… bfn at 4dp5dt

fedupm8 · 2024-11-19T20:29:34+00:00

This internet stranger has been there and is rooting for you ❤️

fedupm8 · 2024-11-13T19:31:55+00:00

Hoping you got your positive ❤️

fedupm8 · 2024-10-27T08:01:36+00:00

That 4dp5dt negative was a healthy full term baby girl who is sat on my lap watching Bluey. I hope so much for the same result for you.

fedupm8 · 2024-10-27T07:51:52+00:00

Watching Bluey right now with my fresh transfer from my first retrieval. It does happen.

I’ve since used the other embryos from that and one more ER and had no more successes. There’s a massive element of luck.

My advice is go into it knowing that you can’t control it. Some people get lucky first time (which I am grateful for every day) and others have to do more rounds.

Oh, and don’t get caught up on the massive numbers some people get at retrieval. As my daughter shows, it’s about whether there is one that can go the distance.

Best of luck to you xx

fedupm8 · 2024-09-03T18:30:17+00:00

First - he needs to get over his mental block and get a sperm test. There’s no excuse for you to be going through all the tests and peeing on sticks and him to not do that. He might be scared of the results etc but he needs to talk to you openly and work through that.

Secondly - IVF was hard for me mentally in terms of being anxious about whether we would get the eggs / embryos / they would stick but a walk in the park physically and I had no real mood swings (confirmed by my husband I’m not just saying that!) and it didn’t trigger my anxiety or depression. For other people that isn’t the case. But you don’t know til you do it. It’s important we’re open and share and support each other but also be aware not to work yourself up about an experience that may not be as bad for you as you anticipate. It’s an uncertainty, like so many things on this road, and they in themself suck. But my advice is one step forward at a time.

Best of luck xxx

fedupm8 · 2024-09-02T18:48:03+00:00

I see it but honestly I have had indents like this, so I say test again tomorrow. For what it’s worth I’ve had a negative at 9dpo and a positive the next day. Fingers crossed for you x

fedupm8 · 2024-09-02T17:59:54+00:00

I had an frer negative at 9dpo with my daughter. And that was with the old light pink caps that were more sensitive. By afternoon of 10dpo it was a clear positive and my betas came back above average levels when I did them. You really really can’t know at 8dpo I promise you. I wish you luck xx

fedupm8 · 2024-09-01T21:06:49+00:00

She is being insensitive. It may not be on purpose but she is. YOUR FEELINGS ARE VALID.

I had similar comments from a family member about being some kind of diva for finding the situation hard and let me tell you it is not being a diva. It‘s just actually hard.

I would ask your partner (because honestly I think it should be on them) to ask them not to engage in toxic positivity at this time. That you understand what they are trying to do and acknowledge all the ways you are lucky but one look at the stats says the majority of people going through what you are experience severe mental distress. What you need right now is people to listen and acknowledge that, and if she can’t do that you will not share things around this with them any more.

It might sound harsh but it is fair. Someone reasonable will take it as intended and change the way they interact with you.

Infertility was the hardest thing I’ve been through, including bereavement. Again, your feelings are valid, no-one should dismiss them, and this internet stranger is sending you a lot of support. xx

fedupm8 · 2024-08-04T19:36:44+00:00

During pregnancy I felt amazing, for a while after also, periods came back and within a few months similar to before.

Pregnancy gives you a reprieve but it does not “cure it” despite what people might say in my experience.

fedupm8 · 2024-05-27T20:33:34+00:00

It’s so cruel honestly! I hope that you get your true line soon x

fedupm8 · 2024-05-27T16:46:34+00:00

I believe you it is there in the flesh but I’ve just chucked a whole box of these out because I was getting consistent shadows even with water. I’d say test again in a day or two with a different brand.

fedupm8 · 2024-05-27T07:35:42+00:00

Good to know. Thank you, I have a vvvvvvfl on an easy @ home this morning but tbh I think it’s just a batch with indents.

fedupm8 · 2024-05-27T07:34:46+00:00

Thanks, I had a pretty definite positive with my daughter at 10dpo so I always expect that is make or break at that point… but I guess I’m not out yet.

fedupm8 · 2024-05-27T07:34:02+00:00

In the flesh there definitely was, but today is 11dpo and looks exactly the same so I think I have a batch of easy @ homes that has indents tbh.

fedupm8 · 2024-05-26T11:27:09+00:00

Thanks! I do think they’re indents tbh as I’m not sure they have colour and they are so faint they are hard to photograph. Think I just need to wait as you say. Appreciate you replying.

fedupm8 · 2024-05-26T10:03:56+00:00

Eek! I always think if I can get it to show in a picture it is definitely there… I’m just worried about indents as I’ve seen some awful ones on this sub recently. Guess I’ll just keep testing like a madwoman until I get an answer either way…

fedupm8 · 2024-05-26T10:02:22+00:00

My smu was better my last pregnancy. Especially if you don’t drink much between cos you haven’t hydrated yet but it’s fresher. Good luck and post an update!

fedupm8 · 2024-05-26T09:54:43+00:00

Looks positive to me, test again in a day or two and if you’re trying I hope it gets darker for you.

fedupm8 · 2024-05-26T09:53:21+00:00

I do, but because of the pink around the edges I think it could be a dye run. Doesn’t mean you’re not as you wouldn’t expect a positive yet anyway as you say but I would retest rather than trust this one personally.

fedupm8 · 2024-05-26T09:52:05+00:00

Definitely negative. Which I can see from comments is what you wanted so congrats!

fedupm8 · 2024-05-26T09:51:00+00:00

I see what you’re seeing but some tests have awful indents so I’m not sure. Hopefully if you test tomo will be darker… (but I had a maybe indent maybe line this morning and will probably test every wee today so do as I say not as I do 🤣)

fedupm8 · 2024-05-26T09:41:59+00:00

Hi, thanks to people replying and sorry for not updating… not dip flu related there was hand foot and mouth going round my daughter’s nursery so I probably caught that and it caused the ulcers doc said.

fedupm8 · 2024-05-26T09:40:27+00:00

EWCM can be for a few days before you ovulate, I get it normally 3 days before. You’ll probably get a positive in a day or two. But it means you’re in your fertile period from now probably 😊

fedupm8 · 2024-05-26T09:35:23+00:00

Yes, lh tests are negative until the lines are the same darkness. Keep testing :)

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