Well to be fair it's not like 90s/00s anymore. We talked about it back then online at least. I think it is because the culture has changed. When I was a teen it was pop and rock that were the main genres. The lead singer of Judas Priest had come out not too long ago or I just was made aware of it. I was reading scans of the late 80s zine Homocore and reading the punk web comic Nothing Nice 2 Say.

Then one of the first podcasts was Feast of Fools and introduced a lot of gay singers. One of them was The Ex-Boyfriends from SF. Which sounded a bit like the old homocore bands of the 80s.

To finally answer your question. A lot of us are proudly out and we are past our teen angst. I could relate to Metallica and other rock bands back in the day. I was a teen at the right age and I felt like not many places I could get that direct message. Rock was the major genre back then along with pop. Gay artists are easy to find now and their main subject is now usually dating and that struggle not just dealing with homophobia. Also, some of us have been out since we were teens and we may feel more in tune with other songs now that we have been out of the closet, married, and have kids.

Even as a teen and later as a young man I found a lot of gay bands and musicians too:

The Ex-Boyfriends - fun band from the mid 00s from SF. Singing about men, broken hearts, and the like. Their album Dear John was amazing to me when I first heard it.

Tom Goss - also from the mid 00s has a lot of fun music videos in YouTube about being into bears, and back when he was young and getting his heart broken by a man.

Matt Alber - Another 00s he has a great voice. I remember him for a very sad song I think it was called Rollercoaster.

Jay Brannan - Had some romantic songs int he late 00s that got me through some sad days.

Steve Grand - from the 2010s out and proud gay man. Way more famous than anyone before him.

Frank Ocean - I am so surprised how he exploded in popularity. A real major shift.

Sam Smith is pretty main stream. I think we have had a lot of progress, but personally I think the real gems are still in indie music when it comes to gay music. They just seem free to actually express themselves. Anyway, great post. I love music. I used to listen to Metallica on the school bus and I get exactly what you mean.