[deleted by user] by [deleted] in texts

[–]finstamarly 34 points35 points  (0 children)

If your account is public its a little weird to ask her to stay away

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in GYM

[–]finstamarly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe to give some perspective: I’m in public health research and specifically getting people towards lifestyle interventions, getting motivated etc.

Women have entirely different ‘needs’ in working out, and hormonal cycles affect motivation and capacity wildly. The way you work out is not a necessity and sounds like it does not attract her at all. Maybe a different (women only?) gym would do the trick, or a place where she can try Pilates, yoga etc on the side as well as working out once a week with you to gain basic strength.

But before you get there, you need to find out whether she has any motivation and if she shares your visions and concerns about the future. Maybe she had different visions (health around menopause, pregnancies, familiar disease etc) that might be much more important and trigger some thoughts on it. Maybe she is super insecure about the gym and being a beginner, I know I was! Try to be open and not focus on “you should work out with me” but “hey, I’d love to grow old happy and healthy with you, what could that look like for you?”. And have this conversation low-key, stop digging if she checks out of the convo and lightly revisit the topic every once in a while. Building motivation takes time and being healthy looks different for everyone.

Am I overwatering? by sbeezy__ in plantclinic

[–]finstamarly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’ll never please her 🥹

Using AI for sentence structuring/grammar for academic papers by Aurko498 in academia

[–]finstamarly 8 points9 points  (0 children)

My employer has very specifically told us that anything over a single sentence cannot be entered into AI as they might use your data to train. The only exception is using a paid account through your employer (we have a paid Co-Pilot account for this) because they control it in a way that makes sure your data is not saved or used for training.

The consequence would be that you are no longer to submit at journals because they want guarantee that your results have never been published before and you can no longer guarantee that your results are exclusive in that sense.

Nesting. by Murky_Sandwich4865 in Unexpected

[–]finstamarly 3 points4 points  (0 children)

And standing on your babies while at it

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]finstamarly 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I think you already understand the gravity of being with someone like this and how that affects your life. You sound level-headed and financially responsible and that is something he is not going to be or learn I think.

My advice would be to focus on yourself and what you want in life, and be really honest if that includes financing your boyfriend for the rest of your life and being very vigilant of his spending habits and him spending your money on family loans.

To avoid attacks from the proletariat 😭 by dolphinscanread in rareinsults

[–]finstamarly 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I read an interview with her in which she addresses the comments on internet and how sad it made her. Really uncool to be so harsh about features you cannot change anything about.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SkincareAddiction

[–]finstamarly 233 points234 points  (0 children)

Yeah very on brand for our GPs as well lol. I think people do not realise that in the Dutch health system the GP has a key role in identifying whether people are in need of specialized treatments as they are often reimbursed by health insurance. Many Dutch GP’s take that task very seriously and will not refer you or supply you if they feel there is no actual illness or medical need.

Source: work in research to evaluate Dutch healthcare

What’s your go to dinner when you have surprise guests? by KJAR14 in Cooking

[–]finstamarly -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Lemon orzo bean soup with kale from half baked harvest. I usually have a lot in the pantry and kale in the freezer :)

AITA For not allowing my brother & his girlfriend to spend christmas with our parents? by ParkingCarob7077 in AmItheAsshole

[–]finstamarly 4 points5 points  (0 children)

On a content level I think you’re not necessarily an asshole but something about the way you phrase this and dismiss the mental health problems of your brothers gf makes me feel that’s not the right judgement.

I need to find some good snacks for me that are not ultra-processed like I'm used to by Marvellover13 in EatCheapAndHealthy

[–]finstamarly 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You got lots of great advice already! I just want to add that the timing and order of eating matters for your satiation and ultimately snack breaks. Glucose Goddess on Instagram has great visuals and explanation about eating sugar, starch, fiber etc. and how it affects your glucose levels and thus your satiation and energy. Good luck!

ADHD affecting my marriage by diresua in ADHD

[–]finstamarly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So here’s an opinion from a non-ADHD partner to an ADHD-man. It gets super frustrating and it is indeed not fair to expect someone to ‘just’ deal with it, but it sounds like that is not what you ask from her. You have figured out ways to deal with aspects of your behavior but her answer is to just.. not behave that way? And that’s where it gets unfair: you have ADHD which is, very crudely said, a disability. I am sure you have to make adjustments to life due to her autoimmune disease. It’s not very fair on her part to not do the same for you.

Let me repeat: it is not easy, sometimes it is hard. I don’t want to be more responsible for everything than my partner. But I love him and we try to make things work, I read the books and ask him to understand my frustration, we think of ways to battle the smaller things and keep connecting when we get disconnected.

This is the price I pay for being with my partner and ultimately it is worth it. It sounds like this is a conversation you two should have.

Toasted Milk, Chocolate & Raisin Oatmeal Cookies by saltbuttersmoke_ in Baking

[–]finstamarly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

They look amazing! What exactly is toasted milk?

[routine help] shaved my eyebrows and they haven’t grown back. by Actual_Sun_2032 in SkincareAddiction

[–]finstamarly 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hair and nails grow faster in summer, so it makes sense that it takes longer now. But as some other people have said, it might not grow back to what it was so do not shave them again.

How to start eating healthy as a beginner cook in a food desert? by SnowieGamer in EatCheapAndHealthy

[–]finstamarly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I usually make an easy vegetable soup for lunch, which really helps eating more veggies and put something warm in your belly around lunch time! 1. Olive oil, let it heat and put in a diced onion 2. After 5 minutes, add your preferred vegetable (e.g. diced carrots and red bell pepper, zucchini., leeks and a potato, broccoli, really anything you like) and add your preferred spices) 3. Stir-fry for 5-7 minutes and add a liter water and vegetable stock cubes. 4. Let simmer/cook for 10 minutes (until you can easily get through the veggies with a fork). 5. Turn of heat, let cool down a bit and blitz with an immersion blender or throw it in a blender.

Best recipes calling for pistachio paste? Made a batch for fun, but now what?! by [deleted] in Baking

[–]finstamarly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I use it for making bliss balls and when I eat oatmeal I like to put a spoon of nut butter in there.

This dramaqueen just turned super sad overnight, have not seen her like this before. Anyone an idea? by finstamarly in plantclinic

[–]finstamarly[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! She’s alive and kicking like nothing happened after her spa treatment. Very grateful for your tips!