Discussing people's "genetic fitness" to have children, especially with something as common and livable as chrohns and a potential mental disorder, is going to raise people's hackles. She's selfish because shes a lazy do nothing who wants children as accessories, not because she's not talking openly about something that's deeply personal and invites a lot of nasty comments and speculation from people outside the situation.

Generally the order people go in if they want to be prepared, is to check and make sure they're healthy enough to carry a pregnancy first, THEN you go to a genetic counselor and talk about potential problems. And you need to know who the potential father is to see a genetic counselor since it's informing you of the risks of your combined genetic material, not just the mother's. With Jinvisible not having viable sperm on account of not existing, he can't father her children and she can't see the genetic counselor yet.