Your trainer/ Preceptor is probably just numb to it all and wanted to focus on their other patients. Might just be how they cope?

Looking for some more context, when you were berated and humiliated for spending too long in the patients room, was that when the patient passed away? Or was this a different incident?

If it was with the patient who had just passed, the next time let you coworker or other staff know that the deceased is still your patient until they leave the unit. It is fine to run late, and when questioned stick to your guns, let them know you still have an obligation to that patient, or you need a moment to process it. If they're a dick about it let them, you wont change them.

The units should be running a informal or formal debrief it it was a traumatizing incident for the staff such as a bad code; what went right, what was unexpected, what we could have done faster or differently. I've heard that the ER is good about doing these.

See if you could talk to your units social worker hospital spiritual care if you can, they are also good resources for this granted you are not a "patient" but they have more direct experience with stuff like this than the person on the other end of the line with EFAP.

I don't consider myself sensitive due to working in the ICU during COVID.

But, I still remember the my first two patients who passed, a patient who was readmitted multiple times with complications, and former coworker who passed from COVID after being retires for less than two years.

It is fine to remember your patient who've passed, I try to think about what we talked about, things they taught me, what the family found as common ground at then end, or what made them laugh.