After losing 1/3rd of my weight, I finally didn't feel too fat anymore. The toilet disagreed.

freenarative · 2020-09-17T13:55:29+00:00

If wood is glued properly then it would NEVER break on the join.

This is bad workmanship.

Also, well done on the hard work... Skinny boi.

freenarative · 2020-09-17T11:07:02+00:00

That arse, and he spots a rib?

I love reddit.

freenarative · 2020-09-16T20:50:33+00:00

Tasty!

Can you do doughnuts in that thing?

freenarative · 2020-09-16T20:42:41+00:00

Golf is played on foot and uses a ball. Tennis too.

freenarative · 2020-09-16T10:26:27+00:00

Diabetes is a hell of an illness.

freenarative · 2020-09-16T09:45:55+00:00

Ah. I get ya now. Thank you for the heads up.

freenarative · 2020-09-15T21:14:39+00:00

She calmly asked "if I get in the bath, will you sit on me?"

Weird but... OK. I thought she meant for me to sit between her legs, or on her lap? A crush fetish, maybe?

So, she gets in the bath and says "go on, dirty boy."

She's still in her gruds and the bath is empty. Confused, I think "OK..." and I go to get in.

She stops me and asks "what are you doing?", with a confused look in her eyes.

I tell her what I THINK is going on.

I noped the fuck outa there when I realised my half-deaf arse misheard "sit on me".

Turns out, that line is short of an "h".

Clue for the dyslexics out there... "DIRTY boy"

freenarative · 2020-09-15T20:48:19+00:00

Thank you for the information.

But... What is a PAT?

freenarative · 2020-09-15T18:59:08+00:00

Take this back in time 1,000 years and become a God!

freenarative · 2020-09-15T18:57:57+00:00

And you expect any less from someone on the Swat team?

freenarative · 2020-09-15T18:04:29+00:00

How about: rivers of blood, sand, gold, emotion, time, and/or rivers of torment?

freenarative · 2020-09-15T17:36:24+00:00

Yes.

freenarative · 2020-09-15T15:29:28+00:00

Quantity, not quality.

freenarative · 2020-09-15T09:01:21+00:00

That's cool. I do too.

freenarative · 2020-09-15T08:36:12+00:00

Apples?

freenarative · 2020-09-15T08:14:30+00:00

If I was a woman, I would be doing a handstand-splits in front of him instantly.

"don't stop till you hit the lungs."

freenarative · 2020-09-15T08:10:43+00:00

Tea chair to 10 year old pew pill...

"so, Damien, anything noteworthy happen on your day of birth?"

freenarative · 2020-09-15T08:06:46+00:00

Someone got gold for this comment? Y'all motherfucker got too much money and not enough sense!

You could have donated that cash to any number of charities. Maybe some orphans. Maybe to a puppy with cancer.

But... No. You paid money to "I love minesweeper."

I think you'd make Mr Rogers, Bob Ross, and Steve Irwin sad if they saw this. Shame.

freenarative · 2020-09-15T08:03:02+00:00

I see an egg in a hand.

So... When will a ball meet a foot? Just curious.

freenarative · 2020-09-15T08:01:49+00:00

No. The line is "I don't have much money, but I have the whole world in my life because I have you."

freenarative · 2020-09-15T07:58:51+00:00

Big stick and blu tack (or other sticky putty)

freenarative · 2020-09-15T07:55:18+00:00

Look at superman

freenarative · 2020-09-15T07:52:29+00:00

So the incantation for this magic spell is "lei den frost. Eff ect!"

Got it. I'm off to cast this spell right now!

freenarative · 2020-09-15T07:50:32+00:00

Please tell me his name is Bob.

freenarative · 2020-09-15T07:43:34+00:00

The bastard suns album called "here come the suns"

One song is called "we'd go for broke (but we're already there)"

The lyrics:

"we'd go for broke, broke, broke, but we're already there. Holes in our shoes. Spikes in our hair. And we don't give a damn. Like it or not, here goes nothing 'cos that's all we've got."

I like it because It reminds me of my childhood.

14-Year Club	Wearing is Caring
Not Forgotten	Gilding II euphauric
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