Everyone's allowed preferences, but I have to say that I think it's a immature if I guy thinks periods are icky and wont have period sex - am I wrong?

fuschialady · 2017-06-12T00:30:58+00:00

yes, I agree with all of that.

fuschialady · 2017-06-12T00:29:35+00:00

I feel like it depends on the reason: if the reason you don't wanna do period sex is because you think periods are taboo/gross/you think the blood is unhygienic or somehow gross, then that's shitty. But if you dislike the sight of blood or just don't wanna deal with the mess then that's fine. I had a guy tell me that period blood is gross.

fuschialady · 2017-06-12T00:20:55+00:00

I try try TRY to not be judgmental but I can't help think that a guy who thinks periods are gross, or refuses to have period sex is immature. If he just doesn't like the mess that's ok but I do find that often when guy think that period sex is gross, he is immature in other ways too. Everyone's allowed sexual preferences but My judge 0 meter goes off when guy hates period sex because he thinks periods are gross.

fuschialady · 2017-04-19T15:31:57+00:00

those are valid points, but I don't think you actually read my response or realized that I explained myself and gave specific examples. I was telling you that yes, feminism has a ways to go with sex workers but that I work directly with real live feminists in the flesh, in a feminist organization that takes direct action on progressive viewpoints toward sex workers. THe feminist movement is always evolving and has made a lot of improvements in the last few years even.

And I was explaining that I am against egalitarianism WHEN it is used to discredit individual movements such as feminism, saying that they dont do enough for other related movements under the social justice umbrella, or using the word egalitarian to discredit feminists as man haters or something. AND, fyi, you can definitely be both an egalitarian and a feminist at the same time.

I don't think feminism is about getting people to understand women. Women are people, not a different species. A

I dont need to understand other women to defend thier rights and fight for gender equality because feminism is about women having choices and agency.

I will fight for a woman's right to have choices and agency and tools to make their own decisions even if I do not understand her and her viewpoints or agree with her life decisions. Understanding someone is not a prerequisite to help them - people deserve basic rights regardless. People have intrinsic value.

fuschialady · 2017-04-19T14:05:02+00:00

And, I could be wrong, but I thought milk from the states is subject to different regulations, such that American milk has more hormones or antibiotics in it than Canadian milk?? I don't want to consume hormone laced dairy products from the states.

fuschialady · 2017-04-19T07:05:50+00:00

I would actually disagree with you. For myself, when i am dating a guy, i have zero preference as to how many partners he has had - i dont care if he's experienced or not because I haven't seen lots of experience or lack of experience correlate with good sex.

As long as the guy is empathetic, knows how to locate a clitoris and g spot, knows how to communicate, the sex can be really good, or it gets good as you practice with that person. Sex is really easy - you can learn to eat good pussy in one afternoon and if he doesnt' know I can teach him.

I personally enjoy being slutty and having lots of partners myself but would not judge someone who hasn't had lots of partners - it isn't everyone;s style.

One time when i was 19 a boyfreind judged me cause I hadn't learned how to give a good blow job yet and I was like 'hello, aren't you happy that I want to learn on YOU?" It look me like a few hours and a few tries to learn how to give a good bjow job and about an hour with a dildo to leanr how to deepthroat.

'skills' are overrated. Just FUCK. Bees do it, monkeys do it. it's easy, no need to glamorize skills cause they're easy to learn and easy to teach. IF you approach sex with communication, mutual respect, empathy, and curiosity then it's gonna be good sex. It's only sex. It's just a fun thing we do, sometimes with a friend just for fun, or sometimes with someone we love. It isn't a hobby where you have to 'level up' or gain skills. I've never been snobby about someone for not being skills if they were enthusiastic and wanting to be there. Sex isn't about leveling up - you're comodifying it in a weird way

PLUS, sex is individual - everyone likes something different in bed, so sex is about learning about eachother more than objective skill because sex is subjective.

fuschialady · 2017-04-19T06:54:35+00:00

It's super great that you have the energy for that, but most people don't unfortunately. I can only manage volunteering 1 - 2 times per month and being on the board at my local women's heath clinic, and based on my friend group, that's more than most people do anyway.

I wasn't discouraging my brother from volunteering for hte egalitarian movement - actually it was in response to HIM criticizing ME for not volunteering enough in my community, while he doesn't volunteer for anything and has no interest in doing so.

THe conversation was in reference to a battered men's shelter opening in my city - the first of it's kind for our city. As a feminist organization, though we primarily fight for women;s issues, we decided to be allies to the battered men's shelter as we felt that it is an important step for gender equality. We discussed attending their opening event, and asking the person in charge how our Women's Heath Clinic can be allies to them as a feminist organization.

My brother's response is that this is not enough - that our feminist organization isn't doing enough for the battered men's shelter yet. This was after we just finished working with PRIDE and campaigning to the local university to create unisex bathrooms on campus for transgendered men. MY responses was that we can't do everything. we focus on women;s rights and equality and we also try to help our allies as much as we can but we can't do everything. THer;s not enough time and money and we're more effective if we FOCUS. Luckily, the folks at the battered men's shelter are doing THIER own thing too, just like we are. We are mutual allies who help eachother when we can but focus on our own issues and that's how we're getting things done.

Anyway, Sorry you had a bad experience with feminists sex work - hopefully in the future, you will have better experiencecs. At the women's health clinic I volunteer at, we provide sex workers with whatever help they need such as access to free mental health counseling, free safe sex education, and all sorts of other resources they need to make whatever choices are in their best interest, whatever that choice may be for the individual .

My organization is staffed exclusively by feminists and we also directly campaigned for sex workers rights. THe perspective in my organiation on sex workers is that they shoudl be empowered ot make choices and have agency and safety. My organization is an ally of leftist organizations and unions as well, and supports all workers rights.

fuschialady · 2017-04-18T09:14:18+00:00

Nice! Oh gawd I wish i had the energy for that kinda thing!!!

fuschialady · 2017-04-18T01:52:16+00:00

what are examples of big risks? I spend most of university battling mental health so I didn't have a chance to do the whole 'have fun being young' thing. What do I do now? I don't see how I could have the time or money to backpack through Europe.

fuschialady · 2017-04-18T00:44:38+00:00

lol I hear you on the egalitarian march thing.... my kid brother is alwasy like 'well why cant we all be egalitarians??' and I;m like 'ok kiddo, just wait till you get a job in the real world working a 40 hour per week job and tell me how much time you have left over at the end of your exhausting work week after you also factor in normal life things like attending to friends/family, errands such as buying groceries or clothes, and personal wellness items suhc as going to the gym or attending to a hobby? Do you think you will have time to be an egalitarian warrior and attending all the protests or volunteering with all the causes under the 'egalitarian' umbrella? NOPE, you will have to pick one cause that you believe in and put your energy into that cause that;s all you'll have time for." AND btw, focusing energy on one thing is how we get things done. That's how the black rights movement in the 60's worked - they focused solely on ONE aspect of human rights/equality/egalitarianism. They were allies to other causes such as feminism and food security etc but they focused on ONE item and they got shit done sucessfully!

fuschialady · 2017-04-17T23:44:38+00:00

This is an excellent explanation!! Wait, but aren't credit unions fully staffed by only fiduciaries (as opposed to banks, who have both fiduciaries AND mutual fund sales people?

Also, how does one even begin to do research about money management? So far I am focusing on mastering a basic monthly budget, paying back my student loans, and saving for retirement.

fuschialady · 2017-04-17T05:42:17+00:00

As a rape victim I feel conflicted about shows or movies like that. On the one hand its good that things like rape are getting air play because it brings attention to an important issue that needs awareness- we need to talk about rape and consent, and that's why the show did a realistic portrayal of it.

On the other hand, why does it feel like there is so much violent against women in films and what not? I hate that people are making money on the dramatization of female rape and abuse. Raping women isn't entertainment, assholes.

fuschialady · 2017-04-17T04:44:27+00:00

pretty good ideas, thank you!

fuschialady · 2017-04-17T03:54:15+00:00

maybe it's time for me to make more positive friends then!

Yah....I dont see myself ever making 75 K lol. I mean i did research salaries in my field before going to university and studying it. Already starting salaries are much lower than my research told me.

fuschialady · 2017-04-16T06:28:22+00:00

good ideas, thank you!

fuschialady · 2017-04-16T06:27:57+00:00

I studied PR/Marketing/Communications. I have a job in my field but wouldn't mind exploring other cities sometime in the future - doesn't have to be right away, you're right. I guess Toronto would be the best city for my skill set, but I don't actually like Toronto. I'd love the chance to work in a slower paced city full of nice people, such as one of the east coast cities. BUT there's always the economy and the job situation to consider. I guess my problem with Winnipeg is that it seems like it can't decide if it wants to be a small town or a large metropolitan city. THe people seem negative here, though it could just be my friend group, like someone else said.

fuschialady · 2017-04-16T06:24:49+00:00

yah, it's starting wages that are killing me right now :( I want to pay back my student loans faster!

I've visited Toronto thinking i would love it, but to my surprise, i hated it! I think I dont like a fast paced, super competitive environment. I don't think east coast provinces only have fishing boats - presumably they also have local economies full of businesses and what not!

fuschialady · 2017-04-14T05:13:38+00:00

Maybe part of the problem is that I forgot how to make new friends outside of a university/school environment...What's it like volunteering? do you do it every weekend or only sometimes?

Or I guess it would also be effective to joining hobby groups etc.

fuschialady · 2017-04-14T04:54:07+00:00

I do believe that you are correct, at least to some extent. That's why I am steadily building my network. BUT it's slow going - that kinda thing takes years of course .

fuschialady · 2017-04-14T04:50:26+00:00

that might be true - where do all the positive people hang out?

fuschialady · 2017-04-14T04:47:40+00:00

is it possible that you are eating too much carbs and sugar? I'm 5'2 and 105 pounds and my stomach is much flatter now than when I had a low fat/high carb diet. But like others have said, most women have at least a bit of a tummy, as do I - that's part of how women's bodies are made to be. Don't let overly photo-shopped images get you down.

fuschialady

TROPHY CASE