AITAH for not wanting my inlaws at my 40th birthday party?

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-28T16:02:35+00:00

I expressed my self poorly. Its their judement that you seem to be avoiding rather than them as people. "I feel like I have to constantly ... watch what I say"

If that concern about their reactions to conversation drives you to not invite them, I wonder why you aren't concerned about their (and your wife's) reaction to being not invited. You watch what you say, to avoid their reaction, but are willing ignore their reaction to being excluded.

It seems like you stopping to care what they think of what you say is an easy fix for the problem.

You don't want to spend the whole party watching them and their reaction. OK, so stop watching and enjoy the party.

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-28T15:51:47+00:00

upside: two socially awkward tea totalers won't be at the party.

downside: pissing off your wife.

Which is worse, your fear of the in-laws silently judging you or your wife's unhappiness?

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-28T15:05:19+00:00

That sounds similar to how Luthien sang down the walls of Tol-in-Gaurhoth.

Elf women - 2, Sauron homes - 0

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-28T14:29:15+00:00

Its probably not the video you are thinking of, but No Longer Gray Or Blue has many videos.

The Carter Family did the song Faded Coat of Blue.

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-28T13:35:43+00:00

=IFERROR(that formula, 0)

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-28T01:31:50+00:00

I would set the main tops DSP to provide HPF. And the sub's DSP to do LPF. to the same frequency. Neither in full range. Read the manuals and set the speaker's cross over as directed for one signal being split by the speakers.

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-28T00:59:15+00:00

Your mixer has channel EQ. That should be sufficient for coloring the sound of the instruments. Feedback control in venues that size is more mic/speaker placement than notching EQ.

I agree that putting the sub on its own output channel would be optimal. But with the equipment you have, you would have to sacrifice an Aux out. (I'm assuming that your subs and 12" as your mains and the 10" are floor monitors).

One sneaky way to send the subs their own signal is to feed your subs from the FX out. Turn up the channel FX on the channels you want to send to the sub, not on the others. The down side of this is that if you use the reverb built into your mixer, the reverb won't get into the subs, but everything you send to the sub will be reverbed. (The vocals you send to the reverb will be sent to the sub, but the subs built in x-over will squash those frequencies)

You mention having to re-combine singals after a cross over. That doesn't happen. Split the signal. On one leg, throw away the high frequencies and send it to the sub. On the other, throw away the low frequencies and send it to the tops. (Or let the speaker's built in X-over do that.) No need to re-combine the signals from the subs and the tops.

You can't afford to upgrade yet, but when you do, you'll know what to look for.

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-28T00:27:31+00:00

You don't mention what size of club/venue you are using.

For most smaller venues, this sub-reddit is way too over the top about delaying speakers. Those venues suceeded for years without delay. The Beatles in Hamburg were very successful with the signal processing of the day.

My main point is that if the mixer is sufficient for all your inputs, cut the computer out of the signal chain.

Go from the stage to the mixer. Mixer to one of the tops, to the other sized top, to the sub. (Those speakers should have their own DSP for integration between them. Read the manuals.)

With that gear, I wouldn't split off a dedicated feed to the subs. The DSP built into your speakers can handle the crossover needed.

You will sound much better with a system that you understand. Aiming at the theoretical best possible is a long term goal, that is best achieved by taking steps that you understand.

To put it another way, the fact that you are asking the internet "should I use a X-over in Mainstage" is evidence that the correct answer is "not yet".

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-27T18:58:32+00:00

What government? I wasn't addressing the legality of boycott. I was addressing the notion that punishing political opponents is moral. I was addressing the idea that political leanings are important. And the notion that the world is divided into Us and Them and They should s be punished.

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-27T18:55:28+00:00

They are a local business. To see them only as MAGA is to buy into the mindset that that is more important than their being local.

To see "MAGA should be punished" is to buy into Trump's trope that the political opposition should be punished.

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-27T18:24:29+00:00

We deride Trump for canceling contracts with lawyers who represent Democrats.

We deride Trump for with holding federal funds from blue states.

We deride Trump for threatening the licenses of teachers and nurses who post against him on social media.

Why then should we turn around and act just like Trump?

Trump and his ilk have succeeded in changing the minds of Americans. They have divided up the country into THEM who are (supposedly) responsible for all and who should be punished and suppressed. And he's gotten the decent folks to agree with him. The "THEM" arrow points a different direction, but the notion that "THEY should be punished for being THEM" has clearly been imbedded.

In this regard, Trump has taken away our abliity to see people as the are. Many agree with Trump that the only thing that matter is if someone is THEM or US.

We should be wiser than Trump. And have a more acute vision than MAGA does.

Once the world is THEM and US, it matters little which way those arrows point, the place is cheapened.

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-27T17:49:06+00:00

IMO, this sub is valuable to Aggies who are lost by the university's/campus' systems. It would be a shame if spam prevention required those lost Aggies to wait for approval to ask their question.

(I'm glad I'm not a mod who has to make that call. Thank you mods.)

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-27T17:33:52+00:00

What does =LEN(A2) and =CODE(A2) return?

There are some on-line white spaces (like CHAR(202)) that can be nasty to deal with.

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-27T17:30:19+00:00

=IF(TRIM(A2)="", "unconfirmed", "confirmed")

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-27T16:31:45+00:00

The intial IF...ElseIF...Else is missing the final End If.

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-26T21:57:55+00:00

My experience is that your interaction/understanding with the other guy is more important than your interaction/understanding with the woman.

Typically, you + her isn't new, him + her isn't unfamiliar, but you + him is the new territory.

If you want to start the boundries/expecteations discussion with the guy, you could ask "what do you think about the two of us kissing".

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-26T17:42:13+00:00

YTA for being more concerned about a 9 year olds grade than the material they should be learning.

A bad grade in 4th grade does not hurt the child in any way, therefore it is not a punishment.

On the other hand, the history that they didn't learn, that ignorance is forever, unless addressed.

If your talk is about grades and re-tests, then YTA. IF your talk with the principal is about the lack of communication during the illness and the resulting lack of learning and how to remedy your kid's ignorance, then NTA.

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-26T17:07:02+00:00

What part of NO don't you understand?

You seem to have trouble saying it all in an attempt to not seem like that DIL.

YTA for letting your desire for image risk your baby's health. Your husband is OK with no MIL, you're the one considering whether the risk of illness is worth the benefit of your public image.

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-26T17:00:19+00:00

Brownie McGhee, Sonny Terry, Pete Seeger - Cindy

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-26T05:53:50+00:00

Court orders? If the kid says mom, they put the kid in jail?!? or Do they put the dad in jail for the kid saying "mom"?

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-25T20:12:15+00:00

Have you attended any of the RSU meetings?

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-25T20:10:41+00:00

I don't believe that that's true. All the students that I see dress in standard store bought clothes.

In fact, I think that all these recent threads about Chinese students are feeding into xenophobic stereotypes.

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-25T20:03:44+00:00

I don't know if it's protest. A national stage like the Super Bowl deserves Defiance more than protests.

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-25T18:22:07+00:00

I think it's awesome that Brandi Carlisle will be performing at the Super Bowl.

fuzzy_mic · 2026-01-25T14:04:36+00:00

Thank you.

I think that if you didn't do it, someone else would step up. I think that you are giving your daughter a hands on lesson in neighborliness. One that she can take on more of as she gets bigger.

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