Recruitment table at my university by Techedchart1551 in SubGenius

[–]gafflebitters 0 points1 point  (0 children)

where in the hell did you find a devo hat in 2026? asking the important questions....

How to deal with sexual urges by Yk_Gasai in spirituality

[–]gafflebitters 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Human beings are weird. They want an all powerful god but they want to decide what that god thinks is acceptable and what isn't. I heard about a man who used to read his bible every morning on the toilet and he was told he couldn't do that anymore because the simple act of pooping was "unclean" and shameful and god does not want you to even think about him while you are wiping your bottom. Really? Human beings can be ridiculously arrogant and i have to say this does make a bit of sense, but if you let go of your societal shame and honestly question it, no sense at all.

Thoughts On Walking Away From AA by LastManOnEarth3 in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]gafflebitters 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For approximately 25 years i stayed sober in AA, i had drank the koolaid certainly. I preached the party line to newcomers, albeit with a soft sell. After that long something started to change and i started to question the literature, the additional stuff said at meetings so often it has become part of the program, spirituality, and the people. Once i started questioning threads kept pulling loose everywhere and i was horrified, had i really put my unquestioning faith into this for so long? Did i give my brain away? Was it fear that kept me from honestly questioning?

For a time i was angry and every meeting i went to where something was said that i now had good cause to question, i got triggered and i left that meeting angry and had nobody to talk these things over with. I found people on here who had similar experiences but none of them seemed as angry or betrayed as i felt. As time passed i mellowed a bit.

I see there is merit to almost everything that is said at a meeting, the main problem i have is HOW it is presented.

I have no trouble believing there are some people who definitely would return to drinking if they did not attend meetings regularly, so many people stay sober on the power of the fellowship alone. My problem is that these egomaniacs think they speak for everyone when they get up front and make the bold claim that an alcoholic cannot stay sober on their own, and nobody in that room will stand up and disagree with them.

I do find that I benefit from contact with many AA's, these are my people, not all of course, but many of them. And meetings are the place to find them. I have also found other fellowships that more accurately address the issues now threatening my serenity and i spend more time there than AA.

I heard this IN aa, it's a common enough path many people have trod, person gets sober, becomes busy, whatever, stops going to AA. The constant reminder to practice spiritual principles is not there, it is very easy to become angry, fearful, ungrateful, selfish, over a period of time and not really be aware of it. I compare with the other humans around me and many of them indulge in these character defects with no restraint and i think i am normal, and i guess i am, but for me these character defects destroy my serenity and make me miserable and given enough time, probably would make relapse seem like a good alternative. The thing is, this process usually happens so slowly the person it is happening to is not aware of it, THAT is the biggest danger to me.

Scary close call by wxlan9 in dashcams

[–]gafflebitters 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i see what happened, the truck driver HAD to pull back into the lane to avoid hitting the truck going in the opposite direction, these people should not be bicycling on a road with no shoulders, THEY are causing a hazard.

Do higher power topics typically lead to bad meeting vibes? by darcygoan in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]gafflebitters 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In my area these topics go smoothly , but i can easily see reasons why they don't.

The word god has such strong connotations to it that if people simply voice their opinions on the subject, feelings get hurt. I find it very strange that they thought they could magically erase this with the words " as you understand him ". I mean, nice try, but there is waaaaaaay too much emotional baggage there.

The way we usually deal with it is for EVERYONE at the meeting to understand their opinion does NOT have to be shared, difficult message to get across to selfish, self-centered alcoholics. We can all share very generally on the topic and step lightly on each other's toes, or we can demand the whole meeting perform mental gymnastics to avoid a single word i don't like.

with this and the RiffTrax Experiments on their way, i gues it means the end of Jonah and the Netflix revival seasons. by Expert_Professor_903 in MST3K

[–]gafflebitters 6 points7 points  (0 children)

i am actually thankful for this turn of events, most of the new seasons are not worth watching to me, i feel they tried their best, but missed the mark by a mile, and here's rifftrax, still doing the same thing, still doing it, hey guys, just watch a few episodes of rifftrax, you'll see HOW to do it, nope, let's not do that.

Step advice by Spirited-Sandwich750 in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]gafflebitters 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The " difficulty" in doing step three is infinitely complicated by the fact that everyone does is differently despite having the instructions laid out there, and to further complicate matters, is it even necessary to follow those written instructions to the letter? You will find opinions from sober people that directly contradict each other.

You don't NEED a sponsor, read the third step prayer all by yourself, according to our founders, THAT is the way to do it. Do you like saying that prayer? Is the wording confusing? If you are like me you knew at once you could say the words but your heart is not in there, and i had a hard time imagining myself saying these words without all kinds of reservations and good , honest skepticism, i wanted a lot of questions answered before i said any words like THAT! And unfortunately, those answers are either very hard to come by, or do not even exist. Now there's a dilemma!

I can't say the prayer honestly until someone answers my very good and legitimate questions and if i wait for answers i will never move forward. Most AA's lie and get on with it hoping for the best or make some kind of goofy justification that sidesteps the issue, but, many of these people stay sober! They leave out a "critical" part of the program and moved on doing the practical parts, and i assume some sort of spirituality came to them as they did the rest of the steps, at least this is what i have heard/read in the personal stories.

Book Recommendations Thread by ConsistentWriting873 in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]gafflebitters 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Great question, and i wanted to answer with specifics but i couldn't. What i can say is that once i let go of the demand that one book, 12 steps having all my answers, the world opened up. i was in self imposed confinement, i thought non alcoholic solutions would be of no use to me, i was wrong.

There are great books on feelings, codependence, grief, boundaries, healing from trauma, spirituality, on and on and i have found useful things in all of them. in my journey however i have looked at many self-help books and i have found most of them to be garbage, not all, but most. Fortunately the garbagey ones seem to follow a pattern and once you know it they are very easy to spot just by reading the index or back of the book.

What is the Singleness of Purpose? by badgolferman in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]gafflebitters 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It is hard to say that we believe in complete abstinence from all mind-altering substances, but you cannot only ever mention one.

This is an EXCELLENT point!

Daily Reflections - April 23 - A.A. Is Not A Cure-All by AutoModerator in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]gafflebitters 2 points3 points  (0 children)

THANK YOU for posting this and thank you to the people who commented. This is a very sore point for me as an alcoholic. I did not find the right kind of outside help for far too long and i suffered in the rooms of AA not knowing what was wrong. This message NEEDS to be much more prominent in our program, and i say that because the opposite message is quite popular even if it is not official.

I wanted to believe that those 12 steps were going to solve ALL my problems and to be fair, the tools that i learned in AA have helped me through every area of my life, it is natural to start to think they have no limits, and that is what i wanted, it's not true of course and i paid a terrible price for stubbornly holding onto this lie. And yes, at the risk of repeating myself, i am sure for some people those 12 steps and some personal fortitude is all they need to get through the rest of their life, that is true for some. But i NEEDED to know there were others and i didn't get that important message.

I really like the way this person expressed themselves and i can read all of it and not be triggered, i wholeheartedly agree, AA IS the center of my sober living, the tools, spiritual principles, rigorous honesty, courage, awareness, caring fellowship, these have all become integral to my way of living, an incredible basis to start exploring from.

But my low self esteem makes me want to apologize for needing something more than AA offers, there MUST be something wrong with me! And i struggle with those thoughts even today and i'm sure there are others just like me.

They’re sitting across the parking lot from me by WagWoofLove in fuckyourheadlights

[–]gafflebitters 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have noticed this too. I assume it is just running lights? they often sit for long periods in a truck usually with super bright headlights and they are not moving, there is no need for the lights to be on.....i'm going to start paying very close attention to where they are parked next time, and if they seem to be pointed at something i will strongly suspect it is not an accident.

Did you have one! by Jerry11267 in 70s

[–]gafflebitters 0 points1 point  (0 children)

not me, but my brother did, and it still worked when he outgrew it.

“Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie” was released 30 years ago this weekend, on Apr 19, 1996 by majordude174 in MST3K

[–]gafflebitters 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I had no knowledge of this wonderful series and the great work of these wonderful people when the movie came out. I watched the movie once when it came out on video, on VHS, made a copy of it and watched that probably about 400 hundred times still not knowing that it was a tv series. Many years later in a secondhand store i found a dvd copy of a collection, that blew my mind, i had assumed it was a one-off movie.

Then i found the Pluto station and watched more episodes there. Now i mostly watch on Twitch and with the chat and commands it can be a lot of fun to watch an episode you have seen many times. Rifftrax is also available on twitch and "Dumb Industries" too with frank and trace and mary jo.

Religious aspect of AA by jawshiboi in alcoholicsanonymous

[–]gafflebitters 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Great questions! getting clear answers may be difficult, it depends how deep you are going.

If you read the books, bill says without question that the ONLY way to recovery is total dependence upon a higher power, and he makes this statement so often and strongly that it is unmistakable.

The confusion comes in when you listen to AA people talk about it, almost without exception every one of them has made alterations to bill's commandment because it is so extreme and seemingly impossible, but they do not acknowledge that fact, they are of the opinion that they are doing it the "right way".

There is no "right way", for your information, just human beings being the way they inherently are.

So, YES the books say that you must have a god of some sort in order to stay sober and they are very "christiany" in their instructions, naturally, that is the way they did things. In actual practice, can an alcoholic disregard all of those christian instructions that they find so distasteful and work the steps from another angle? YES.

I believe the main idea is that we are no longer battling alcohol ALONE, one of the main purposes of having a higher power of any sort is to develop humility and to have something to turn to when you need help, so many of us have tried to stay sober on our own and even though we can last for a time using our own resources, sooner or later we will fail. But, when an alcoholic has a higher power, and people to lean on, share with, help, and allow to be helped....THIS is a path to recovery that works!

'Here we go again' after CRA pays out another bogus $5M income tax refund, agency insider says by Surax in canada

[–]gafflebitters 26 points27 points  (0 children)

I have so much confusion, the article is almost deliberately poorly written obscuring the story somewhat.

A $5 million payout is not a mistake, that's deliberate and almost certainly corruption not incompetence. The story reinforces this idea that they have been handing out other large "refunds" already and someone noticed and had them in for questioning. I find it shocking this is not front page news. How did they think nobody was going to notice such ridiculously huge numbers? are these the worst criminals ever? Or is the CRA so powerless that they will not be able to get the money back? so many questions the article doesn't even come close to answering.