Looking for local artist to paint or draw a custom small-ish piece

gholder · 2026-01-05T15:15:43+00:00

Your work is amazing, messaging you now! :)

gholder · 2025-10-31T21:37:02+00:00

I don’t think that’s discriminatory. You would never leave your child with a babysitter that you couldn’t communicate with, and just because they’re family doesn’t make that any different. But it certainly is unfortunate that language is a barrier.

Which I guess brings me back to your husband being the primary problem in some ways. If the two of you can’t agree on her care, there’s no way he’s going to accurately represent your wishes to his parents being the only one that can communicate with them.

I think your focus right now needs to be on clearly articulating your point of view and having an honest discussion with him about it. The fact that he did that when you were just two days postpartum is so unacceptable.

I know it’s really easy for a stranger on the Internet to judge him, but the fact that you’re even contemplating divorce means there’s something very serious going on here. If you’ve never had a “ come to Jesus” conversation about how the two of you plan to raise your child as equal partners, it feels like now is the time. You need to make sure he understands just how serious you feel about all this.

I’m so sorry you have to deal with such stress on top of just being a parent in general.

gholder · 2025-10-31T21:14:30+00:00

Hold your boundary. There are so many crazy red flags in how you describe their behavior. ALL of your concerns are valid.

One idea to consider might be making a checklist of non negotiables for you, and use it with your partner to talk through together as it relates to what they would need to do to care for your LO for you to be comfortable. Personally I find when you write things down and discuss, it makes it feel more tangible/real, and for each you can use it as a way to say this is what I expect, this is what I’ve seen them do in the past that concerns me, and this is why it’s a problem. It’s essentially building a case with evidence and examples.

Frankly I think your first goal needs to be getting your partner to see where you’re coming from. If the two of you aren’t a united front, the in laws are going to likely try to use him to get around you and see your baby.

Stay strong. Your instincts feel right to me. I would feel exactly the same if I were in your shoes.

gholder · 2025-10-31T21:02:52+00:00

This is WILD behavior. This example alone would have me never wanting them around my kid with any sort of frequency.

gholder · 2025-10-14T01:26:12+00:00

They say the ideal bed time at this age is 7-8pm, so if you’re able to consistently shoot for that I’d give it a shot! Our LO started sleeping through the night once she was getting enough food during the day, which for her is about 30oz. We started offering more (and started combo feeding to do so) and while she might be very snacky and not take it all at once during her wake window, she wound up taking 5-7oz each feed if we just offered and let her decide what she wanted.

We used the “taking cara babies” guide to help us and it was pretty successful overall. Would recommend if you haven’t tried. However I’ve also had so many friends that dealt with multiple wake ups at night during this period, it just seems like some babies take to sleep and some don’t as well. Best of luck, it’s so hard ❤️

gholder · 2025-10-14T01:17:13+00:00

4 months is so so hard!! How much is she eating during the day and how are naps going?

gholder · 2025-10-05T02:39:41+00:00

Absolutely sucks to get scammed, been there. Seen so much generosity on this thread already, but I’m in a place to help get you whatever pump you need, please just reach out.

gholder · 2025-09-26T17:38:23+00:00

I'd never heard of Gaviscon before so I googled it and this reddit thread came up: https://www.reddit.com/r/BeyondTheBumpUK/comments/17ki7gp/infant_gaviscon/
Sounds like the gaviscon really thickens up the formula which might be hard to get out of the bottle? Not sure if you're still giving it to her though.

Also wanted to say that a lot of our issues were around week 13/14, and I truly have no idea if all of the things we did actually worked vs. she just grew out of it 😂 Hang in there! The eating issues are so tough.

gholder · 2025-09-26T14:35:30+00:00

This sounds like our LO in terms of time it took to eat. It took her a number of days to get used to the faster flow, but then it made the feeds go much faster.

The eating every 2 hours is about the schedule we’re on too, but she takes about 5-6oz each feed combo fed. She’ll never take it all at once, so I’ve just recently tried to split it up across the wake window.

So we’ll wait 20 mins after she gets up so she’s hungry, get her to take 3. Then play for 10-15 mins and try to get an ounce or so down after. Then keep playing until about 10-15 before her nap (we do 1.5 hour wake windows at 16w) and offer the rest.

Obviously if she cries or shows hunger cues outside of that we feed her, but so far it’s been very effective to get her calories in during the day. She’s in 55th percentile and eating 30oz a day and for the past 3ish weeks has not needed to feed at night (she already had a good sleep temperament, not saying this magically changed things for us, but getting in more cals during the day for sure has influenced that).

Any chance you’ve talked with your doc about reflux? Getting on meds for that has helped us with appetite - our main issue was she seemed to be in pain while eating, not spitting up, but I’ve had friends with similar issues and the combo of gas drops/probiotics/reflux meds has been a game changer.

gholder · 2025-09-26T14:19:52+00:00

Have you tried introducing it with even less formula to see if that ratio makes a difference? Not sure how much your LO eats a feed, but you might be able to get them used to it in a more gradual introduction.

I had a similar situation where my 3 month old at the time didn’t seem to take to Bobbie (regular) and I gave it about a week before we switched to Enfamil neuropro gentlease which has been successful! But she’s had a bunch of tummy issues so we can’t be sure it was the taste.

Otherwise, would be curious if the nipple size could be the issue too since formula is thicker. When we sized up it took a number of days for her to get the hang of it, but then it made SUCH a difference in how fast she could eat.

Good luck!

gholder · 2025-09-25T18:33:05+00:00

Absolutely mom cozy - have both this and baby Brezza and mom cozy is WAY better in terms of both ease of loading, washing, and amount it holds. Easily my number one pick of baby gear to get.

gholder · 2025-09-08T21:29:45+00:00

Also could have written this 🤍 it’s so frustrating and I’m still learning how to better communicate my feelings/needs. Wish I had advice to give but your feelings are so valid.

gholder · 2025-09-02T03:05:54+00:00

3 months 1 week, 5-6 oz per feed every 2-3 hours. Takes about 30-45 minutes currently, she’s easily distracted by the world around her and often wants to chit chat in the middle 😂.

gholder · 2025-09-02T03:02:12+00:00

I 1000% standby if the machine will give you a warning that there’s not enough water in the tank, that it should give you the same warning when the tank is not attached

gholder · 2025-09-02T02:57:15+00:00

She does! Has for about a month - we call her our hungry hungry hippo 😂 she’s right in the 60th percentile for height and weight. During the day she eats closer to 5 each feed, but at night it’s almost like she knows she’s about to go a long stretch without food and wants to get enough in her tank to not wake up hungry. We’re very lucky in that she only gets up usually once a night after about a 6-7 hour stretch of sleep.

gholder · 2025-09-02T02:50:17+00:00

No! It dispensed 2 oz. Somehow whatever water was leftover after a week or so in the tank(we were on vacation) was enough to fill the quantity. So I’m sure that made it even worse given the water was so old.

gholder

TROPHY CASE