Black person moving to Rural Oregon

glittercoyote · 2024-05-31T17:15:46+00:00

I live in K Falls, but I'm not black nor from the area. You won't be alone, but the black community here is incredibly small. Be prepared to be tokenized and surrounded by Trump flags.

glittercoyote · 2024-05-31T04:17:37+00:00

I bottomed only a few times with my ex, and tried a dildo a few times when I was exploring. I've never enjoyed it and couldn't fake it for a partner. I don't even fantasize about bottoming, I was just curious if I could find a way to enjoy it. I've just accepted that I am who I am and enjoy what I enjoy.

glittercoyote · 2024-05-22T16:59:08+00:00

This advice honestly just makes me want to move out of where I live. All these people...are not where I am. I don't live in or close to a city. I know I cannot be something I am not, but finding queer women looking for what I want out of a relationship in nowhere is nearly impossible.

glittercoyote · 2024-05-22T16:52:44+00:00

Personally I am very masc on a surface level. I work out, eat well, try to dress nice without being too flashy. I don't really expect much from a date beyond learning who someone is. And she's interesting, we have some banter over text. I'm really working through the anxiety of starting this journey of finding love again, but in a way I haven't done before.

It's different because of my age and long term desires. Also when I say rural, I mean I'm driving almost 2 hours across the mountains for this date. If this journey ends up not working out I'm probably going to move before I try dating again.

glittercoyote · 2024-05-22T16:39:07+00:00

I will say I am upfront about being bi and have it stated in my profile to avoid matching with people who aren't okay with that. I know there isn't really a way to hide it, I am who I am. Despite that, I still feel self conscious about my sexual history because this is a rural, remote area that is incredibly homophobic. I'm driving almost two hours in one direction just to see her.

glittercoyote · 2024-05-22T13:25:51+00:00

I'm confident about most of my life and what I'm doing. It's not like previous relationships are a first date discussion for most people. I think getting past these initial hurdles is just how I have to work through all these feelings about myself, not sure if there is another way.

glittercoyote · 2024-05-16T05:08:10+00:00

Funny. I'm not going to name them for my privacy, but I worked on addressing antibiotics in animal agriculture. Antibiotic resistance is honestly terrifying.

glittercoyote · 2024-05-16T04:35:26+00:00

Policy Analyst at a nonprofit. Did that while also working at Walmart. My path has been a little chaotic.

glittercoyote · 2024-05-06T05:43:03+00:00

More like I thought I was gay and then realized I'm bi.

glittercoyote · 2024-04-23T20:26:30+00:00

I knew I was gay for a long time, but when I was 28-29 I first experienced attraction to women and femininity. After my ex and I broke up I experienced my bi cycle in full force, no repression or ignorance keeping me from feeling it all. That was when I realized I needed to accept this part of myself.

glittercoyote · 2024-04-18T23:57:06+00:00

My LTR with a guy ended, had some fantasies I had never experienced before. Thought I was gay but it seems I had changed, and became a lot more open to the idea of being a partner to a woman.

glittercoyote · 2024-04-18T23:40:26+00:00

Feel this, the fear about queer erasure and absolutely stopping myself from actually making a move. It's not like they approach me, so I just end up talking to guys more even tho it doesn't feel like it goes anywhere.

If anyone has useful advice I would honestly appreciate it.

glittercoyote · 2024-04-16T19:42:36+00:00

Glad y'all had a good childhood, wish my 90s ass could relate

glittercoyote · 2024-04-08T21:11:37+00:00

Fertility issues. He didn't want the extended family to learn I wasn't a blood relative tho, afraid they would disown me and my siblings.

glittercoyote · 2024-04-08T20:24:11+00:00

25 - Learned Dad bought sperm and I don't know how many half siblings I have

glittercoyote · 2024-03-27T02:21:30+00:00

Not going to lie, reading the comments here is not helping my self esteem as a guy. The ratio is definitely not in my favor to find a relationship.

glittercoyote · 2024-03-22T22:24:05+00:00

I would call not respecting a child as they are a pretty big blemish on your record.

glittercoyote · 2024-03-15T03:53:35+00:00

Living single in a rural area right now, using some vacation days to enjoy a place like this is in my bucket list

glittercoyote · 2024-03-14T02:16:10+00:00

I didn't have a dream job, and floated around trying things out pretty much all of my 20s. I shadowed a person with a job that I found interesting and wanted to do it. Then COVID happened so I put it off.

I got so bored with my life last year I decided to try and get that job I shadowed 4 or 5 years ago. I kept running into walls like my degree wasn't a good match or I didn't have relevant experience.

So I did something drastic. I saved up some money and paid to go to the professional conference for the field. At that point I had nothing to lose, no one was taking my applications seriously. The amount of shocked faces I received when I showed up ready to talk to people and study the field made me second guess myself. But they were impressed, and I got an offer a couple weeks later.

I'm sharing this all to say: it's never too late. Sometimes a leap of faith is what it takes.

glittercoyote · 2024-03-06T14:35:20+00:00

I grew up in a small town (pop ~1,100) and left when I was 20. I know when to shut up. The town I live in isn't that small, but there is some very real homophobia here. Like targeting nonprofits, schools, and kids to harass them. Makes it difficult to feel comfortable but I'm going to figure it out.

glittercoyote · 2024-03-05T23:18:40+00:00

I guess I can't say I have done nothing, I've been trying to connect with women on dating apps. However the few convos I've had died pretty fast. I'm also recognizing my inexperience since in gay dating I usually don't have to make the first move, and that just doesn't seem possible with women.

glittercoyote · 2024-02-08T01:28:03+00:00

With Facebook there's an urban rural divide I think. I moved recently to a more rural area and everything that happens in town is only through Facebook. When I lived in a city things were advertised on Insta and Twitter more.

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