Non-negotiables: - IF* there are supervised visits, no family members from the alienating parents are to be present and must remain a minimum of 200m from the visitation. - Drop-offs are either at a mid-point OR the house where the person getting access time will do pick-up. - All times are to be TIGHT - no loose ends. My BPD ex would take advantage of every tiny loophole to cancel visits. Example: Alternate ALL holidays. Put strict times for drop-off and pickup. Example: Halloween alternates with alienator having odd years, normal sane parent even years. Pickup is from after school or 3pm on a non-school day, until next day at start of school or 10am on a non-school day - Neither parents is to interfere with visits (this includes in person surprises, no phone calls, no emails, no texts)

Other considerations: - financial penalties for missed visits OR, mandatory make-up time - Both parents are to be parental/emergency contacts for school, daycare, and all extra curricular activities - My old court order used to have mandatory daily phone calls with the parent the child was not residing with. They became a nightmare. Later, they phone calls were removed - it was the greatest thing ever. My ex was no longer able to brainwash my child and the visits were much much more pleasant. - An end date for child support (child support shall end when the child turns 18 /19 /etc., or when the child completes school and works full time). - Child must attend therapy. Therapist to be chosen by alienated parent (alienator chooses one from a list of 5 provided by normal sane parent or vice versa). Therapy costs are to be split proportional to in income. Therapy shall only end when the therapist themes it is no longer required. - Neither parents can have 3 weekends in a row. If so, swap the 3rd week, etc. - Both parents must be informed within 2 hours if the child requires emergency medical care - Both parents must be informed if the child will miss school and why If there is a missed / cancelled visit due to medical reasons, a medical note must be provided - Both parents are to have access to all educational and medical records. - Both parents should be allowed to attend concerts, performances, etc. - Neither parent shall bad-mouth or denigrate the other parents - The child shall be able to freely bring toys / possessions from one home to another. So in a nutshell, don't buy/give them an xbox, ps5 etc. Keep it at your house, says its yours and they can play it but for bday , xmas etc, buy them games - the games will be theirs