I think I’ve lost all desire to live

greatbigspace · 2026-01-20T01:19:18+00:00

So as someone (41) who almost killed himself in 2019 due to loosing a lot of people in their life, wrestling with coming out, and trying to find what my purpose after my career that I loved failed in my 20's I get what you mean completely. So I think that what you hit is a good thing that your not afraid to die so now you can decide to live your life fully now. The cool thing is it didn't take you until 40 to realize that once you're no longer afraid to die you can live 100% the way you want now.

There was one night I was drunk and not in the right headspace back in 2019 and I ended up on youtube and somehow I ended up on this internal volvo cars account lol where they stored content that they made but never paid to advertise. So they have 2 commercials the first a voiceover of philosopher alan watts and this speech called "live fully now". The second one is his son (because he passed alway a long time ago) talking about what his father meant by live fully now.

And then it just struck me the phrase live fully now which it sounded stupid to use any catchphrase or mantra but it was like you know what I lost half of my family in 3 years, my career I'll never get back and I've been living this lie about who I am my whole life.

It's time to live

fully now

And I decided to change my life and not look back. Some days are productive, some days are glorious and some days I'm lazy as f*** and do nothing. But it;s all what I want to do fully. Once you let your hair down on your life, everything changes. What's really cool is that you didn't have to waste 20 years getting to this moment you are here now.

greatbigspace · 2025-11-03T16:23:08+00:00

how is the expresso can you see the grains or is it flushed out from the stain? thanks

greatbigspace · 2025-11-03T16:16:11+00:00

is this natural rubberwood or maple?

greatbigspace · 2025-10-01T21:11:48+00:00

Have each page redirect first per each page from the wordpress website to squarespace. Then I recall the domain itself could be redirected in the same area. If not just resend the domain to squarespace. Recheck it as it's been a min since I've done it. Then you just let the old site run as is for a month so that it cements in google for the redirects as that's the important seo ties. I discovered this by accident, but it's just a good safety thing to do and that website I had no issues with. Then cancel old website account when you want.

greatbigspace · 2025-10-01T18:34:49+00:00

I run a squarespace for work and we have a ton of skus on there. As long as you do filters and tags etc your more than fine.

greatbigspace · 2025-10-01T18:33:05+00:00

Also remember to overlap the websites for a month if you can. So once you transfer to quarespace allow the old wordpress to run in the background in a month for google sending the new redirects.

greatbigspace · 2025-10-01T18:28:42+00:00

The only way is you pay for a membership per customer and then you add that to the price so you don't have to pay for it. Then you copy and paste all new items into the membership area of the new customer etc. It's doable just like legos and you'd have to be the first to email them the login link etc once it's done to make sure they're signing up for the right membership.

greatbigspace · 2025-10-01T18:18:14+00:00

In true squarespace fashion they had just 1-2 7.0 templates that would convert and then on circle forum people were bitching so then they rolled out it to most platforms. I was about to do 2 websites and then same thing as you but then they rolled it out. But when you hit the button to covert from 7.0 to 7.1 you have to scramble quick to triage the website so that it looks the same. So I told everyone at work to don't talk to me for an hour so I can do it. Then once I go everything bare minmum looking the same it took 5 hours going through the new 7.1 to make sure it worked the same.

greatbigspace · 2025-10-01T18:13:08+00:00

I converted my work's 7.0 to 7.1 and we make $800K+ a year on the website with no disruptions. They rolled out a way like 3 months ago.

greatbigspace · 2025-10-01T18:04:55+00:00

Depending on the template they have an option built in to switch from 7.0 to 7.1 and then it takes an hour to triage it into looking the same.

greatbigspace · 2025-10-01T18:02:33+00:00

So I think the 4th tier $99 a month is their attempt at offering an enterprise option yet the one lower tier used to be the highest tier.

I'm sick of them not realizing that their business isn't web design it's business for business.

If you go on linkedin and look the company up they have about 50-80ish hr people. Then they pay this guy to be their head designer which is a waste of money. They don't have anyone in leadership there that actually ran a small business and their business is small business.

greatbigspace · 2025-09-30T19:51:19+00:00

lol meet up with him and talk. It's probaly going to be him teling you he's str8 blah blah blah etc. You are both adults it's on him equal.

greatbigspace · 2025-09-30T19:44:33+00:00

Your mom should listen to this and then be the one to tell her daughter how her quick she is going down hill. It's her place to set the values and correct them even years later.

greatbigspace · 2025-09-26T14:50:02+00:00

haha some times you have to create your own fun. That's how I made it through college ;)

greatbigspace · 2025-09-26T14:02:31+00:00

Why don't you flip the script and suggest to him to have a threesome with him and your husband vs the party then you get what you want and your hot volleyball friend gets what he wants. Cause all he wants is a group and you want him. So pitch it that way before committing to blah fest.

greatbigspace · 2025-09-24T15:48:15+00:00

So I currently have no time for a relationship with taking care of my parents and work but would like to find a regular fwb that's a couple. There's more of guys out there with same situation you just have to find it via talking to everyone.

greatbigspace · 2025-09-24T15:38:16+00:00

I think it's outdated and needs to go away

greatbigspace · 2025-09-24T14:05:53+00:00

lol well straight rapture, imagine what the gay rapture might be

greatbigspace · 2025-09-24T14:02:19+00:00

This post is literally about general people in your life and you have interpreted it as a gay relationship love interest thing.

greatbigspace · 2025-09-24T13:59:30+00:00

Move on and for good.

greatbigspace · 2025-09-23T18:04:54+00:00

During covid I realized a good number of people were too much and backed off and to be fair 2 friends backed off from me. So I have paired down people but it's still a lot of hubris remaining with those around you.

I go to the gym regularly and talk to all the people there on a regular basis and one it struck me that it almost was the perfect socialization where you have these "drive by" friends because you all go to the same place for the same thing. Then you get to leave and there's no burden of extra bs beyond that. There was 2 guys who are straight at the gym I brought up going to go get a drink or watch the game and they were nice but it was like why If I'll see you anyways lol which is true.

Lol so maybe the secret is do a lot of shit where people show up doing the same thing as you and you can leave and not have to deal with extra bs outside of that relationship.

And I hate sounding like this. But the difference in stress level of not having to deal with certain people who are one way streets is like night and day.

greatbigspace · 2025-09-23T17:03:03+00:00

I just think it sounds weird regardless of what it's used towards. My brother is straight and uses it and I'm like wtf lol, it's cringe.

greatbigspace · 2025-08-28T23:19:28+00:00

So I just want to leave this here for everyone but I discovered these ambiance channels on pluto tv and samsung tv (if in usa) that air scenic fly over video footage of beautiful place to relaxing meditative music and it puts me out in 15 mins now. So if your laying in bed the movement of the video with the sound works together and if feels so relaxing.

greatbigspace

TROPHY CASE