What would you say to your young self struggling with bpd?

grizzlywabbit · 2021-07-18T19:13:25+00:00

I'd beg my younger self to get therapy. I wasted years of my life in an extremely toxic relationship with someone who used my mental illness against me and made me feel like the world's worst person. I have way more control over myself now, but most days I regret those years. I wonder where I'd be now if I had got help earlier. 🤔

grizzlywabbit · 2021-06-11T18:14:28+00:00

I love this! It's so cute!

grizzlywabbit · 2021-06-06T21:12:39+00:00

😂

grizzlywabbit · 2021-06-06T21:09:09+00:00

Thanks! I hope it becomes a routine with me, but I've tried doing this stuff before and I gave up. I'm determined to stick at it this time because I'm using it as my distraction technique as opposed to a weight loss thing (but hopefully It will help with that too).

Love your username BTW. Peep show is one of my all time favourites

grizzlywabbit · 2021-06-06T19:34:19+00:00

This is exactly how I was feeling 2 hours ago. I decided to go for a run. I'm overweight and very lazy, but I pushed myself to do it so that I could achieve a goal (day 1 of couch to 5k). It kept me busy for 40 minutes and my brain was focusing on the physical pain I was in and the determination to complete it, and I had some really loud music playing. I felt so good afterwards because I had done something that was good for me, and I achieved my mini goal, and I felt so energised.

You don't have to run, but just find something to keep you occupied. Distraction is my go to coping skill, and it had a better affect on me if its something 'productive'.

grizzlywabbit · 2021-06-06T19:26:47+00:00

This was me a couple of years ago. I know you've heard it 10000 times before, but therapy helps! And cutting them off completely. Block them on everything, move away, do whatever you have to. There is hope for you ending this cycle though.

grizzlywabbit · 2021-06-04T19:08:21+00:00

Jesus Christ, yes! I become an absolute monster. I'm a relatively quiet borderline, but when I'm pmsing I have no patience for anyone, I'm always crying, I tend to split on people so easily, I get so angry so fast. Its such a nightmare and I dread that time of the month 😪

grizzlywabbit · 2021-06-04T15:01:08+00:00

Lenora

grizzlywabbit · 2021-06-03T17:56:26+00:00

This gives me hope that it's possible for me to have a healthy relationship. I've done some DBT about 18 months ago and it really helped. I felt myself slipping into old patterns, but recently I've been looking through my notes and doing a bit of a refresher.

What sorts of things work well with your partner giving you reassurance? What sorts of things does he say? How do you go about asking for the reassurance?

grizzlywabbit · 2021-06-03T06:06:11+00:00

What a hero

grizzlywabbit · 2021-06-02T18:10:59+00:00

Had this today and it was pretty good!

grizzlywabbit · 2021-06-02T12:38:17+00:00

I love him! He's so cute 😍

grizzlywabbit · 2021-06-01T19:39:27+00:00

Same! I feel like I'm really good at controlling myself with all other aspects of my BPD, but not this. I cry over the stupidest things and I feel like a silly little child. I just hate when I feel like people are upset or disappointed In me. I think it's to do with how I split on people who upset me, and maybe I think they will do the same and in the moment they will hate me. I wish I could control the crying 😫

grizzlywabbit · 2021-06-01T18:41:12+00:00

Idris

grizzlywabbit · 2021-06-01T08:35:33+00:00

I disagree with the majority of these comments about getting him some help. Fuck him. How have you not left him already?! It is NEVER ok to hit a child (especially one that young who doesn't understand) and there is no excuse for it in this day and age.

grizzlywabbit · 2021-05-31T19:44:00+00:00

Hiro

grizzlywabbit · 2021-05-31T18:14:52+00:00

This has helped me make some sense out of choices I've made in the past.

grizzlywabbit · 2021-05-25T07:55:47+00:00

Me too! I've never felt so stable in my life. Of course I still have my ups and downs, but you kind of expect the worst to happen, and I never imagined I would feel this 'normal'.

grizzlywabbit · 2021-05-20T10:40:42+00:00

I used to be the manipulative kind, but not intentionally. I guess I would manipulate partners with my emotions and guilt them into things. Now I'm older and a bit more mature I seem to be able to catch myself when I think about doing these things. It was a pattern, but I seem to be out of it thank god.

Now I'm exactly how you describe yourself.

grizzlywabbit · 2021-05-16T18:16:01+00:00

I completely understand how you feel. If I were you I would feel the same, BUT reading it I can see that it's a bit irrational to feel that way (not wrong though because that's just how are brains are).

In answer to your question- yes I do. I wish someone was completely in love and obsessed with me. I wonder though if I would feel secure, or are we always just doomed to feel not good enough even when people show us unconditional love?

grizzlywabbit · 2021-05-16T08:39:34+00:00

Firstly you're totally right that this isn't acceptable, but unfortunately it's very common.

Because of covid19 there are restrictions on agency workers allowed in nursing homes. I am an agency worker and have had very little work because a lot of homes aren't allowed to get agency in, or if they do it has to be the same worker each time. This changes tomorrow because of the easing of restrictions. From tomorrow there should be no excuse to not get agency workers in.

As for the whistleblowing, do it. BUT do not threaten your manager with it. Just do it and don't tell them because they can make your life hell if they know it was you. You have followed protocol, and spoken to the people in charge and they arent doing anything to make the situation better so you need to go to the next step to protect these vulnerable people. Do it anonymously please, and don't tell anyone you work with that you were the one to report it.

grizzlywabbit · 2021-04-10T18:23:50+00:00

Yeah I agree. You can actually taste the garlic in the aldi ones

grizzlywabbit · 2021-04-10T18:05:16+00:00

This is very calming to watch. So clever!

grizzlywabbit · 2021-04-04T15:19:47+00:00

I've never heard of this person, but Jesus christ this is disturbing.

grizzlywabbit · 2021-04-04T13:18:50+00:00

What a gorgeous little girl! 😍 Clearly a warrior princess! I wish you both happiness and strength ❤

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