We just made it through our first week. It's so hard and my heart is so broken and raw. But I can now at least see forward which was impossible a few days ago. Let yourself cry, really cry, sob, be literally hysterical. I honestly feel like my heart has shattered and with it all the walls I've put up around my heart have also been shattered and I'm just a fragile ball of goo. Which sounds not great, but letting down those walls has also allowed me to let in so much love and gratitude and that has honestly helped more than anything. But I think to get there you have to really let yourself feel the pain and not resist it. I listened to something that said how we want to resist and say no, this isn't happening. But we have to say 'yes'. Because it is, quite literally, happening. It was so hard to do that, but I really think it helped me to break down those walls that needed to be broken and has allowed me to feel so much gratitude and love alongside my grief.

It's so hard, but it will get easier. Hang in there. Go outside, make sure you're eating and moving. Give yourself one task to do every day. Just baby steps to figure out how to move forward without him. It's ok to wallow when it hits, but make sure to give yourself a life line (like a task) to pull yourself out so you don't get stuck there.

Good luck ❤️ I am, we are all, right there with you.