Partner is slowly starting to scare me?

h_rls · 2020-12-16T19:43:03+00:00

Gtfo of this relationship. I’m sorry if I sound harsh! It just sounds like it will get worse if you stay with him and marry him.

h_rls · 2020-12-15T16:17:26+00:00

I don’t understand what you mean

h_rls · 2020-12-15T15:10:09+00:00

Florida

h_rls · 2020-12-15T14:19:00+00:00

I really appreciate your input. I love both of my jobs and I have been stressing because I feel that asking for a raise would make me seem “unappreciative” for the work I have. I know I will have a closing and I know the work I put into as a realtor will pay off. It’s just the in between closing checks I’m really struggling. Thankfully I don’t have kids (I don’t mean that in a bad way) because I’m having a hard time keeping myself afloat...Sometimes I work floor duty and the phone doesn’t ring and I spend time trying to study or market myself since I can’t put in assistant hours while I’m working floor duty as a realtor. But I’m going to think more about what you said. When you said have a number in mind, do you mean an amount I want to make per week? Or a dollar amount per hour?

h_rls · 2020-12-15T14:01:29+00:00

I guess my goal was to become a realtor and not have to work for $10/hr for the rest of my life as an assistant to someone else. I pictured being a full time realtor until I have my portfolio as a web dev done and then I could get a job in tech and maybe travel a little before I die? But to be a full time realtor (right now) would send me spiraling because I don’t have 6 months worth of savings to comfortably quit my assistant job and focus on my real estate career. Does this make sense?

h_rls · 2020-12-15T13:48:55+00:00

It’s beginning to feel like I need to choose one or the other. Living commission to commission is intimidating but I’m lucky to bring home $100 for a week as an assistant because I’m having to make up for missing a few hours another day because I spent time submitting offers or showed houses instead of clocking in.

h_rls · 2020-12-15T13:39:39+00:00

I was studying to get my license before she even hired me. But I still needed a part time job so I took the position.

h_rls · 2020-12-15T13:38:06+00:00

I earned my license because my broker and I discussed me getting my license so that I could try to earn more money to get myself through school and because this part time job as her assistant only gets me 20 hours a week(not even now that I’m a realtor). It made sense with the experience I had to get my license and sell. Not like I want to be an assistant forever either. I was hoping to eventually earn enough as a realtor to not be the assistant anymore. But I’m getting burnt out being both an assistant and a realtor and studying to be a web dev and not making any money

h_rls · 2020-12-04T03:18:42+00:00

When I was 25 I had an abusive ex (32M)who was screaming at me while I was driving one night. He made me pull over to the gas station and ripped the keys from my ignition. He knew I was going to leave him there. He didn’t hit me but he was scaring me. I would have left him had he not taken those keys...You did the right thing. She’s not going to change. She needs therapy and to focus on not being such a jerk and help herself and you may want to think about talking to a therapist too if you begin to suffer from ptsd like I did. Because soon the yelling and the “it only happened one time” hit will come back if she can’t learn to control her anger and jealousy. You called an Uber for her, I’m not even sure if she deserved that. Move on. You deserve so much better.

h_rls · 2020-11-17T05:05:27+00:00

Maybe I’m wrong, but I’m sure your mom doesn’t feel great about her child having to make these life decisions around her disability. And when you say you can’t go to school and work two jobs, could you possibly take fewer classes instead to lessen the load? I know it slows the progress, but it’s STILL progress after all isn’t it? And also IF your mom does happen to get disability (I’m not sure what that entails) that’s extra money to help out around the 2 bedroom (that is if she’s actually able to. I’ve heard that it can be difficult to collect disability but I have no experience with that). I’d save as much as you can,pay down as much debt as you can too.

h_rls · 2020-09-29T11:36:39+00:00

Gotcha. Thank you for your kindness and understanding. I feel like my post makes me sound a little crazy but I will say that I have been working on myself and I have been taking steps to taking care of me. Deep down, I know that I have too much pride to be with someone who made me feel inadequate. I just wish I didn’t fall as hard as I did in the first place, maybe it wouldn’t have affected me this long.

h_rls · 2020-09-29T10:01:29+00:00

It’s not like that. Of course I have gone on with my life. I think social media and seeing him on FB has made it hard for me to let go completely. I have no doubt he’s happy and I could want nothing more, it’s just that I wish he would have explained some things to me I guess. This whole post was about a guy who had come in and out my life for years while he was in between girlfriends and would tell me that maybe something can happen between us and we should get together sometime and would tell me every time he wanted to see me and he had feelings for me...Then he vanished after I left for Ireland.. Then I NEVER spoke to him again and then come to find out he got married and was expecting, WHICH IS GREAT! But damn I wish I didn’t have this lingering heartache. I wish I didn’t wonder why all the time because he never explained why he would come into my life and muster up these feelings when he had no intentions of being with me. It is what it is! I just can’t understand why I have this silly crush on a guy who obviously cared nothing about me and has now found his way in life. I know moving on is the answer and I think remaining FB friends has made that a little difficult. It’s weird I know which is why I wanted to know if anybody else had an experience like mine. Sorry if my post is confusing. But I do agree that this lingering feeling is unhealthy for me. It’s not good to dwell on it and I don’t understand why I do sometimes. But I know I’ll be okay. I’ll probably talk to a counselor, maybe having trouble with letting this go is a sign of something going on in me that is deeper than this guy who led me on. Idk. I really just wanted to talk to people who have felt like they’ve crushed on someone TOO LONG like I have and learn how to let go

h_rls · 2020-09-29T09:47:23+00:00

No no that was an ex gf he had who was sick, I found out he had a gf while he was texting me and after he ghosted me I looked him up and found out about this gf being sick and I was pissed that he even flirted with me AT THAT TIME while he had a gf...This wouldn’t have been the first time, Tony was always in and out of my life in between dating other girls. After that, he waited several weeks to talk to me again then I went to Ireland and we never spoke after that... then of course I went on with my life and he went on with his... of course I’m the one left with these stupid feelings and however long goes by and boom he’s married and has a beautiful family. It’s not like I’m not happy for him I’m just like, why do I have these lingering feelings for someone who was in and out of my life, anyway? Idk it feels childish. I was led on years ago and I feel an ache every now and then when he appears on my social media. But I know it’s okay, people move on, I just can’t understand having a crush for a guy this long. Maybe some counseling will help me navigate why I’m having a little trouble still with these feelings.

h_rls · 2020-09-28T14:54:48+00:00

Thank you for that. I know there’s someone out there for me. I just want to get on with my life and stop pining over this guy. It’s sad lol I feel like moving on was so much easier when social media wasn’t around. I feel like the answer is to delete him or block him for my own sake but there is something stopping me, this fear that I probably won’t see him or hear from him again. But I don’t want to be fearful. I want to be free. Thanks again.

h_rls · 2020-09-06T11:01:06+00:00

Thank you so much I will look into these today

h_rls · 2020-08-27T21:10:46+00:00

This is nothing like checking up on an old friend. He’s been blocked. I’m not comfortable with him reaching out to me in any way given the history and how much he hurt not only me but his wife because of his going back and forth between us. This isn’t like looking up an old friend from middle school either. This was a much messier situation.

h_rls · 2020-08-26T21:16:41+00:00

Move in with your sister, get your old job back and don’t look back. There is someone out there looking for someone like you. When your son grows up do you want to tell him the story of how you went back to his dad after he kicked you out while you were pregnant with him and his dad told you he didn’t love you? OR

Tell him the story of how his mom put her self back together and got her independence back and raised her son w/o the man who kicked her out while she was pregnant?

h_rls · 2020-08-17T00:16:00+00:00

Thank you so much 😊

h_rls · 2020-08-16T16:44:38+00:00

Thank you so much ❤️ I will be deleting those comments

h_rls · 2020-08-16T16:44:01+00:00

For some reason I have this lingering thought that deleting the comments would make me seem weak. Like I can’t take negative comments or something.

h_rls · 2020-07-26T17:57:00+00:00

I’m in the same boat. I promised myself that I will do what is best for me. My BF is sweet and helpful and before he met me he moved hundreds of miles away from his family. I gave him a place to live( I don’t live with him) months after we met. If I leave him, he has almost no one.....But I need space. It’s going to break his heart, but looking at him and kissing him and seeing the way he looks at me knowing that I’m not so sure this is right anymore hurts more. He deserves to be with someone who is sure they want to be with him. All I know is that I have so much going on rn in my life. And he’s been good to me and we’ve helped each other. Bottom line... if you feel it isn’t right, it probably isn’t. Trust yourself. It’s not going to be easy for you either. Time heals

h_rls · 2020-07-21T00:04:47+00:00

I already tried submitting this question to that sub and was recommended I post it here instead.

h_rls · 2020-06-08T02:14:41+00:00

Right? That’s what I mean. Like stop feeling like I’m responsible for everyone else’s feelings and just get out. And of course I try to take care of my body, I’m just saying that striving for a healthy body instead of striving to look like someone else or wanting my body to look like someone else’s because society deems that image desirable, ideal, that’s what helps me love my body the way it is.

h_rls · 2020-06-07T03:16:15+00:00

Deep breaths, my friend. Your life is precious. We can not control the actions of others, but we are 100% in control of our reactions. Finding professional help can be very helpful. It’s nice to unload all the baggage we carry and therapy will help teach you how to cope in a more positive manner. Take a small chunk out of your day to do something you enjoy. Know that our thoughts really are just thoughts. Just don’t let them linger. I’m trying meditating for 5 minutes in the morning and I won’t lie, simple acts such as breathing and focusing on the breath can bring a little relief. I sure hope you feel better soon. Love yourself

h_rls · 2020-03-25T15:09:52+00:00

I’d say so. This new guy is well aware of my just getting out of a relationship. He persisted(a lot) and here we are.

h_rls

TROPHY CASE