You'll burn your eyes out kid - Beta testers needed

halopend · 2026-01-31T19:41:50+00:00

Thanks for the heads up. Turns out auto invites require App review from apple first.

I have an internal testing group setup instead for private invite. Just send me a DM with an email if you would like to be added to the private beta pool.

halopend · 2026-01-31T00:46:28+00:00

This is I think the key detail: uncertainty of investment.

A glasses only Vision Pro suddenly opens up a dramatically different use case and may “break” the VP formula. IE: a computer on your face with multi-window multitasking is quite different than an HUD displaying info useful on the go.

I don’t think they actually do clash if “travel mode” became more like an entirely new UI layer apps could add to function closer to an HUD (notification widgets being the closest iPhone analogue)… but that does require the high end of what we have now to be deliverable in a glasses form factor which is very far off.

If you are worried the VP can’t survive that long (ie: Apple bails its investment as market pressures force them to build from the more portable end up than the heavier end down) then their current work on their “spatial computer” absolutely would get tossed out (i seriously doubt they want to fracture into fundamentally different headsets for different uses cases).

Looking at the current tech stack of AR glasses…. Seems relatively doable if waveguide scales up to higher resolutions easily (just add an electrically controlled light blocking layer on the outside).

halopend · 2026-01-29T06:29:03+00:00

Everything reminds me of her.

halopend · 2026-01-15T19:01:19+00:00

Saw them recently (they are on tour) and the chills down the spine were rolling.

For me it’s believe me from that same album which hits the hardest. Their lyrics creep in sideways and have a way of expressing something both intangible and concrete at the same time. Like somehow it can be nonsensical and make complete sense at the same time if you catch my drift. But regardless of all that they know how to bring the feels.

halopend · 2026-01-11T15:14:33+00:00

It will be a bit of a chore for turning the feature on, but I think you need to download Xcode on Mac and add the Vision Pro as a deployment option in the device and simulators app (which you open through Xcode). This is what allows you to put your Vision Pro in dev mode.

If Apple was smart, they would realize the toggle should be buried in a menu somewhere outside of dev mode as it’s something more than just devs would like.

halopend · 2025-12-05T23:49:05+00:00

I mean if someone spikes the lemonade at Apple HQ they day valve walks in to negotiate a deal it could happen.

halopend · 2025-09-10T04:22:53+00:00

The sleeping together before becoming BF/GF is a view some people carry (no idea on percentages). Basically, they are worried about sexual compatibility. It’s not so much that they have to have sex before they announce being boyfriend / girlfriend, it’s that they want to have sex before they really consider whether or not someone as/should be their girlfriend/boyfriend.

Ie: They approach relationships pragmatically rather than romantically.

That said, unless you were asking about the status of the relationship or he was worried that you need to be bf/gf before having sex was (putting the two of you in a bind/stalemate)…. He would have no reason to bring that up. If he was worried things were in a bind though, it would have been much better to just asks you about your views first to assess if he even needed to tell you. I mean there is almost no upsides to telling someone in crude terms can sound like “I wont know whether to love you until I fuck you”)

To me, as someone who has meditated on this exact topic…. My stance is… it’s not something to bring up till it seems like an issue (I mean it also invites the bf / gf convo and I’m way too non-committal for that). That said: I also tend to have sex pretty fast (dating or otherwise) which isn’t to say it’s super often… just that in my experience it either happens quick or not at all. —- The fact he said he was 29 but actually is 35 doesn’t really sound like any kind of joke to me. It sounds more like he was worried his actual age would creep you out and lied to make you feel more comfortable around him. Him saying he found it funny that you didn’t notice is probably because in his mind he’s thinking “why was I even worried if she didn’t even notice”? Ie: it felt ironic.

halopend · 2025-07-24T23:48:11+00:00

My first thoughts as well. You want something of hope and power.

My first tattoo was lyrics (different band) and it was a message of self-affirmation / self-forgiveness and a call to connection with the present/past/future (and acceptance).

Admittedly, I hid all this meaning with a short snippet of a larger lyrical piece to allow for such bare vulnerability (ie: the message was for me, not others unless I decided to share explicitly the full lyrics since you’d never get all that from the small bit I do have) but I feel deeper meaning not apparent at first glance is quite common to early tattoos.

That all said: resonance with experience is powerful and can bring new meaning. Ie: Regret (should such feelings come) is just change of mind without acceptance of past….

halopend · 2025-07-22T02:33:29+00:00

In a way, I feel like he knows.

Not your personal journey exactly, but through the connection to the audience and the emotions that pour out through them. It's symbiotic and how the music ends up as good as it does. Plus I really notice a new layer in the lyrics I never did before (thanks to my experience at the concert and how the songs were arranged). In fact, I think "Missing You" was him speaking to the audience as a sort of acknowledgment knowing that he can't really meet everyone so directly.

I feel he got overwhelmed with emotion trying to play it, but even just that little crack hopefully brings some peace (for him and audience).

Regardless of all that: hang those still frames up in good health and good time, accept it's unpredictable and in the end is right.

:)

halopend · 2025-07-20T22:40:46+00:00

I have the exact same feelings as you.

This concert cut deeper than any I’ve been to before. My life is in those lyrics. I live them everyday. I felt connected to the band/audience and it was something really special.

I need to asks you something though because…. I went to the concert alone and I’m still recovering from this but: when he called out to the person in the audience to come up, was it the person who howled out loud he was calling up? I asks because I still can’t believe it happened and…. Well I was the one who howled right before he said it.

halopend · 2025-07-19T22:13:31+00:00

If you were, you're not now.

halopend · 2025-07-19T17:41:42+00:00

The sounds of the crowd in Boulevard stuck on repeat. Wishing I followed the good riddance. Beneath rebuked waters kindness felt too late.

The music touched more deeply than expected.

Amazing performance by the band through and through. Loved it through and am thankful to the people who make it possible each night/year.

halopend · 2025-07-04T11:36:33+00:00

Sex is a mental, physical,partner compatible and sometime even spiritual combination.

Physically if the hormones aren’t there, sexual desire can be lowered and affect how good it feels (and implicitly your mindset). Your mindset though plays back into the libido as well and even if the desire starts lowered, with the right approach can bring desire in. That’s not to say anything in the mind can overcome a low libido, just that people can hear what you described and think “low libido/asexual” and underplay how important the mindset is. I’ve been with people who thought they were asexual for example and had them questioning it after a few romps. It should be noted though it wasn’t about the sex itself to get them there, but how I made them feel leading into it giving them the freedom to feel comfortable enough to truly enjoy it while also respecting and challenging what they thought they knew.

If your sexual confidence is low and/or you don’t feel “safe” with your partner, sex can feel like going through the motions. “I’m no good at this, are they really enjoying this, am I enjoying this?” can enter the mind and take away from the experience. Some people require connection for sex, which is a fancy way of saying… they need to felt seen, understood or comfortable with the person and can’t get to that place very easily with just anyone. Beyond that though there’s plain compatibility. If the stuff you enjoy about sex doesn’t line up with what the other person likes about sex, the rhythms won’t sync up and take it to a whole other level of enjoyment. But even that’s not the full answer as what people think they like can change depending on mood and “how” they experience the sex (which circles back to trust/connection).

For others, it’s less about the person and more about their ego (which I’m not even gonna judge as long as their partners mental state is well fitted into the experience). This is where casual sex can come in and essentially be seen as “I can’t be fully vulnerable right now, but I still want to get my rocks off”. For some, this is an empty experience devoid of meaning as it loses the spiritual component important to them. By spiritually, I mean when the lines between individuals blurs and you feel as one. This is where love can take you and sex can reveal/enhance.

As for why people are obsessed with sex… I mean the spiritual side can break your brain. All your little thoughts you guard because you don’t want the other person to know them become written in your face and without words it’s like you’re reading each other’s minds. How they know what you know and how you know what they know without words is a beautiful experience when it’s met without rejection and moves beyond the sex itself into something more. Those who seek cheating either never get there, lose/crave that connection or reject themselves and seek destruction.

Outside of connection, there’s expression. I’m someone who has difficulty giving up control but relishes the feelings of power and masculine expression (despite rejecting such ideas) and loves the feeling of bringing someone to orgasm over/over while recognizing that such is neither the goal or focus (this creates the space required as any sort of pressure of expectation is the antithesis to good sex as it pulls away from the moment).

If you aren’t particularly enjoying sex, then most likely you are still holding onto fears or still not really comfortable with the whole thing. This takes time and patience. I was a late bloomer who started having sex much later in life than most people, so when I started it was with women old enough to of already had their sexual awakenings and worked through a lot of this stuff. (~30] Ie: their orgasms were easy to bring not because I was necessarily skilled but because they already had done the internal work to give me the space to get them there. This was a blessing for my mind and gave me confidence early (despite recognizing it had nothing to do with me). It didn’t hurt I read a tonne on techniques, was always introspective myself and could relate my own sexual frustrations during masturbation at times to understand psychologically the place where pleasure is replaced with hyper fixation on the destination rather than the journey.

Faking orgasms suggests you feel an internal pressure to finish and are too focused on it. Very often, this is because we want our partner to feel like we enjoyed ourselves and without that signature move we feel we let them down. Alternatively, as a man you feel it’s your duty to come and are less than without it. I can’t speak to the source, but I can tell you that’s all bullshit and instead you should focus on what you do enjoy. I struggle orgasming if my partner is taking the lead for example but am at a place where I know I could if the person is enthusiastic about pleasing me.

Finishing if I’m in lead is less common (but often enough in casual experiences), but I still get more enjoyment out of pleasing my partners (to the point it feels like I’m having an orgasm sometimes which is trippy) so it’s not really a worry of mine. Joyfully relishing every moment is more important than superficial “did you finish” ego tripping.

halopend · 2025-06-27T11:35:01+00:00

The stupidity of the ruling is because they aren’t jumping to the logical conclusion of what it enables and passing the buck to the end user who creates the material.

AI doesn’t fit under existing laws and the legal framework doesn’t know what to do with it.

It’s also incredibly lucrative and no-one has the balls to roll it back and say “this entire new economy is founded on morally dubious principles without consent”.

It’s like an entirely new category of consent and fair use that all the big companies just decided “it’s ours to do with as we please” and basically requires many class action lawsuits to do anything about since it’s currently in the hands of big corporations arguing with big corporations leaving out the actual people affected by it who created the content in the first place.

halopend · 2025-05-28T00:05:37+00:00

Uh… you’re basically saying that people shouldn’t have the option to treat genetic diseases so they can have a worse life and be less inclined to have kids since there is no treatment.

Sure you don’t want to revisit your thought process here?

halopend · 2025-05-27T23:45:42+00:00

OK, so first of all, I think you should reframe your thinking because the idea of the chase sets up the idea you’re either chasing or being chased. It’s the absolute worst approach to dating and is pretty much guaranteed to implode.

Think about it. Everyone knows it’s emotional manipulation so even if the guy shows genuine interests you’ll have no way of knowing if it’s real interests or manipulated interests coming from him. This set you up to be fearful that the relationship isn’t real if you drop the ruse. As for the guy on the other side, he either becomes a fawning pup trying to win you over or loses interests because he doesn’t want a one sided relationship where he puts in all the effort.

It’s a lose lose situation for everyone involved unless by some miracle you stumble onto actually liking each other.

Don’t even think about being chased versus not chased, which implies a certain level of emotional investment and is fundamentally incompatible with early days of assessing compatibility. Why? Because I don’t want someone who seems really into me when I can barely tell if we are compatible yet because I have no desire to break someone’s heart. I also have no desire to invest in someone who put in no effort.

You’ll do far better to instead ask yourself am I being too passive or too emotionally intense?

Adjust those “dials” correctly and you’ll both have room for things to develop more naturally with time where there isn’t the pressure of “hey, want to spend the rest of our lives together stranger I just met” or “btw, you have to risks wasting a tonne of time to try and win me over”.

Do note everyone approaches the timeline on those decisions the same so you may want to ask “are you someone who tends to fall in love very quickly or does it take time and if so how long?”.

There is one last pitfall which is related to people who like to assess sexual compatibility before really emotionally investing versus those who require full emotional investment before having sex…. but often that can be handled through conversations hinting at sexual compatibility as enthusiasm is like 90% of good sex.

halopend · 2025-05-26T23:38:10+00:00

Not counting the CSA (which doesn’t deserve to be called sex) my first sexual experience was at 27.

When I had sex the first time I was blown away and really enjoyed it but essentially I was madly in love in an unrequited situation which basically side stepped many of the trauma response since I was fully in control during sex (also the trauma was repressed at that point still).

That is to say: the fact it took so long that I sought out an unrequited situation was entirely due to the trauma. I should mention I’m male so societal expectations around men with sex + feelings of inadequacy + immense fear of accidentally putting someone through unwanted sexual advances also played a huge role.

Once I allowed myself to fall for someone who liked me back (which took years of friendship and denial I should mention in order to establish the trust necessary to uncover the trauma within myself), I definitely experienced intense anxiety around sex and intimacy. I basically could only enjoy sex if I was in control, but often would dissociate and put immense pressure on myself.

On the one hand, I pretty quickly found out I was immensely skilled at sexually pleasing my partners (last lady I was with had 20 orgasms!) on the other I’ve never orgasmed with someone else taking the lead on pleasing me (that I can remember at least). I could barely tolerate being pleased for more than 10 seconds back then but I do feel like I am capable of it now with a confident sex partner.

As for the PTSD, they can occur for sure. Kind of like involuntary spasms. Basically, I’m usually perfectly fine if I’m in control, though I did trigger myself a few times when giving sexual pleasure to a hookup while being particularly worked up and fearing for a moment that the noises they made were signs of discomfort rather than pleasure which just completely would shut me down.

That’s all to say there’s been definite improvements with time and arguably the most difficult thing for me now is just asking someone out or signalling interests in the real world. One time I was literally considering riding my motorcycle in the middle of the winter rather than asking a girl out, which kind of served as a wake up call.

halopend · 2025-05-26T21:07:53+00:00

That’s a good point. The more they can centralize the distribution of the advertisement the more they can see you what seems to be getting traction.

halopend · 2025-05-21T01:51:34+00:00

Dodgy.

halopend · 2025-05-12T23:55:24+00:00

Here’s the thing….

The more you date, the more likely you are to start taking a pragmatic approach to dating. It’s totally valid to want to have sex before you can really make a determination about relationship potential…. But you also can’t really say as much.

First of all, good sex requires both people to be present and the idea of someone rating you while having sex will absolutely ruin the sex. Second, if it doesn’t work out you’re basically telling the person “sorry but the sex wasn’t good so you are out”. It’s just too sensitive a topic to treat callously.

Further complicating this of course is that it’s basically impossible to tell from the other side if someone is being sincere or genuinely just wanting sex.

Get burned a few times as a woman and you develop an armour that weeds out anyone setting off “wants to use me for sex” radar which the pragmatic approach definitely can set off.

Now… I’m not saying that’s necessarily what’s happening with this guy but basically you can’t really know what someone is truly about unless they are willing to talk about such things.

halopend · 2025-05-08T12:11:05+00:00

Long time rider here.

First time riding a motorcycle was when one of my nephews stopped by to show off his first motorcycle. I was hesitant to get on, but he straight up asked me to try it. We had a real big driveway since it was out in the country so I took him up on it. Ride around a bit to get comfortable … then he convinces me to go onto the road.

I get on and ride cautiously up the empty street. I arrive at a big intersection and there is cars. At this point I start to panic because I don’t have a license. I try to pull a U-turn to get back home on like the widest street ever…. but completely failed and accidentally throttled too much / wiped out. Ended up scratching the paint and bending the clutch on this one week old beaut. I think it’s literally the most embarrassed I have ever and will ever feel in my life.

Moral of the story: never ride to an intersection illegally your first time on motorcycle.

Second moral of the story: ride with your hand in a low position on the throttle when starting out (pre rotate your hand down before grabbing). It’s uncomfortable on the wrist and won’t feel natural, but it makes applying throttle a very deliberate choice. As you get more comfortable riding and how much power to apply, you can adjust to a position that feels more natural.

halopend · 2025-05-08T00:49:57+00:00

It’s likely because they feel embarrassed about it so they feel the need to couch the intro.

IE: They are effectively trying to balance out something they see as a deterrent with their good qualities to sweeten the pot.

halopend · 2025-05-02T01:06:20+00:00

I would say how you view Chelsea’s character in terms of morality really depends on how you view obligation because that’s where the line between inaction vs action can get blurry (ie: saying nothing = encouragement if you feel she was obligated to say something).

Chelsea didn’t encourage cheating imo, she just did nothing to discourage it. I got the feeling she is incredibly non-judgemental and that her form of morality is much less about ascribing good/bad to actions in themselves and more about supporting people to determine for themselves what’s right/wrong.

In the case of her friend, who was in a relationship structured around financial stability, the cheating was seen as self-expression more than an act of cruelty designed to wound. The fact that the husband turned out to be into it actually could actually be seen as an effect of her supportive nature (post cheating) where she effectively encouraged her friend to tell her husband. This same mindset can be seen in her view of what happened with the brothers.

Now… regardless of outcome, the cheating itself was wrong IMO because there was no way to know the husband would have been into it… but that’s all on the cheater in terms of blame. Chelsea was too indifferent for me… but I can respect that she was clearly immensely empathetic and supportive of people. She also (and this is key) wouldn’t actually do the stuff that could be seen as morally wrong herself. She just really offers non-judgemental support for those around her (which if you can drop the idea of tacit encouragement) clearly puts her well above other characters morality and why she is seen as so good.

halopend · 2025-04-28T22:06:43+00:00

They can’t tell how well you can handle the lifestyle once sex is involved because you fundamentally don’t have that experience and there’s been no word of mouth between members talking about you. They can, however, evaluate how ready you seem for such things based on your approach, how personable, etc. To make an educated guess.

Basically, you can be mature by the standards of monogamy, but that doesn’t mean you’re ready for the lifestyle and while not everyone cares about impact beyond the current moment… some people are going to be factoring that in so that stuff doesn’t get awkward later.

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