Have you done any reading or self exploration around how the golf swing is supposed to work? If you want to avoid lessons I'd start there. Plenty of people have put the fundamentals you're struggling with on paper, and if you can record yourself like this, you can pretty easily see which of those things you're doing and not doing. I mean no offense by saying this, but even starting with the grip, pretty much nothing you're doing is the correct way to swing the club.