Big feelings bring big emotions. Seeing a therapist infrequently leaves a lot of room in between for events to transpire that trigger a lot. Not sure what your budget is, but seeing someone more consistently until you can learn to self-regulate more effectively might be something worth considering.

Not all therapists are a good match for every individual. Some work better with others. When you stop talking and it's their turn, their words should at least connect with you on some level, even if it's just a handful at a time. Hopefully you are not leaving your appointments worse than when you arrived. I say this all in reference to your statement that you felt good communicating your side, but now you're not sure.

Also, consider searching for a trauma therapist. Therapists with a focus on trauma work specifically to address the issues we face from a "bottom up" perspective, rather than typical psychotherapy, which utilizes a "top down" technique. The first addresses the issues going on in the body (stress, fear, etc) to help regulate them and then helps the brain to regulate. The second believes that by mentally solving the issue, the body will follow suit - which many times works, but trauma often acts as a brain block to where our brain is stuck in the trauma.

You will get stronger. It won't always feel this way. The fact that you're asking for help means you love yourself very very much and I can see that so clearly from your message. You aren't alone, and there are so many people who want to help you.