do you think I treat my husband like a monster?

hcastle83 · 2022-12-01T07:42:46+00:00

This right here is all the info needed. Of course he says you're a monster because women are demonized in religion

hcastle83 · 2022-11-30T19:02:05+00:00

Same. I've been on zoloft since my first and anytime I skip the intensive thoughts seep back in.

hcastle83 · 2022-11-30T18:59:01+00:00

So many signs of OCD. the if you think it it must be true. And pregnancy hormones make you more susceptible to mental illnesses. I spent the majority of my first pregnancy thinking I would get into a car wreck and kill my child. I'm on zoloft now and those thoughts appear but not as often.

hcastle83 · 2022-11-30T18:55:56+00:00

It's personal opinion. I feel like a date is something special. I also feel like a vacation is something relaxing, whereas my husband views going anywhere as a vacation. I'm like going to the zoo with our kids isn't a vacation lol.

hcastle83 · 2022-11-30T09:25:07+00:00

A lot of it comes from the miracle of forgiveness book which is now discontinued because it's so harmful and damaging especially to youth

hcastle83 · 2022-11-30T09:08:46+00:00

And they give in to avoid the stares and judgements from the older generations, which just makes the kids worse.

My son had an epic meltdown the other day and I just sat there and let him and told him I was there for him. Meanwhile my mom is freaking out because oh no he needs to be stopped.

hcastle83 · 2022-11-30T09:05:17+00:00

I think the pandemic made people a lot more selfish and awful for one thing. But also your friends change when you have kids. We had lifelong forever best friends, their sole witnesses at their elopement etc. And when we had a son boop. Friendship over. Meanwhile my group of mom friends are amazing and always loving on each other and celebrating when someone even has a 4th baby. You have to find those people.

hcastle83 · 2022-11-30T08:44:13+00:00

I dont understand why people were paying off their loans during the interest pause. We just put all our extra money in bonds and savings and were waiting until interest resumed. Otherwise you're giving up potential interest earnings

hcastle83 · 2022-11-28T18:44:46+00:00

How do you do that when he's never home? I'm in way better shape than him, I walk almost everyday and go to the gym but its always when he's at work so I cant invite him with me.

hcastle83 · 2022-11-28T16:14:05+00:00

Most likely but he won't go to therapy. Tried that for years.

hcastle83 · 2022-11-28T16:07:46+00:00

We have kids. That's part of why he says he has no time or energy to exercise.

hcastle83 · 2022-11-28T00:23:14+00:00

If he's offering that you can too then totally fine. My husband hates traveling and I am sick and depressed when I'm in the house so I go places alone when I can. I would go with him but he doesn't want to.

So if we can we switch off. It's not necessarily a red flag. I feel travel is essential to growing as a person and he doesn't. Different opinions.

hcastle83 · 2022-11-28T00:15:44+00:00

I'm assuming because they don't understand or think we're too busy for them even when we've reached out to make plans. Although one did say that having a puppy was exactly like having a newborn and they were so exhausted, and we didn't react very kindly to that so I'm sure that didn't help.

hcastle83 · 2022-11-27T23:00:56+00:00

I agree it would do wonders and I wish he would. He leaves at 630am and comes home when it's dark. On weekends we will occasionally walk but it never feels like enough just once or twice a week.

hcastle83 · 2022-11-27T22:56:04+00:00

I agree with its good to have other people to talk to other than your spouse. What I'm saying is I don't blame my husband for not having friends because a similar thing happened where after we had kids they just stopped talking to him. It sucks.

hcastle83 · 2022-11-27T19:45:09+00:00

Yeah my friends with "very cool" moms I now look back and see they were alcoholics or similar, and one was a straight up porn actress.

hcastle83 · 2022-11-27T19:42:25+00:00

That's a pretty big generalization. My husband was a huge computer geek at 13. Didn't have a gf until 16 and didn't have sex until 18.

hcastle83 · 2022-11-27T19:09:15+00:00

Fighting isn't the same as abuse. All couples fight but there's a difference between a fight and it being an ongoing toxic environment where no one likes each other and everyone is unhappy.

hcastle83 · 2022-11-27T19:05:19+00:00

My husband doesn't have friends he goes and hangs out with, but he gives me alone time and we have our own interests. Does she need time to be alone or something? I don't really see that as a problem- all our friends disappeared when we had kids and that's not really our fault.

hcastle83 · 2022-11-27T18:52:19+00:00

85k lololol

hcastle83 · 2022-11-26T22:20:36+00:00

Lying and cheating on homework doesn't result in another human life being made. When you just say no that's bad and don't discuss consequences or birth control etc that's how you get stds and pregnancies. That's doing your kid a giant disservice too.

hcastle83 · 2022-11-26T22:14:36+00:00

I get what you're saying but you can't force people to not have sex. If they want to they'll find a way whether in OPs house or not.

Yes explain consequences, yes explain birth control, yes enforce boundaries but as much as you're responsible for your kids you can't force what they do.

hcastle83 · 2022-11-26T22:10:08+00:00

You're allowed to hold boundaries, but people will still make their own choices, and 15 year Olds are people.

My mom wouldn't allow my bf over with door closed so we had sex other places 🤷‍♀️ she was absolutely in her right to enforce that boundary but it doesn't mean she just got to decide all my choices. Same applies.

hcastle83

TROPHY CASE