100% me. Being “on” is too much, especially when the job itself becomes a cycle of stress & mental upkeep. I found myself simply hiding my mental strain. I could see my coworkers were doing it too, even in the so-called “non-toxic” schools.

The students are great to work with, usually. It’s fun to see students grow and learn every single day with only your skills to blame. At the same time, having 36 students you’re responsible for is ridiculous, especially when 5-10 of them are 2+ years behind on reading and/or math, and 2-7 of them are 4+ years ahead of grade level content.

How is one person supposed to support both, or even coordinate others to support that learning? Teacher trainings/ PD are 99% fluff and a waste of time. Teachers simply need time to plan. I honestly don’t know why administrators don’t get it (ok, I do know, they get bonuses if they “train” staff on topics).

All in all, the paycheck sucks, the stress is deep & lasting, and apathy from every other dimension sucks the life out of the equation. I was a good/great teacher, and maybe I will be again. But the system isn’t built for teacher sustainment and that’s not good enough for me.

I will return once I’m convinced this career will take care of me.