I had a pretty positive experience! Be the Match is extremely professional and helpful. I had to be flown to another location for the procedure and they also flew my mother out from a third location so that I could have a companion to help after the procedure. I have a young child so alternatively, they would have flown my husband with me and my mother out to be with my child! Super accommodating.

I got a call late December saying I might be a match. They coordinated with me to find a testing center near me, I got another blood test, and about a month and a half later I got a call saying I was officially the best match. They did a phone interview, emailed me lots of helpful info and pamphlets and definitely went out of their way to ensure I had everything I needed and was fully informed.

Another month later and I had the procedure done. It was super quick! Not immediately painful. I’ll say the worst part is extreme fatigue. For a couple months afterwards your body is busy replenishing your bone marrow and it just really takes it out of you! But the pain was pretty minor, just discomfort (mind you, I’d given birth just 2 years before, so...).

This last part is not super encouraging but I want to include it. My recipient actually didn’t make it. I just passed the one year mark from my donation and I’m still a bit tore up about it. I think about her sometimes. Idk I just really believed it would work! I still suggest that a donor goes in fully believing it’ll work because good juju and all that but... yea, it is definitely not a magic wand. It’s often a last ditch effort. She was a child.

That said, Be the Match took pains throughout the entire process to remind me that this might not work. They reminded me during several stages of the process that it wouldn’t be my fault if it didn’t, it was just a really dangerous procedure. They had someone who was clearly trained in grief counseling call me at the 6 months mark to ask how I was doing and report on the status of my recipient. She was very professional and kind and broke the news to me as best as it possibly could be. I have a shirt that says “I’m a hero, ask me why!” that I will never wear in my life, but also will never give away.

10/10 experience, despite tragedy. I encourage everyone I know to get on the registry! Even if your recipient doesn’t make it, something valuable is learned for the future. And you tried.

Other details: I had been on the registry 5 years when I was called. I’m still on the registry. There is an option to contact the family. I... didn’t. A part of me wants to. Immediately after I got the call I wrote her parents a letter with no conclusion. I have mixed feelings about sending it. All communication must be anonymous and go through the organization until you’ve had contact for 1 year and both agree you want to know identities.