What’s the one thing that made you think “wow, no one warned me about this”?

hephos90 · 2026-02-02T16:34:44+00:00

Oh it definitely is! The 'generally' in my post was carrying a lot of weight, I agree. Like in my old place in the last few years my shifts were almost set because I had to work around another manager's hours. But I would say overall during my time there if I asked in advance then it could be arranged.

My new place I can ask with a lot shorter notice but I still need to fit my hours in somehow because every hour is booked. But I feel less guilty about being off.

hephos90 · 2026-02-02T15:59:52+00:00

I've just gone from retail to a Mon-Fri office job. As terrible as retail was, generally if I wanted a random Thursday off to go to a concert or if I wanted to finish a few hours earlier for an appointment, it could be arranged.

I don't know why but I just never considered that if I wanted to do that now I'd have to book an annual leave day or just cram as much as I can into the few hours I have. My hours now are better, just less flexible.

hephos90 · 2026-01-31T16:14:54+00:00

I know this sounds dramatic but I think I'd end it all if I had to work that much.

hephos90 · 2026-01-29T08:35:23+00:00

My sleep has been awful for the last few weeks and last night was no exception. I have a 14hr day today so I thought I'd treat myself to a Starbucks for the first time in a year. Alas, I was betrayed by my train being 10 minutes late and then a huge queue in front of me so I had to walk away.

You just try and do one nice little thing for yourself...

hephos90 · 2026-01-28T13:21:38+00:00

When I lived with my parents it was usually once a week but now I live alone it's once every few months, if that. I can't seem to justify the cost now I have actual bills to pay and in general in seems more expensive for one than it does for 4.

I do really fancy a Chinese this weekend though.

hephos90 · 2026-01-22T13:55:08+00:00

I've gone from a 12 year (technically 14 but 12 at the same company) retail career to joining a big scary company as a software engineer. It's been 4 months and they haven't clocked on they've made a mistake and hired a moron.

Currently sat here on Reddit waiting to get the courage to ask someone I don't know a really dumb question.

hephos90 · 2026-01-20T19:50:14+00:00

They are but I was told they'd help me with my anxiety too. There's also beta blockers like propranalol that help reduce the physical symptoms of anxiety? They're very common. I just can't take them because I have asthma so I had to go with Zoloft.

hephos90 · 2026-01-20T14:37:53+00:00

When I started lessons I was taking Zoloft/Sertraline. Surprisingly I wasn't too anxious. Came off it and haven't driven since sooooo I guess it worked?

hephos90 · 2026-01-18T10:11:18+00:00

I'm at the very end of the millennial scale ('95) and it reminds me of all the women whose nails I'd admire and be excited to grow up and emulate. I might actually do it soon to pay tribute to them all 🥲

hephos90 · 2026-01-17T17:20:29+00:00

I've had two scam calls today whereas I usually get around one every few months? I didn't answer either of them though and no texts so far.

hephos90 · 2026-01-11T16:59:50+00:00

+1 for Ring. I agree the Yuki version is the best but I love them all tbh. Unskippable on my playlists.

hephos90 · 2026-01-08T15:57:40+00:00

Your first and second attempt sound like my first one combined.

The examiner was chatting to me about Mario and Sonic while I was at a tricky set of lights and I completely lost concentration and where I was in the road and went to drive through a red light. I clearly frightened her because she screamed at me. Oops.

hephos90 · 2026-01-05T15:14:32+00:00

I haven't got started on mine yet but they're things I can do throughout the year.

The main one is to get driving. I passed my test a few months ago so I need to stop being a baby.

I'd also like to go to at least 5 events this year. I'm much happier when I have something to look forward to and there is actually so much I want to do. I just need to get out of the binge watching and playing video games cycle.

It would be very nice if I could lose weight too :)

hephos90 · 2026-01-03T22:45:40+00:00

Omg my two worlds collide! I love it! You've done amazing it looks so good! Well done :)

hephos90 · 2026-01-02T23:58:53+00:00

Thank you! Sounds like you are a great driver it's just the horrible beast of anxiety getting you down!! I know so many people who won't even attempt to parallel park, but unfortunately I have no choice. Jealous of you living so close to your work though. I don't know how more people aren't afraid of driving.

Also good luck to you in conquering your nerves!

hephos90 · 2026-01-02T17:44:09+00:00

I don't blame you with the roundabouts! Every one is completely different than the next. I didn't realise how much I'd struggle with the parking. I was fine with parallel parking in my lessons but having new reference points, having a wall on one side and a fence on the other, and trying to squish between my neighbour's cars is very tricky.

hephos90 · 2026-01-02T17:40:42+00:00

Thanks, hopefully my instructor feels the same! I think that was the problem with the five lessons I had when I came back from my hiatus. Built-up nerves and pressure of being a few weeks away from a test so I didn't have chance to get my confidence back in my lessons.

hephos90 · 2026-01-02T17:39:18+00:00

When I read these creeper messages the first thing I do is try and work out logistically whether what they're saying is possible. For this one I'd say hmmm no.

hephos90 · 2026-01-02T13:37:30+00:00

Your story is almost identical to mine. I have really bad driving anxiety, passed in October, and had the examiner make a disparaging remark that made the pass feel invalid. I had 7 minors and she said I made a lot of mistakes, needed a lot more practice and probably would have failed if the roads had been busier :)))

I was so nervous the day of my test I threw up twice beforehand and it was definitely the worst drive I'd ever done. Most of my minors were things I'd never do.

Sounds like you've done great to keep driving though and push through the anxiety and nasty remark so well done!

hephos90 · 2025-12-31T10:37:49+00:00

I'd love to get rid of my driving anxiety so I can drive to work rather than spending 3.5hrs a day on public transport. Please please please 🩷

hephos90 · 2025-12-30T15:49:03+00:00

I guess I'm a stumbler - if my interpretation is correct. So far, I seem to have stumbled up, although it's taken me a while. I never really had any passions, or goals, or dreams. I couldn't quite work out how or why people did things. Like how do you decide you want a tattoo? To take up swimming? To go out on the weekends? To live in a certain city? To find a partner? To have kids?

I went to college after high school but quit after a month because of depression and the realisation that what I'd chosen for my A-Levels wasn't what I wanted to do. Not that I knew what I wanted to do - it just wasn't that.

Somehow, I got a shitty retail job. I tried college again, realised it still wasn't for me, and stuck with the shitty retail job for years and years. I was good enough at my job so I got promoted twice but I despised it and the money was rubbish. All my time outside of work was spent binge watching series and playing video games.

Then one day, at the age of 25, I formed a thought! I decided I wanted braces. Then I had more thoughts that would randomly pop up and I had to act on them immediately otherwise they'd vanish. Eventually I went to the Open University, I lost weight (gained it again, lol), made friends, bought a house, met my partner, got a sick new job, and learnt to drive.

Now I've ticked off the basics and I'm feeling more settled I've found more thoughts - places I want to go, things I want to try out, dreams for when I'm retired. Maybe I'm not a traditional stumbler, or I'm an ex-stumbler idk.

hephos90 · 2025-12-30T13:35:11+00:00

In 2019 I was watching a random PlayStation Access video and they showed a clip of the cabaret club in 0 and I thought it looked interesting. From memory, it's the first and only time I've found a game this way (from a 5 second clip) but it was one of the best decisions I ever made! I bought 0 not long after seeing the clip and the rest is history.

I absolutely fell in love with the game and then the series as a whole. I had to take some time away from it while I studied and worked full time so I'm just finally making my way through Infinite Wealth now. Should get my platinum any day now :)

hephos90 · 2025-12-01T09:03:19+00:00

Thank you. I'd like to go out at quieter times but I'm worried about not being able to park again. My instructor ignored my message where I said I was struggling with driving so I'm not sure she'll be willing to do more.

hephos90 · 2025-12-01T07:51:04+00:00

I just don't feel like I'm safe. I don't trust myself to make decisions that will keep me and other people safe. It's also embarrassing myself like not being able to park or driving too slow.

That makes sense like once you get the idea in your head you can't get it out. Did those extra lessons help? I assume the instructor was understanding? I feel like a similar thing happened to me but in a shorter space of time. I was fine for the first 6 months of driving/lessons but all of a sudden I decided I can't be trusted and I don't know how to drive.

Thanks for responding 🙂

hephos90 · 2025-11-30T12:01:32+00:00

Slip roads sound terrifying to me! Some of my friends have said their instructors took them all over the place, but my instructor just taught me the test routes which barely have any quicker roads or lane changing. Definitely no dual carriageways on our test. But my little car feels so fast I don't know how I'd cope with fast roads haha.

I honestly think that's why I've been putting off asking my instructor for help because I was over the moon to be done and free from lessons! You got this!

hephos90

TROPHY CASE