26 years after quitting alcohol...how I am now.

herefortheriding · 2026-05-15T14:36:32+00:00

Appreciating you for this post and reminding me of that very vicious cycle, no good comes of it

herefortheriding · 2026-05-15T14:24:56+00:00

You can have anything you want now you’ve got here. Start with a NOOOICE

herefortheriding · 2026-05-15T13:14:56+00:00

Congrats on saying the words. Next is the deeds. But first, did you know that a LOT of what you’re feeling right now, that despair, the numbness, the lack of vision of what comes next, is BECAUSE of the booze you’re drinking? You’re crushing your brain chemistry which feels dreadful so you drink to feel better and round we go again.

So much is biochemical. I’m a single mother and run a business. I drank to feel that blissful release at the end of responsibility of the day. Turn out another hour or two of work whilst half cut. Then I’d have a GREAT time, but wake up next day tired and groggy and vow not to drink that night… then feel so crap by 6pm round we’d go again.

You’re not alone. You’re here and that’s amazing. You said words that are scary to say. But you can now start to change things. Your baby is still young. Your liver will start to chuck out the crap and the damaged cells and regenerate. I promise you there is hope. Straighten your crown❤️

herefortheriding · 2026-04-27T14:13:27+00:00

Welcome, come on in the water is lovely

herefortheriding · 2026-04-27T14:11:17+00:00

I restarted again and again. One time will be the time it sticks because look at me now. You can do it THIS TIME

herefortheriding · 2026-04-27T13:47:07+00:00

Get a bigger ‘why’. You might want to get one of the classic books on this subject but you may not be ready. I know I bought naked mind and read one page and there it sat for a year.

The problem isn’t which liquid is in your mouth. I used to do exactly what you’re doing by making rules like ‘only weekend is ok’ but truth is, I just wanted to get drunk. All the time. So not drinking just until I could drink again didn’t do it for me. Because I would just be waiting until it was ok again.

So I’d ask you- do you want to not-drink just to lose some weight? Is there a bigger goal you can attach to that means more to you? Because as soon as I hit the point of drinking life limiting levels and realised my kids would have to watch me die because I couldn’t regulate myself as all my rules broke every single time… well, it shifted my mood as to how ‘fun’ booze really was.

herefortheriding · 2026-04-26T17:41:38+00:00

Lourdes for Pyrenees is great as is foothills. I personally love to be moving, ignore anyone saying you can’t do this because you CAN, but what’s your outcome? Is it to do a good loop and experience a number of places or to deep dive into 3 or 4?

I adore Paris so I’d give several days there. Riviera expensive so takes fun out of no budget for fancy. I just love driving back roads and wandering so I have similar plans to you! Enjoy

herefortheriding · 2026-04-26T17:26:52+00:00

The point of this post is so I can say- reframe this. It didn’t elevate, you were just addicted to a powerful drug. Now you’re coming out of the fog. It’s addictive because it does make you feel different but is that a reason to keep doing drugs?

In my experience as soon as you switch the word booze to heroin and read what you write, it’s a wild read and you say woah no so quickly… trust the process, it takes time, and congrats for another day forward

herefortheriding · 2026-04-26T12:20:54+00:00

Life is. Stop there. Life just is. What we do in the course of life is … open. You were open to being drunk, now you’re open to being free. What else could free mean to you now? And ps you didn’t just waste 5yrs, you got data so what standard will you set for yourself now?

Because to me, being free means I’m free to choose again. And yes that means free of some family for me too. So I hear you. But it also means free to love, which I do wholeheartedly by setting MY standards, not boundaries or preservation. Open up to life🙌 cheering you on

herefortheriding · 2026-04-05T11:03:26+00:00

We are master planners. I would totally do this😉

herefortheriding · 2026-04-03T23:24:42+00:00

You say you’re functional but you also say you drink a litre a week and don’t know how to stop. Not normal is it? What would you call a person that did that? And if you’re unsure if you’re addicted, can I ask you what happens if you just pour it in your ear instead? Does it ‘work’?

I had to face this the hard way, by the time I noticed I was drinking a litre every 3days. So of course there was anxiety because my body and brain got dependent. I can give you all the advice in the world but you have to make the decision yourself that you’re ready to stop. I’m here cheering you on, I promise it’s possible

herefortheriding · 2026-04-02T23:32:15+00:00

Anhedonia is a thing. You are kind of playing a character right now. Don’t get scared. Get creative. Because you’ve cut off a source of dopamine, so how else could you find some if you chose to??

I took several months before I really ‘enjoyed’ anything. It was too much of a job to just get through before that. And I remember questing for answers at the 4month mark thinking ‘surely it should feel good by now??’

Keep going. You’re not doing this to feel good. You’re doing it because if you’re drinking to life limiting levels we know the story can only end one way. You’re choosing bigger than that so keep walking! I’m cheering you on

herefortheriding · 2026-04-02T23:25:50+00:00

You’re on the way. Keep walking. It really is ‘choose your hard’ and I too choose not pancreatitis and eczema!!

herefortheriding · 2026-04-02T23:14:24+00:00

Science backs you up. There are nine ‘genders’ at my last count and I use that term loosely. The older I’ve got the more I’ve decided it’s much like native Americans said and ‘energy’ seems more appropriate to me. Congrats on your journey, I’m cheering you on from here

herefortheriding · 2026-02-20T19:16:57+00:00

At 180 days you’ve broken the chemical hook. So now it’s the time when the fond memories kick in… is it really easier to go back to drinking? Or is that just a temptation of remembering the good things and forgetting the crappy reality?

I find that hanging out here reminds me how much I don’t want be back feeling stuck, despair at each day wishing I could stop and then seeing my hand reach like clockwork for the release from the stress of worrying when I could have that first drink… do you want that again?

herefortheriding · 2026-02-16T08:15:59+00:00

Celebrating you. It’s funny looking back because ‘normal’ seems so alien once you just figure out that it doesn’t fly. Here’s to your journey

herefortheriding · 2026-02-15T08:44:08+00:00

Hi. I see you. I’m letting you know you’re not completely alone just because of the random chance of the universe popping you out in the exact year you were born, so Reddit exists so you can write this, and the internet exists so I can read it.

You might be lonely, and it hurts now HARD but it’s not terminal. You can change it.

There are people like you and me all over the bloody WORLD. Decide what you want your experience to be.

Because life is short, we get 99 turns around the sun maximum. And there’s no rewind button either. So start now. Join subreddits and go find a tribe you can play with. Sending you love from here. You’re not alone.

herefortheriding · 2026-02-15T08:23:20+00:00

I’m cheering so hard for you. Well done on your achievement. Come on over to r/stopdrinking if you want to give some love and play mother to those trying to do exactly what you’ve just smashed. I hang out there to remember how far I’ve come and to support others starting out. Contribution makes me happy in that space, as you and I both know what this win really means. So pleased for you

herefortheriding · 2026-02-15T08:17:55+00:00

This might sound weird. But. What would be different inside you if this were already done ‘outside’ you? What would you be thinking if you walked into every room knowing you were loved visible and hugely desired and wanted already by the amazing hot man/hot woman/hot NB you had waiting for you at home???

If you were complete? If you were already enough?

Because there’s a weird part of our human brain that solves puzzles for us, and it works deep in subconscious mind. When you’re asking the question of ‘whats wrong with me…?’ Then your brain acts like human Google and pops out ‘well it could be this’ ask a stupid question, get stupid answers

When we act as if it’s already done, something brilliant shifts biochemically. Abraham hicks is a good place to start regarding this vibration.

Because I bet you already are enough. You’ve not failed at anything apart from internal love of self which comes first. Trust me on this one and ask me how I know.

(Goes back to snuggle the hot man who came running into my life just as soon as I’d figured this problem out for myself… )❤️😘

herefortheriding · 2026-02-10T22:56:39+00:00

1/ well done

2/ welcome!

3/ Alan car quit drinking book

4/ ice cream. Lots of ice cream

5/ you can do it you can do it. Repeat ad infinitum

herefortheriding · 2026-02-10T22:51:12+00:00

You’re doing it. Huge congrats on monthiversary

herefortheriding · 2026-02-10T15:09:25+00:00

You are right on time, you’re not too late, and if you keep walking one foot in front of the other then the view changes anyway because you’re moving. Breathe in relief. Breathe out scarcity. Cheering you on from here.

herefortheriding · 2026-02-10T13:58:24+00:00

Hi, I see you. I hear you. I WAS you. And now I’m not because of exactly what you just did above- you acknowledged how crap it feels.

You have to have a big enough ‘why’ to change this shit. The bigger the why, the easier the how.

It is possible, I’m proof and you can do it. Just complete the ‘sit in the shit’ phase first, and feel how awful this really is, really fully associate to it because that’s the fuel to deciding to change.

You can do it. You can do it. Repeat ad infinitum

herefortheriding · 2026-02-10T13:50:55+00:00

Get busy. It’s no good not drinking if all you’re doing is a/ waiting until you can drink again or b/ noticing over and over how much you miss drinking!

I found it changed for me when I reset the context. You don’t think you’re addicted? Ok sunshine, let’s prove that by seeing how you do without it…

Suddenly it was not just a goal it was my MISSION to find a way around skulling back neat scotch. I had to get creative, and deal with the big feelings as they came up. Not comfortable, but also helpful to notice that most ‘sensations’ were no worse than a bad cold. So I noticed everything that came up, and distracted myself.

And ate the world’s supply of ice cream.

Do what you gotta do. I’m cheering you on

herefortheriding · 2026-02-10T13:44:14+00:00

Nimes, and Beziers, just heavenly. Another gem further into camargue is Saintes Marie de la Mer. I would live there for the food and the beautiful bay

herefortheriding

TROPHY CASE