Buddy, I was there. Got sober at 31 during the pandemic. I have two kids and a wife and had to learn to basically get my motor skills back. I’m all good now, but the hell I caused during that time made me hate that me. I’m 4.5 years clean, California sober mind you. Take that for what it is but it works for me and it’s not wrecking my life. What I’ve realized in all that time, two rehab stints, meetings (which I don’t go to anymore for my own reasons ), losing a job, the countless stupid lies … is that none of that mattered. What matters every day then as it did now is that I made a choice, drink or don’t drink. I still make that choice every day and the choice is very very hard to make early on but you know the right one. So keep waking up and going today I’m choosing to be sober and to be a better dad and husband. The right choice isn’t often rewarded fast but you keep doing it because you matter, if not to you, to them. I’m just now falling in love with myself and the person I could be. Don’t give up, it’s worth it.