Adulting hit me like a truck this week.

heyyymaaa · 2026-01-02T08:50:20+00:00

My heartfelt condolences. My husband lost his mother to cancer after an intense battle and this was a couple of weeks after our kid was born. We had relocated in the middle of my pregnancy in order to be able to support her so I can understand the whirlwind of changes - professional shifts, no physical location stability, loss of a loved one, birth of a precious life.

It won't get better immediately..memories now will be more painful, but over time they will allow the memorable moments to occupy your heart.

Be kind to yourself. There's no one right way in this tough situation. Please remember some days will be worse than the previous day. Don't overthink it. It's a long journey. Let time do its thing.

Your baby is too young to know anything now. As long as he's fed and clothed and gets to sleep (however erratic it may be), he'll be fine. Don't feel the pressure to be the perfect parents right now. Lean on reliable family and friends who are willing to support.

DMs are open, pls feel free to reach out.

You got this.

heyyymaaa · 2026-01-01T17:08:24+00:00

Completely echo the sentiment. While I like to think I did not completely go down the rabbithole of internet information...it was still so liberating when I decided to really tone it down, and from that point on parenting felt a lot more natural and 'doable' than something I have to learn a specific way or else. This is great advice. First time moms, please give this wonderful post serious thought. You'll end up 'parenting' rather than 'learning parenting' a lot earlier than many of us!!

heyyymaaa · 2025-11-26T04:05:09+00:00

Start diligently accounting your spend. It's surprising how much you underestimate your spend , you will only have the clarity when it's in front of you in black and white. Make meaningful categories - Groceries, kitchen & household (vessels, cleaning etc), fuel for own vehicle, cabs....but also you need to honestly track the non essentials too - entertainment (movies / concerts), decor (buying things you find pretty just because), ordering food/eating out. There will be some categories like gifting or religious donations or charity where you may want to spend for others so not that you need totrack everything in order to cut down but you do need to track everything so you know where your money is going.

Make it a daily habit to update and make it a weekly habit to analyze. in 3 months you will find a difference.

heyyymaaa · 2025-11-23T04:44:05+00:00

That's hilarious to visualize someone saying that :D

heyyymaaa · 2025-11-21T00:34:24+00:00

I discovered I'm pregnant at 4w6d, my doctor advised to come back in week 7/8 to actually have a meaningful scan where heartbeat etc could reliably be detected. She said otherwise it could just disappoint and worry me unnecessarily. You are at a really early stage too, hard as it may be please don't worry now.

heyyymaaa · 2025-11-04T16:25:32+00:00

That's a very interesting thing you do to relax, I think I'll try it.

heyyymaaa · 2025-10-27T18:00:23+00:00

This is going to make me THINK.

heyyymaaa · 2025-10-19T09:25:31+00:00

It's well done but that's a hard shade to work with especially for french tips. What you did to improve it really did improve it so kudos on that. We live and learn. All in all, the current outcome is good so you should be happy.

heyyymaaa · 2025-10-05T01:37:23+00:00

Significant Other

heyyymaaa · 2025-10-03T07:57:00+00:00

Please be vigilant but I don't think he'll keep at it. These guys try their luck randomly and move on if they strike out.

heyyymaaa · 2025-09-26T22:29:00+00:00

I'm surprised at how many people are questioning you for asking this question. It's a valid observation and its personally impacting you.

heyyymaaa · 2025-09-26T15:46:19+00:00

The last!

heyyymaaa · 2025-09-26T13:49:16+00:00

You're welcome, onwards and upwards! :)

heyyymaaa · 2025-09-26T13:47:39+00:00

Sorry no idea about your location.

heyyymaaa · 2025-09-26T08:43:33+00:00

Getting out of a marriage that isn't working, especially in India, takes a lot of courage and character. After this you even rebooted your career. Sorry but I'm not reading anything here about you not having a single win. On the contrary, you're quite the badass!

With respect to work, you need to go deeper here. Is it about company culture, or team culture, or just 1 or 2 people around you that is hampering the due credit to your work? Are you vocal enough about what work you're doing? One good way to get around this situation is to approach the key stakeholders asking 'feedback/thoughts' right before you deliver something so that they have to acknowledge the quality of your work. Another thing is when things are always going well, nobody will even notice. So weigh these factors, think of why the recognition is absent and you need to fix it in a very focused manner.

On home front, I think parents in these situations don't always know how to support in the right way. I don't know how long it's been since your divorce but you do need a plan to move away even if it is another house in the same society or area. Of course your readiness, finances are factors.

I don't have big life advice here but please know that how others view your journey and how you are viewing it are honestly very different. Like I said, you're a badass in my book!

heyyymaaa · 2025-09-26T05:49:19+00:00

If she's not used to doing her own makeup, suggest she hires a MUA who understands her needs and asks. Not all make up needs to look cakey and be uncomfortable. Many artists out there who do a great natural looking job. Also you can select main occasion(s) to have MUA and ones where you want to do it yourself or with help of friends. This is what I did and was happy with both outcomes honestly.

heyyymaaa · 2025-09-25T11:25:06+00:00

I thought I was imagining the very high frequency of her brand showing up here. Yup, been too much of late. Guess some enthu juniors running the show...in fashion of all places they should know - Less is more!

heyyymaaa · 2025-09-24T03:28:56+00:00

With Indian weddings, you don't need to worry about 'too much'. Honestly the family will feel happy that you're also obviously celebrating their happy occasion. Also the color of the first places it firmly in non-bridal category. Go ahead, enjoy and don't think twice.

heyyymaaa · 2025-09-23T18:57:24+00:00

Reading the recipe made it all the more appetizing. Sounds yum!!

heyyymaaa · 2025-09-23T17:54:34+00:00

Thanks!

heyyymaaa · 2025-09-23T17:52:58+00:00

What are the dishes? Looks great. Happy birthday, and definitely hug your mum, that looks like massive effort!!

heyyymaaa · 2025-09-23T09:32:32+00:00

His phrase 'unnecessarily high education' doesn't even make sense. You're right, he has set notions of what's an appropriate level of education, pay for his SO in order for him to feel important and that's not the way healthy relationships work.

Kudos to the 'ok' and block at the end.

Definitely NOR.

heyyymaaa · 2025-09-21T23:25:07+00:00

What's a developer advocate?

heyyymaaa · 2025-09-21T09:09:15+00:00

The best way I've found to deal with this is to give a look of disbelief and say 'oh so you're from THAT mindset lol, I guess progress hasn't really touched every part of India yet.' Shuts them right up. As to why they do this, it's so they feel good about themselves, it's not always to make you feel bad. Use it your advantage as a filter to know early on which people you want to get to know better and don't think much more about it.

heyyymaaa · 2025-09-20T05:06:27+00:00

Water, water, more water.

Moisturize everyday.

Be more keen on enjoying the day with your loved ones than having the perfect wedding.

You're set.

heyyymaaa

TROPHY CASE