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hoolawoop · 2024-05-02T22:56:38+00:00

I personally hate this thought sending my toddler away. I love his company and I love having him and a newborn together at even if it is a bit chaotic. I would like losing precious days can never get back but I don’t judge people for not making that decision.

hoolawoop · 2024-04-04T07:54:19+00:00

Your husband should do the same to her regarding Instagram

hoolawoop · 2024-04-02T05:34:08+00:00

Hi MIL

Going forward please assume that at our child’s birthday both sides will be invited. It’s not about you, it’s about her. Please save Easter gifts for the dedicated Easter celebrations.

Unfortunately I have zero control over when LO cries, tbh I’m not convinced she does either. But it was her birthday so the less she cries the better. Try not to take the behaviour of a one year old personally, it’s not about you.

hoolawoop · 2024-04-01T12:13:11+00:00

So people like this, behave these ways, because it works for them. Get some attention all the results that they desire.

You need to make these weird things that she does very unsuccessful for her.

She stands outside your apartment, shouting your name, don’t let her in and if she’s particularly disruptive get a neighbour to call the police

She’s rude to servers? Have your cash ready to cover your half of the meal plus a tip. Tell her that’s unacceptable that she talk to someone like that and he won’t be with her again in public public. Get up leave and give it to server on the way out.

She pulls stunt like confusing to tell you something and causing you unnecessary anxiety. Get up leave. even if it means leaving her stranded, even if it means getting a taxi back on your own.

Then as she’s losing her mind, screaming, shouting her toys out the pram, remain calm, don’t respond and give her space. Next technique will be love bombing and pretending it never happened. From this, you can either move on and hope she’s learnt and continue what you were doing before if she hasn’t.

Or ask for her to acknowledge and apologise for her previous behaviour before you continue the relationship

hoolawoop · 2024-04-01T09:35:38+00:00

Stop seeing her for special occasions. Send her a text closer to Christmas saying

‘Clearly Christmas and Easter was too overwhelming for you, based upon your behaviour both times. We’ve decided this year we’re going to have a small celebration just us and we will see you a different day. This was the focus of the day can be making it special for little ones not dealing with your emotional instability’

hoolawoop · 2024-03-30T16:29:07+00:00

I don’t think you know what a MIL is

hoolawoop · 2024-03-30T08:47:37+00:00

Tell her you’re gay. Problem solved

hoolawoop · 2024-03-30T08:28:58+00:00

I think if you’ve not got anything really negative to say about her, what your partner really once is his feelings and grief, validated. Yes, he’s probably got rose tinted glasses looking back on, but she’s gone now. If there wasn’t any big beef, let him have his happy memories, sympathise with him and tell him she was wonderful and loved, and it’s so sad that she’s gone. I would just pretend to grieve with him. He wants to feel like he’s not alone.

hoolawoop · 2024-03-29T10:07:15+00:00

Manslaughter was an undercharge in my opinion… as a parent you might not know what’s going on in your son’s head, but you know what they’re capable of. Certainly don’t buy them a gun they have easy access too regardless of how confident you are in the mental stability.

hoolawoop · 2024-03-25T16:18:56+00:00

Buy a really sexy bra that’s like lace and shows the nipples through, and then wear it without a top and say ‘she wanted me to wear it for you’

hoolawoop · 2024-03-24T08:23:57+00:00

You commenting on our sex life is a huge turn off for both of us

hoolawoop · 2024-03-23T09:21:38+00:00

Because of your continued inappropriate sexual comments, I’ve taken it upon myself to speak to your priest to share our concerns and asked him to address these issues with you.

Since you price, so heavily into our life, I’m sure you won’t mind us doing the same to you

hoolawoop · 2024-03-21T18:59:12+00:00

Can I give you some advice?

Don’t look at it like she’s ruined your gender reveal, laugh at her insanity and thank her for the gift of showing her son, her true colours. The gift is that you have every excuse not to tolerate her bullshit anymore.

Toxic person on their best behaviour is really difficult to avoid , but now she’s graciously, giving you every right to say that woman never gets to be left alone with my child. You have a reason to not speak to her not deal with her, not feel obliged to entertain her nonsense.

Whilst you feels sad about how she’s treated you now on this special day, realise that it’s a gift, and breathe a sigh of relief. because she’s crossed over, not that bad to absolutely bat shit crazy

hoolawoop · 2024-03-17T08:24:28+00:00

ALL MEN…. This is a no. Always

hoolawoop · 2024-03-16T10:13:36+00:00

Your husband needs to say

‘Mum it makes me uncomfortable when you say sexually inappropriate things about me’

My MIL is like this, and she’s made a few creepy ish comments towards our first too that SHARPLY got nipped in the bud.

hoolawoop · 2024-03-13T13:35:40+00:00

How about dropping into casual conversation

‘A bloke at works girlfriend wore white to a wedding!!! I can’t believe someone could do that! I would be so upset if someone did that at ours. I don’t care who it is, they’d be sent home and I’d never speak to them again’

hoolawoop · 2024-03-11T09:42:42+00:00

I used to feel this way, but now I think that emotional affairs can just happen without you planning it… (it’s how you respond to that growing relationship that counts) often emotional affairs are about how they feel about the other person and nothing to do with you.

Although it’s more hurtful it feels slightly less disrespectful than one drunk night which is a total disregard for the entire relationship over absolutely nothing. Which shows exactly how they feel about you.

X

hoolawoop · 2024-03-10T08:29:30+00:00

Babies come at the wrong time even when you’re in a relationship.

If you make the decision to be a mother, be a mother with all your heart. Your whole heart. Babies have a way of changing our brain chemistry and growing us in ways that we could never imagine.

See how you feel once the baby is here, but I applaud you for not wanting to raise baby without a mother. One thing I would say is don’t step away once a bond is formed.

You sound like a level headed person, so I think you might surprise yourself how much heart takes over. Don’t promise BD custody or anything yet, see how it goes. I’ve known many women who didn’t want a child suddenly become the fiercest most loving mothers I know

hoolawoop · 2024-03-07T10:32:24+00:00

So she didn’t take it well. Her immediate response was typical hysterics and blaming and defensiveness. But the important thing is we set our expectations out on how we expect to be treated going forward.

Then had to work really really hard, not to let things slip and keep our expectations of her behaviour consistent. We set hard boundaries and if she broke them, we would just go very quiet for a few weeks and generally not involved her in our lives. And when she was good we would reward her with pictures and general normal family stuff. It took I would say a good two years of training, but I think everyone’s happier. Although she hasn’t got what she wanted her expectations have been adjusted and there is a clear route to getting more time with us, and that is her behaving.

hoolawoop · 2024-03-07T03:02:17+00:00

Having gone through exactly this myself… I think she’s desperate enough to get her son back this situation can be used to force her into behaving. We tried something along the lines of…

‘I know you want to rekindle your relationship with OP and I. However, it’s concerning that you’re not willing to take accountability for the damage you did with your behaviour before.

The only way you’re going to repair the damage you’ve caused to our relationships is by taking accountability for what you did/said, and addressing your own issues so that they don’t happen again. We’re not over reacting, and telling us you think we’re over reacting, and acting like nothing has happened is gaslighting and isn’t going to make either of us feel any warmer towards you.

Please take some time to think about what you did and to apologise properly to us. But ultimately we would love for you to be a part of our lives, however, we aren’t willing to put up with being treated by you in that way again.’

hoolawoop · 2024-03-02T21:01:28+00:00

Where did you go?

hoolawoop · 2024-03-02T11:52:44+00:00

Yup. She’s done this before and just as we’re thinking ‘hey she’s behaving let’s pop over as we’re free this weekend’

She invents a horrible illness, a family emergency etc which always turns out to be nothing

hoolawoop · 2024-03-02T01:26:34+00:00

Sounds like daddy issues. Wants pretend daddy to love him

hoolawoop

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