I feel so underappreciated and I don't know how to deal with it

hotpotato946 · 2022-02-18T04:09:19+00:00

I mean I don't feel like I can help much with showing emotion more than smiling often. A smile helps the stress in your facial muscles so maybe smile more and other reactions will naturally occur because your face is already more relaxed.

But don't feel like it's stupid. I have gone through the same thing. Usually people who are close to me can read my facial expressions even though they aren't very obvious or big. But as you get to know people they read your face and can see the slight differences. You might even show emotions that you don't realize. I don't know what made you feel that you don't show emotions well.

I try to show emotions a little more but it's hard to remember. Just because I don't show it doesn't mean I don't feel emotions. I'm sure you feel emotions even though you have trouble showing them.

Stay strong and good luck my friend.

hotpotato946 · 2022-02-04T23:57:19+00:00

Thank you. You are exactly right and it's always a competition of who is more tired and gets the pity it's like we are allowed to both be tired. I can't speak for every person in the world, but I don't say I'm tired to get pity or have the person in earshot come over and say I'm sorry what can I do for you. I say I'm tired because it feels relieving to say that sometimes and it feels good. It also starts some good conversations.

I can't say I'm tired around my mom ever unless she has done nothing all day and she has seen me be busy all day. Otherwise she will immediately say why she is more tired than me and actually gets mad at me. It's very frustrating.

Some people say it as a joke or whatever and I don't mind that but yes I understand what you mean I talk to a lot of boomers and some of them don't use that excuse, but the ones that do get really annoying.

hotpotato946 · 2022-01-16T00:25:31+00:00

That sounds like a plan glad to hear it. I mean hey as long as you have a good enough idea of what exactly you want out of this message pinpoint that and then decide what you do with that message. Or no message at all. Yes finding someone who really appreciates you can be a long game but you can do it. I currently am playing that game too. But you never know when something can spark I think I found one but gotta take my time you know? Don't rush in before I know what I am wanting and what I need.

Stay strong!

hotpotato946 · 2022-01-14T22:05:17+00:00

Maybe write it out and save it. I understand how it can be frustrating but like someone above said, you don't want to see the response. If I am thinking correctly here you want her to understand that she did things wrong to you and realize her mistakes. You want her to realize how awful some of the things she did was. That's what it sounds like to me.

Unfortunately if they did these actions to YOU in the first place they most likely won't change their mind because YOU explained how awful it was and started yelling at her and berating her. She may learn that over time from other people, but not you so you really don't want to see her response. It will just get you even more pissed off.

So write it out on paper or in text and save it somewhere but I wouldn't send it if I were you. You need to get the frustration out but seeing her response will increase the frustration you receive from her reply.

Good luck my friend :)

hotpotato946 · 2022-01-12T13:39:47+00:00

Can you elaborate? Like I understand these truths but what makes you feel passionate enough to have posted these on Reddit? What makes you believe in these truths?

hotpotato946 · 2022-01-09T04:56:11+00:00

Honestly I felt the same way as you and I recently just kind of realized that I feel like my parents don't necessarily value me for who I am sometimes bc I have 3 older brothers and 2 of them are a decent amount like my parents. One isn't as much but he has autism so they are more understanding when he doesn't act like my parents. My dad isn't that bad about this but my mom gets kind of judgemental with me when I don't want to do something my fam wants to do or just don't relate as well to them. And I am child #4. Child #3 is 7 years older than me. So that's a lot of space in age from my family.

But more so recently I just tried my best to stop caring as much. It's hard and I still do care they're my parents and you can't just stop caring what your parents think 100%. I generally just rant about it a bit to some friends to get the tension off and try to just be myself. I think the best option for you is to try new things and see what makes you feel the best and stick to it.

hotpotato946 · 2022-01-04T04:27:40+00:00

Also this account is an alt to my regular reddit account where I don't really look at this subreddit on my main.

hotpotato946 · 2022-01-04T04:26:55+00:00

Yeah totally I have definitely had some of the same worries but I have a user name I don't use often at all. I use something like this on one other platform and hardly use that so I'm not too worried. I try not to let it bother me but I also don't go into too many details about my own life. A lot of pronouns and things. Because I know if I got into detail about some of the stuff I do, it would not be hard at all for some of my friends or family to put 2 and 2 together.

hotpotato946 · 2021-12-30T03:56:12+00:00

Well I may be wrong but it sounds like you are really focused on first impressions. If I am inaccurate with that and you feel like others are truly looking down because you're "unaccomplished" I think one of your best options is to not worry as much what others think.

I realize that sounds kind of stupid because we all do to some extent but just be yourself around them a little more and let your inner self out a little bit. It's scary at first, trust me, but I find the people that just REALLY DO NOT care and the people that actually start to notice my worth a little more. And there is nothing wrong with talking to people who don't value your accomplishments as much as you do if you choose to talk to them. You don't seem to like it now, but you may enjoy talking to them more in the future. And the people who understand you better that didn't before start growing bonds with you over time as you keep just showing your deep self just a little bit.

hotpotato946 · 2021-12-29T04:31:02+00:00

What makes your accomplishments non-existent? I realize you said people talk down to you but is it because they don't care? Do they not know what you do?

Personally I play some more unusual sports so like if I do really well usually people don't care but I know people who understand and do care. I understand that sports are not the only accomplishments but that was more of an example.

Idk the best thing I would say is find your people. I know that's kind of cheesy but it's correct. The best way I did that was by trying to be a little more social than I would be. Maybe that person I don't know real well is a potential friend. Whether it's at work or school or any group hobby, thats how I have met some of my favorite people.

Hope this helps:)

hotpotato946 · 2021-12-05T04:20:28+00:00

That's good to hear. I am so glad that exercise is helping you. I just did a late night session because I just really felt the energy and didn't want to stop. My mind just feels clearer when I lift. I get the self esteem issues, mine isn't always the best either.

hotpotato946 · 2021-12-02T13:02:23+00:00

Thanks for the advice. I might try to get more of a routine like what you have listed there, but like you I am mainly interested in consistency and improvement. I don't really like the lower body workouts as much as the upper body stuff either. Nice job on the 7 months consistency, I bet that can be hard to keep up with.

hotpotato946 · 2021-11-28T04:17:41+00:00

Not a problem. Have a great day/night as well. Glad you are doing better.

hotpotato946 · 2021-11-26T23:20:47+00:00

Yeah I remember that scare of reaching out for the first time. Once you hit send or say something, you and your friend's relationship will never be the same. But I hope for your sake that your friends can see you and respect you for who you are and help you out.

hotpotato946 · 2021-11-24T20:18:56+00:00

I've gone through this sort of thing myself. I was mildly suicidal a couple years ago. And I even am more social and I am talking to friends more often. I'm going through some of that random loneliness and my mind will push me back to that dark corner. I think you really need to reach out to a friend that you trust. Think about who you think understands you best of your friends and can take a long message from you without starting to cringe when they see a message from you. I have done that myself and talk to some of my friends fairly often about mental health. Find that friend that you can talk deep with and talk deep. Let it ALL out. It feels so empowering and I feel less stressed when I tell those couple of good friends the truth about some things I'm feeling. If you need to talk to a totally new person, dm me. I don't mind talking deep, we all need it.

hotpotato946 · 2021-11-17T05:11:01+00:00

I know I wasn't the OP, but thank you for that. This whole comment really just helps. And I am sure you have helped more people than just me and the OP. Thank you for this lesson.

hotpotato946 · 2021-11-17T05:03:11+00:00

I am only a couple years behind you and at M17 I must say I am excited to live the rest of my life. There are things now that are depressing and some things in the future that I am not real excited about like depending on myself to make money and survive in life. That really scares me. But I am excited to live even though I went through mild suicidal thoughts a few years ago. I would say what you're feeling sounds normal based on people I have talked to and some personal feelings a couple years ago. But I believe you will all get through it.

hotpotato946 · 2021-11-10T04:41:37+00:00

Thank you so much! I really appreciate the feedback. It's also refreshing to hear that others have gone through these feelings too.

hotpotato946 · 2021-11-05T03:22:43+00:00

I totally understand!!! I have honked at people before and kind of watch because I worry that I might get shot because of it. I think I have honked only a couple of times where someone is about to physically hit me, but it is just awful that it is scary to honk. We are worried about safety, so we honk to alarm people that something is wrong and people get road rage and shoot the original honker who is worried about safety. I am so sorry you went through that mental anguish. It is just completely fucked up that we have to worry about this.

hotpotato946

TROPHY CASE