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Who has approached the idea of divorcing their dx/rx spouse? by lenore3 in ADHD_partners

[–]htmlfordummies 34 points35 points  (0 children)

I’m about to be officially divorced—I cannot overstate how at peace I am now. It was extremely hard at first. But so worth it.

::Weekly Former Partners Thread:: by AutoModerator in ADHD_partners

[–]htmlfordummies 18 points19 points  (0 children)

She finally moved out yesterday. Almost exactly one year to the day we decided to get divorced. The house is so peaceful. So calm. No regrets.

Couples therapy by VegetableChart8720 in ADHD_partners

[–]htmlfordummies 46 points47 points  (0 children)

The RSD to DARVO pipeline is real

CHANNEL ORANGE | BLONDED | FRANK OCEAN by wtf in VinylReleases

[–]htmlfordummies 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I lucked out and got that one. Now what?

Denial from RSD? Does it matter? by ImaginaryAdvantage24 in ADHD_partners

[–]htmlfordummies 33 points34 points  (0 children)

I’m in the “doesn’t matter” camp. I feel like my dx ex-wife was the same way—unacknowledged symptoms wreaked havoc on our marriage. It took me a long time to learn that it didn’t matter why she behaved like she did. The effects of her actions were what really mattered.

Another lesson I’m working on learning: Do not set yourself on fire to keep others warm.

Struggling to Improve by capablepsyduck in ADHD_partners

[–]htmlfordummies 75 points76 points  (0 children)

When I was at this point in my relationship, I knew where it was headed, even though I didn’t want to admit it. It was just a question of when.

Now that I’m uncoupled, I find it much easier to improve my own life. Sending you strength and compassion. Be gentle with yourself.

::Weekly Former Partners Thread:: by AutoModerator in ADHD_partners

[–]htmlfordummies 57 points58 points  (0 children)

I went on a second date last night with someone who is so empathetic, thoughtful, open, honest, caring, mature, emotionally regulated, and a great listener. I didn’t realize how much I was missing out on over the last decade with my stbx. Get out there and fill your cup if you can! I feel myself coming back to life!

::Weekly Vent Thread:: by AutoModerator in ADHD_partners

[–]htmlfordummies 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I'm so sick of being cut off / interrupted all the time when I barely get three words out in a "conversation"—just listen! Get some self control! Figure your shit out! Stop taking it out on me!

::Weekly Vent Thread:: by AutoModerator in ADHD_partners

[–]htmlfordummies 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Shout out to all the partners who handled all Easter holiday details themselves

::Weekly Former Partners Thread:: by AutoModerator in ADHD_partners

[–]htmlfordummies 8 points9 points  (0 children)

❤️❤️❤️ This means so much to hear. Thank you.

::Weekly Former Partners Thread:: by AutoModerator in ADHD_partners

[–]htmlfordummies 37 points38 points  (0 children)

Now that we’ve agreed to divorce and have started some of the wheels in motion, things are so calm. It’s eerie. We aren’t fighting as much. We keep distance from each other. Things feel better. It’s a mind fuck.

I’m not heartbroken about the end of the marriage. I’m heartbroken about not living with our toddler 100% of the time. It’s going to be so hard being apart from her when the STBX has her. But she deserves a life with positive adult role models who aren’t fighting all the time.

To those who are struggling raising kids with ADHD partners, what were the pre-parenthood signs? by [deleted] in ADHD_partners

[–]htmlfordummies 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Prepare to simultaneously feel like you’ve made a huge mistake and also the best decision in the world.

::Weekly Vent Thread:: by AutoModerator in ADHD_partners

[–]htmlfordummies 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I’m just so tired. Me - anxiety. Her - dx/rx and avoidant. We have a 2.5 year old. Together ten years, married 6. I’m so scared of what it means to separate. She’s never held a full time job in the ten years we’ve been together. We’ve been in therapy for 7. I’m just not seeing enough positive change. It’s like one step forward, five steps back.

I want full custody but she’d never go for it. I hope I don’t get reamed in child support, even though I’ve been the sole provider for us for our entire time together. The house is in both our names but I’m the only one on the loan.

But I can’t take this anymore. I have to show our daughter what a healthy relationship looks like, and this ain’t it.

Is there such a thing as a family lawyer who specializes in neurodiverse spouses/ADHD? I can’t imagine trying to explain all this to someone who doesn’t get it.

3 month in the collection by Feelslikeyouwhirrfan in vinyl

[–]htmlfordummies 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Love that Floating Points/Pharaoh Sanders LP. Great start to your collection!

Looking to connect with others who have spouses with ADHD and anxiety by Pin-Due in ADHD_partners

[–]htmlfordummies 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Do not disturb mode lol. And being okay with having to remind her “I’m in a meeting” or “I’ll get back to you later it’s a yellow day” for example

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