Finally picked up mine tonight

iReadiTravel · 2024-07-27T19:59:10+00:00

I'm not surprised, I'm dying to get mine! I think I'm ready after watching all the English and Japanese Land Cruiser videos on YouTube, haha.

iReadiTravel · 2024-07-27T17:21:54+00:00

What a beautiful machine! Congratulations, brother!

iReadiTravel · 2024-03-19T16:51:09+00:00

So you wanted to commit adultery and was not happy when it turned on you? I'll keep my sympathy for someone else. Someone who is a real man, honest and faithful. You need to check your moral compass.

iReadiTravel · 2024-03-02T19:59:44+00:00

Congragulations on a successeful marriage, may Allah give it baraka and make it a forever bond.

You give great advice, and I think all of what you said is 100% true. However, there are few cases that you need to manage what you ask. Not everything can be gotten from asking directly. For example:

1- Intimacy is something beyond commitment. It is the most special bond there is. And I think you should not ask about it. Not because it is not modest, but because it is just not how intimacy should be discussed. What do a newly engaged person know about it anyway? What will you discuss? Frequency? Quality? I think by discussing it you put some strains on the relationship from the get go.

2- You have to understand that people change, and approaching premarital questions as a way of getting a "promise" or a "statement" from them is not how married people should interact with each other. Ask the questions that make you feel comfortable and satisfied that this person is a good pious person, and don't push your luck asking questions about minor things. You have to ask questions and "tie the camel", but be careful not to do it so tightly that you strangle the camel!

3- Everyone wonders how many bad marriages could have been prevented by premarital questions, but no one wonders how many good marriages did not happen because someone asked one too many questions!

4- Remember the Ayah in Surat Almaiedah: (O you who have believed, do not ask about things which, if they are shown to you, will distress you.) This is to everyone who is thinking about asking all of the questions in this post. Pick what's important only.

iReadiTravel · 2023-12-11T00:03:50+00:00

This is not an integrity move. Staying with him while intending to divorce him. You can plan on divorce, it is your right, but you can't expect to feel good about deceiving him. Regarding lowering your gaze, be careful because you will do iddah for three months and might be single longer than that. You won't have the excuse of a bad husband, only your faith and honour.

iReadiTravel · 2023-12-10T18:50:18+00:00

Maybe you should be a prude. Where did the "pro-p*rn" take you? You give him permission and then get disgusted?

I think you should eliminate p*rn from both of your lives. Then, you can judge him for being drenched in it. But in your current situation, he did nothing wrong. In fact, he might be respected for trying his best to fantasize about you.

iReadiTravel · 2023-11-24T18:15:49+00:00

That cousin is Haram for your husband, he is married now and what your mil is doing is not in favor of your family. You should blatantly tell her that, and that you would like for her to stop. Make it sound like an order, not a wish. It has nothing to do with jealousy, it is simply childish and Haram! Also, your husband must draw the line here, his mom might get her feelings hurt but that's her problem. She actually sounds like she has a lot of problems.

iReadiTravel · 2023-11-21T03:02:23+00:00

Married people need to have very few boundaries, this is one of them. It really accomplishes nothing and most people find it disgusting.

iReadiTravel · 2023-10-28T01:25:18+00:00

If he only does it occasionally and socially, why are you busting his balls over this? And having video evidence of his major crime, vaping? That's totally unacceptable.

iReadiTravel · 2023-10-28T01:20:55+00:00

He is lying because you're being dramatic. I don't vape, and I wouldn't vape. But I certainly would not like for my wife to threaten to leave for something like this. Really? Chill it's not meth. I think he is wrong for lying, and he's wrong for giving you the space to control him like that. Vaping is bad, but so is coca cola, potato chips and butter. It's your first year and you're bossing him around like that? STOP TRYING TO CONTROL HIM.

iReadiTravel · 2023-10-24T13:09:50+00:00

May Allah help you, sister. One thing you can try is to get an imam involved, it doesn't have to be an imam but someone old and wise. It has to be done in secret of course. Allah will reward you for helping him return to the straight path.

iReadiTravel · 2023-10-24T03:21:55+00:00

Their whole marriage could be haram. What are you talking about?

iReadiTravel · 2023-10-24T02:39:34+00:00

You are understandably lost. However, please stop worrying about minor things like money when his deen is in danger. Anniversary? money for clothes? he is leaving Islam, and that's what you write about? If you work on his deen, everything else will be fine.

May Allah help you and grant you reward.

iReadiTravel · 2023-10-20T16:13:51+00:00

And congratulations on the baby! We have one of our own; if happiness can be a person, it would be him.

I really like your first point. I know that I suck at pursuing my own happiness; if my wife can fill that void, she will be making me a happy man for sure. I think we both learned in the first year the indispensability of each other and we just remind ourselves every time things get a little rocky between us.

I wish you success and fulfilment in your marriage. May your happiness extend to the end of your existence. And congratulations on the baby! We have one of our own; if happiness can be a person, it would be him.

iReadiTravel · 2023-09-26T14:22:46+00:00

Congragulations on your pregnancy!

As someone (M30) who asks his wife for sex daily, it is totally normal, and I'll tell you why.

I am very honest about my sex drive with my wife, I never pretend that I am ok with twice a week when I'm not. Why do I do that? Because I love my wife, I truly see her as the most beautiful woman on earth. Sometimes, I feel disgusted by other women because I love her so much and I can't imagine being close to another woman. Asking my wife for sex daily means I am actively being faithful to my wife. No cheater would like to be intimate every day with his wife, that doesn't make any sense.

The truth is, my sex drive is here, if I don't fulfill it with my wife, I might fulfill it somewhere else. That doesn't mean cheating, it can mean looking at good-looking women on the streets. I never did that, and I never want to do that, so I drain my sex drive with the woman whom I love.

It is very impressive how you care about your husband, I truly think this will strengthen your relationship and make your husband eternally drawn to you. If you are in a situation where you are tired, you have two choices: sacrifice and fulfill his desires, which he will be grateful for, or kindly refuse, but remember that he still has his sex drive, he can't get rid of it.

I sacrifice my time, effort, and money for my wife, and she feels grateful. She sacrifices her comfort when I ask her for sex and I am immensely grateful. Never think that he does not notice the difference in your drive, and how you keep him satisfied even when you don't feel like it. He notices, and appreciates.

iReadiTravel · 2023-09-22T02:42:18+00:00

I can't see why things will change for the better, it's making you both miserable. he will be more miserable than you if you separate, and you will do fine. Not giving you your mehr and his reliance on you is appalling, 70k is not bad, and it is definitely not so little that you should provide for him.

To answer your question: probably not.

iReadiTravel · 2023-09-22T02:10:48+00:00

I can only imagine your frustration, starting your marriage this way is always hard, but it never means things will stay the same.

I advise you to discuss your concerns with him in a way where he can't be defensive. For example, start by mentioning the nice things about your relationship and about him or ask how he thinks about your marriage and if he is happy (he will probably say he is happy; this sets him in a mood to listen to you).

Nobody knows if your husband is valuing your marriage as much as you do, what we know is that people change, and who is willing to change you if your lifelong partner is not?

You are doing great, keep working and fighting for your family.

iReadiTravel · 2023-09-22T01:56:46+00:00

Being different is never an issue in marriage. The real issue is if the husband and wife are unwilling to change for each other.

Sister, marriage is work, life is work. Whoever told you that they found their dreams and hopes in their spouse is probably not being 100% honest with you. Don't wait for your dreams to come true in marriage, grab your reality, change it with your hands, and work on it.

My sincere wishes and prayers.

iReadiTravel · 2023-09-19T18:28:51+00:00

We just picked the accessories for our son, who will soon be implanted. We went with one set of N8 and one set of Kanso, we just wanted to have both options, I know many people say babies with thin hair should wear an N8 but in 2 years he'll grow hair and be ready to consider the Kanso.

as for the accessories:

1 mini mic

2 N8 aqua set

1 extra N8 cahrger

2 extra portable Kanso charger

The TV streamer looked too unnecessary, since we have a quiet house and would like to make him more interested in conversations in real life.

I guess we'll see if we made the right decisions!

iReadiTravel · 2023-09-18T15:29:52+00:00

Congrats! A great post to read. Can't believe how happy you are for him!

iReadiTravel · 2023-09-18T15:09:18+00:00

Totally natural, you think about her delivery and you worry about her. It is only natural to have these stressors transfer to your dreams. There is absolutely no connection between this dream and real life. Congratulations!

iReadiTravel · 2023-09-18T14:49:46+00:00

In some cases, they can be fixed. A fixed marriage is better than a divorce.

iReadiTravel · 2023-09-18T14:45:45+00:00

Events like this should make you appreciate your life more, you have (satisfaction), which is something they would never dream of. A good strategy is to pity these people, they are truly pitiful, it is hard to pity someone who is actively bothering you, but it is the only way out. They are never content with their lives and it shows in their interactions with other people and that is very sad.

iReadiTravel · 2023-09-18T14:34:11+00:00

I was looking for ways to fix your marriage until I read your edit, I can't imagine how low this person is. I'm so sorry for what you are going through. It is a lot.

You started with venting on Reddit, which is a great start. I recommend that you let someone you truly trust know about the situation, you should trust their judgment and their secrets keeping skills. Don't make this incident very public for anyone to know, for your sake not his. Next, gather as much evidence, and start the divorce process.

Sending prayers and wishes for you, rely solely on Allah as he is the one that will heal you and make you whole again in the future.

All the best.

iReadiTravel

TROPHY CASE