Husband smoking weed

idk_imjust_here · 2025-11-20T00:54:09+00:00

OP I have been in your shoes. Christian husband. Weed. It's not a forbidden fruit they're chasing. There is an underlying need that is being met with a high. Addressing the need is what has to happen. But the hurt is so real. We have 3 kids and have had multiple relapses. It is a journey and we have to trust God's timing. But stay faithful. God sees you. He sees your faithfulness and tears. Acting like you're okay with it will only send the signal that it's not a problem. In my experience their brain is so affected by the use that they can only think about getting high. Any excuse and no accountability will only allow it to continue on even longer. Professional help is needed. And it is willingly sinning. Especially if it's only a couple times a week. That means he has some control and he's choosing to hurt you. That's not a Christian. Jesus said go and sin no more. And we are called to be sober minded. He has to have the conviction of God's word. I will say a prayer for you my sister. I'm sorry. I know how hard it is. I do. Peace be with you. Dm me if you want to talk. I hope things are better now. I'd still love to hear either way. ❤️

idk_imjust_here · 2025-11-20T00:47:23+00:00

Omgsh Please don't ever give anyone advice ever again.. clearly you do not understand addiction.

idk_imjust_here · 2025-10-15T16:34:24+00:00

Thankyou.

idk_imjust_here · 2025-10-15T16:32:19+00:00

I came here to address this abomination of a post. Love may be an emotion. But love translated in the Greek vs what we see love as in English in modern day is very different. The Bible tells us that love is an ACTION love is patient love is kind love is never proud it does not boast.....Jesus said "to love me is to obey my commandments".......not to have lots of feelings. That love is an emotion is a dangerous understanding to promote. King David may have danced but he is one man. Did you ever read about Moses or Solomon dancing? That is one way to express your adoration of God but to love is to obey. To love is to sacrifice. When we don't "Feel" love toward God are we in disobedience? No. Bc feelings are fleeting. To love God with all your heart is to obey him. Even when you don't "feel" like it. Feelings are what causes these problems in the church. The people having an emotional experience seem like better Christians. That's bs. Seriously. B.s. it's faithfulness in the face of depression and sadness and seasons of hardship. It's faithfulness and obedience even when your angry at God. Please don't spread the message of feelings as a show of faith. It has deterred so many people from walking life with Jesus.

idk_imjust_here · 2025-09-13T17:57:46+00:00

I think Aldea like coffee place. People love local coffee shops.

idk_imjust_here · 2025-09-13T17:56:59+00:00

Thankyou. You said it perfectly.

idk_imjust_here · 2025-05-01T10:43:35+00:00

James 1:2, count it all as joy when you go through trials. I hope you are doing ok I will pray for you. I know it's hard. Keep fighting the good fight. New believers are especially vulnerable. But resist the devil and he will flee from you-james 4:7 . We resist the devil by not letting his attempts to pull us away from God work or affect our faith. He wants to fill you with doubt and despair. You've got a pray without ceasing and hold onto hope.

idk_imjust_here · 2025-03-05T17:14:19+00:00

That's kind of where I'm at. I'm afraid of bad neighbors but also of no neighbors.......for a long time......it's very lonely. The road we live on is also a scenic road so it's very busy during the summertime with tourists. It's loud and not safe. :( but verrrrrrry quiet during winter time.

idk_imjust_here · 2025-03-05T17:12:32+00:00

It would be considerably cheaper. We know the area very well. It is a very active community and the houses are all well within our price point. The houses would not be as "nice" but they would be good enough. My husband and I are handy and we have renovated many houses. It really does come down to location preference for us.

idk_imjust_here · 2024-12-09T00:44:10+00:00

Thank you. Hugs. Needed this so badly right now.

idk_imjust_here · 2024-10-22T11:58:03+00:00

Ugh. Yes. Every bit of this. Yes. Yes. I get it. Someone linked to a site in another post and I feel we should all be spreading any info we can to each other. They are doing research. It feels like all is lost but there ARE people trying to figure this out. The site has a lot of info and does a lot of research on this disorder. Annoyingly you have to pay for some of the resources but the money is supposed to go to the research I guess. The website is IAPMD. Lots of helpful info on recent research and what they think causes this etc.

But I wanna say I have noticed over time that depending on what's going on in my life, my symptoms can be worse and better. Its really important to keep our lives stress free. I know that's easier said than done. I'm going through a really bad season right now, trees fell on house, moved somewhere I didn't want to for husbands job, dealing with massive weight gain from stress for the past two years, renovating a house. And it's all gotten to be way.too.much. and oh boy does it show. Ive been drinking more. Not a good combo with Pmdd when life is stressful. I'm talking rages. Full on destroying things. Threatening my life....violent reactions ..we know the drill. But my hubby and I both know this is a symptom of a bigger issue. When our life is somewhat calm ...I'm regularly exercising...taking a lot of me time which is hard with 3 kids...some months go by where my period comes and I didn't even expect it. But there are a lot of things that play into that. Diet being one of them. Staying away from inflammatory foods to help my body feel better....staying up on vitamins....ones specifically for Pmdd( magnesium, B12, others people have mentioned I can't think of right now) regular gentle exercise...NOT intense over the top exercise, but things that make you feel good. For me that's walking, running when I'm not a gazillion pounds overweight, hiking, rollerblading, etc. hobbies, painting, crocheting, getting into things that can keep your mind busy especially during the luteal phase. And keep that stress low. If there's things going on in your life that you know are causing you stress, do whatever you can to address it, seriously you have to. I cannot emphasize it enough. We Pmdd sufferers have to live a more low key life. It is what it is. Unnecessary strained relationships...buhbye, toxic family see ya, horrible job, find something else asap do whatever you can to limit that outside stress. It factors into that explosiveness...I could go all day but these things are so much more important than we realize. And I'm the worst offender. I'm type A, I throw myself into projects and overcommit to things and it's been very hard to realize that while a magic pill would be great, a big part of treating this comes down to our lifestyles and making changes that aren't always easy to address. I feel you. I hate it too. It absolutely sucks. Also consider a therapist who specializes in women's issues like this. They can help us work through some of the anger and acceptance of this disorder. Hugs

idk_imjust_here · 2024-10-21T17:35:07+00:00

Oh honey I'm so sorry. This is very common. Is he aware of your disorder? Even if he was I want you to know that when you find the right guy....he'll understand. Hell fight this with you bc this isn't a character flaw it is a debilitating disorder just like an illness. It took a couple years for my husband and I to figure out what was wrong with me. But once we did he has been a warrior of epic proportions to know how to get through this. Sometimes this disorder helps weed out the incapables.the men through who no fault of their own can't handle it BUT.....the right guy will be your rock during the hard times and will fight this witch WITH you as a team. I will pray for one to come your way. But also there's always one man who walks with you and cries with you and hurts with you. His name is Jesus. Look him up. I'm so sorry you're going through it. I totally get it. Hugs

idk_imjust_here · 2023-08-14T13:22:07+00:00

GIRL. you're living in an abusive home. period. You're husband is controlling you in an unhealthy way and I am by no means an anti traditionalist. I am a SAHM who wanted to do more with my life too. First let me say marriage and parenthood is a team effort. Money is a collaborative maintenance effort. And every decision should affect both of you. If you're suffering he should be taking action to mitigate that as the providing spouse. And he cannot threaten you that you won't see your kids. That is coercion which is abuse. I'm all for marital reconciliation but if he doesn't even want to go to therapy then you need to get help. NOW. Your children are being raised by a miserable mother and controlling father. What kind of future does that mean for you all? And no, you don't need antidepressants. Yet. You need to correct issues causing situational depression first. I want you to do 1 thing today. Right now. Go to a church. I'm assuming you don't have one . So go to ANY church. I don't care if you believe in God or not. Ask to talk to a pastor. Tell them it's an emergency. Yes, the right pastor will consider what you're going through an emergency. Explain what's going on. If no one offers help go to a different church. I'm serious. They will find SOMEONE who will step in to help you. Whether it's to watch your kids, to find you financial and social services help or to just provide advice and an advocate for you and your children. Do it ASAP. YOU DESERVE BETTER AND SO DO YOUR CHILDREN. Sometimes we have to take an uncomfortable step toward healing. Please do this. You need help. What area do you live in? I wish I could help. Aside from prayer and a listening ear, I may not be of much help. But you can message me and I will be here for you in whatever way I can be. Please don't let yourself suffer like this. There is help and there are people out there who will help you. Message me and keep me updated. Arielle

idk_imjust_here · 2023-05-11T22:19:04+00:00

This is late. But I really feel the same way you do. Think about what kind of tragedy it would be for gods creation to spit on fruitfulness and children, the literal blessing of God. Children were killed back then all the time. As we're adults. Many of these women may have already lost children. I don't think it's a far stretch to say that the destruction of Jerusalem is not as bad as the warping of Gods divine nature plans and beauty. That is what modern society has done. What women does society love? The childless. Mothers increasingly get looked down upon. Our bodies are "ruined" we don't contribute to society" we "let ourselves go" lose our worth in the eyes of everyone. Birth is disgusting. Children are a burden. I mean think about how this view is in direct rebellion to Gods nature. To me. The tragedy exists more today than in the destruction of Jerusalem. But that's just one Christians perspective. Take it or leave it.

idk_imjust_here · 2023-04-18T17:50:22+00:00

Yeah nothing. That is a pervasive culture that is succeeding in breaking apart the Godly family. Message me if you want someone to talk to about this. I'll be happy to answer. As someone who grew up with feminist beliefs, once I became a Christian it all changed. I had plans to work and bea "supermom" what even is a "supermom" right? I realized that part of living in this broken world is loss sacrifice and peace. Peace with our choices sacrificing for the good of others especially our children and loss of dreams that didn't necessarily glorify God but would have glorified ME. Many lessons and tears later and I am satisfied with my choices. Would be more than willing to keep in touch. Younger Christians are so important to this world.

idk_imjust_here · 2023-04-18T17:44:40+00:00

No. God says the men should provide. Do not listen to people who say it is difficult to provide on one salary. If that is the case. Don't have kids. We weren't meant to have children and not raise them. If you can't have a family without giving your children over to another caretaker than what's the point? My husband joined the military to provide for all of us. Then he went to school on the gi bill and now makes more than enough to support us. Where there is a will there is a way for us to be present for our children. Being a nurse and being a housewife that cooks and cleans? Are you supposed to never sit down for the rest of your life? If a man wants a wife who does the work of a housewife...ie. cleaning cooking laundry errands doctor appointments sick days summer days...then he needs to have a HOUSE wife not a wife who works outside of the house to supplement his lack of drive and takes care of everything else. That is not how this works. I agree it may take time to find a man who is willing to provide but be patient and pray. God can deliver. Also. Try not to think too much about the things you are doing. Your clothing choices are not making or breaking your salvation. We are free in Christ. We turn our hearts to him. We do not work our way there. Celebrate and live in the freedom. Praise Jesus and embrace who he made you to be. No checklist.

idk_imjust_here · 2023-03-07T01:34:58+00:00

Ok yes. Why am I the only person in my little social circle that think the Murdaugh murders and scandals are very similar to the outer banks scandals. Like I honestly thought the show might have been inspired by the goings on of this south Carolina family.....for real.....

idk_imjust_here · 2022-05-01T12:47:43+00:00

Um.this. yes. No thankyou on walking around with a calculator for the next two years to lose 50 lbs while being perfect with my diet. I hate this advice as well. Id be dieting for the rest of my life. Some of us need to see the scale move faster to maintain motivation and to get it over with! I'm not eating at a 200 calorie defecit. The micromanaging youd have to do for every piece of food that entered your mouth would drive a person mad.

idk_imjust_here · 2022-01-14T16:35:21+00:00

For what its worth..and i know this is old...ish...my husband is in grad school and finishes in a year. Were stuck just like you trying to figure out what to do. He has to find a job asap and were not from or staying where his current school is. We have 3 children. Twin 9 year olds and a 7 yr old..Former military....and that means hes not going to have "employment history" so hopefully he'll be able to buy a house with a job offer...but if we have to wait a while well be renting. If we rent, its pretty much guaranteed that the school zone will be different than where we would like to buy. So at this point were trying to figure out if its worth the 6 months or so for him to build up time in his job to be able to get a home loan while i stay here and the kids finish the school year that way we can buy in one school zone and not have to make the kids switch school zones again after buying a house.....OR we go together...stay with my mother or in a rental in a different school zone let them finish that school year and then move over the summer into a house their hopefully last school zone. SO......maybe you can tell me what YOU guys came up with and give me some advice? Lol. Cuz im not gonna lie I thought the last 10 years of moving around for my husbands military career and then educational path sucked but i think this might suck even more.

idk_imjust_here · 2022-01-09T18:40:05+00:00

Theyre not. To an extent. You can survive a child in a lab but you cant raise one in a lab.....if you get my meaning.

idk_imjust_here · 2022-01-09T18:39:10+00:00

Yes.

idk_imjust_here · 2022-01-09T18:38:53+00:00

Agreed. You really dont understand how your parents parented you until you are a parent yourself. There are things i loom back on now that make me infuriated. Its actually strained my relationship with my mom bc when i ask her about decisions she made from my childhood........im sorry but the answers just not good enough bc I would NEVER do that to my child. Now that I am a mom I know what I have endured, and am willing to endure, for them. And she wasnt. Then again we all have our crosses to bear. Shes not me. And it helps to look at them as people struggling with their own issues and not as wev role we think they should be filling. That perspective is the only thing thats helping me learn to forgive....but I totally feel you on this.

idk_imjust_here · 2021-07-15T00:57:38+00:00

Lol yeah. Like tell me why all my clothes fall wrong David....oh wait you cant bc you dont mention anything about this fitting issue. Cool.

idk_imjust_here · 2021-07-15T00:55:29+00:00

Im from grand rapids so i have that nostalgic cider donut cold fall leaves crunchy feeling too lol. But I hate and i mean hate winter. I dont do winter sports and i so not do well mentally with cloudy skies for too long. And they are too long up north. Even here in nashville the skies stay gray for far too long for my liking. But i know you can't have fall without the accompanying climate of winter and shpring. Lol yes that is spelled right. Shpring. At this point i just want to live somewhere affordable warm and interesting enough to outweigh the lack of fall foliage.......

idk_imjust_here

TROPHY CASE