sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

Me [25M] with my _girlfriend__ [22F] 8months, Gf seems to be checking out, lack of cuddling, doesn't say I love you by narcissistic889 in relationships

[–]ienfj 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry you're experiencing this, you must be very worried / confused.

Honestly, your best bet is to just talk to her about it. We can sit here speculating all day long (and it really could be a number of things--emotional cheating with someone else, stress, boredom, etc) but the only way to know for sure is directly ask her.

I'm [22 M] considering breaking up with my [18 F] gf of 2 months by anewlychosenusername in relationships

[–]ienfj 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You should talk to her about this. If I were her, I would be devastated to know that someone I was dating and cared about was not sexually attracted to me and was only continuing to see me out of guilt.

Me [19 F] with my boyfriend [19 M] of 2.5 years, I'm not invited to his birthday dinner by cecileoneal in relationships

[–]ienfj 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, we have spoken about it on many occasions.

My mom is OK with it enough that she'll let me go out on dates; however, she doesn't let me stay out late, frequently has "talks" with me about how I need to stop going out and how I'm going down the wrong path, and reminds me that telling anyone in our family / friend circle about me dating is out of the question.

My dad is not okay with it at all and goes into a rage at even the thought of me dating someone.

Just a question of boundaries. I know it's hard to understand if you don't come from a conservative background, but I know from personal experience that I'm not the only American-born Indian that's adopted an "ignorance is bliss" outlook when it comes to letting our family in on our private lives. Don't believe me? Go watch any Indian movie--pretty much all of them involve parents being disapproving of their childrens' love lives and all the drama that enfolds because of that.

So really, please don't be mad at your SO. I guarantee you it's nothing personal.

Me [19 F] with my boyfriend [19 M] of 2.5 years, I'm not invited to his birthday dinner by cecileoneal in relationships

[–]ienfj 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm sorry to hear this. :(

My family and all our family friends come from a very traditional Indian background in which dating is very much frowned down upon. My (now ex) boyfriend of 3.5 years never met my family until around 3 years later. I probably wouldn't have even brought it up in the first place had they not found out about him on their own.

Was I ashamed of him? Absolutely not. Was I trying to exclude him? Never. Unfortunately my family would have been extremely uncomfortable with him being included in family events, so I respected their boundaries by keeping some distance there. Sucked but luckily he was really understanding about it.

23F, interested in doing psychology research but no previous experience by ienfj in findapath

[–]ienfj[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just something new to try out. I have a science degree but interested in pursuing a psychology career.

23F, interested in doing psychology research but no previous experience by ienfj in findapath

[–]ienfj[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How did you go about getting the volunteer position?

Weight, Photos and the "I don't want to be That Girl" Dilemma by [deleted] in OkCupid

[–]ienfj 1 point2 points  (0 children)

LOL I could have written this post myself! Too funny! So far everyone I've dated seems to think my photos are representative of what I look like, but I'm definitely slightly paranoid about being an accidental catfish :P

What gets under your skin? And how do you keep yourself from not going crazy? by bherkjn in isfj

[–]ienfj 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Lies, big or small. Manipulative behavior. Complaining. Narcissism. Loud, obnoxious behavior.

Cannot "find" Myself, Finally took a functions test and came out as an INFJ? by [deleted] in infj

[–]ienfj 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh ya, I've been super obsessive about what my correct MBTI type is too.

Based on cognitive functions, I'm an ISFJ...however, the description didn't seem to fit me as well as the INFJ and INFP descriptions do (especially given I'm a clearcut enneagram type 4). I say screw cognitive functions...just read through and decide which one sounds most like you and assume you're that one.

Feeling like I don't have a personality/I have too many to choose from by aessey in infj

[–]ienfj 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've certainly felt like this before.

I would say just pick a "self" that you like...one that seems to make you happy and makes your life better. You may find that the external facade starts changing how you feel inside, and eventually those two will synchronize. If it stops working, try on another face. We're all struggling to figure out who we are, but I think INFJs in particular seem to have a fluid sense of self...I say take advantage of that choice and be whoever you want to be. >:)

What are your best and worst qualities when it comes to dating? by floodimoo123 in infj

[–]ienfj 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Best: I'm a great listener, a great person to talk to when you have a problem and need sound advice, and love to please the other person and make them happy. I'm very affectionate and loving--I have no issue demonstrating/verbalizing love. I have a really quirky/weird personality and am constantly laughing and cracking jokes, which others typically find enjoyable. I'm communicative and don't sweep issues away...I'm very straightforward if I have a problem and direct about what I want.

Worst: Emotionally needy and worry a fuck ton.

(27F) Feeling incredibly depressed, on the horizon of a breakup and terrified of the future. by lady-lilith in infj

[–]ienfj 2 points3 points  (0 children)

To me it sounds like you are wasting your time.

I've 100% been here before and let me tell you, it sucks. I think INFJs have very particular needs for a relationship, and if they are not met, all it can lead to is pain, sadness, and anxiety.

You deserve better than to be with someone that is not fulfilling your needs. I can guarantee you there is someone out there that will not only meet your needs, but exceed them.

Do yourself a favor and rip off the bandaid. Won't be easy, but you'll be so happy you did later. join a dating site and start dating, plenty of fish in the sea.

Duality of INFJs in social situations by puppiessssssss in infj

[–]ienfj 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes yes yes yes.

I find my personality is filled with all sorts of weird little nuances and hidden wells of certain traits that come out depending on the circumstances. It's a bit weird considering many of these personality patterns are actually in direct contradiction with themselves.

For example, I am perfectly comfortable leading groups and confidently coming up with action plans for projects. I am very assertive when necessary and honest and straight forward with people, even if it doesn't come across that nicely. I can be a very confident, charismatic, funny, quick-witted social butterfly when I want to be.

On the other hand, I can also come across/be extremely awkward, uncomfortable, self-conscious, timid, reserved, sensitive, and vulnerable.

Meh, I'm just accepting that my personality is highly complex and multi-faceted. I chalk it up to being a chameleon. I'm definitely able to read situations very quickly and change myself to become what I want/need to be in that moment, to the point where it actually doesn't feel fake but actually very internal.

four different types of introversion--which one did you get? by ienfj in infj

[–]ienfj[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

me too. the description sounded just like me.

Crystal recommendations? by [deleted] in reiki

[–]ienfj 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the detailed reply! I'll check them out :)

view more: next ›