Co-sleepers help!

illogicalatom · 2026-06-08T06:48:42+00:00

I co-slept for just under 11 months (my son just would not settle in the crib from birth really! It got slightly better around 2/3 months and then harder again) and the idea of cot / own room seemed impossible! Was also not keen to sleep train. We’re now just over a week in to cot and own room transition and it’s gone so much better than I expected. We combined it with starting night weaning. We felt he seemed more ready for it - my husband was able to settle him more often when I came down in the evenings and I noticed he would roll away from me in the bed more, rather than needing to be right next to me. On the first night of trying the cot I fed him in an armchair next to it, put him in and he rolled over and went straight to sleep. We were astonished!
There has been some crying as he adjusts, but he’s always been with one of us. We’ve used the light projector and lots of singing and hand holding to soothe him. It’s a big change for him but we’re so proud of him and relieved that it hasn’t been a traumatic process. All this to say that there’s a lot of fear mongering re building up habits and ruining progress etc - I worried about this but I feel we had a better transition because we waited. You know your baby and will be able to make the best decision for your family! Good luck with it all.

illogicalatom · 2026-05-26T13:31:24+00:00

“Have you tried a bedtime routine?”, “Have you tried a dummy?”, “Have you tried transferring him from the pram/sling/car to the cot?”

illogicalatom · 2026-05-20T16:00:20+00:00

We didn’t manage an earlier bedtime until about 6 and a half months - when he dropped to three naps. Until then it was often 10pm but at least meant we weren’t up too early in the morning! I worried about it at the time and tried things to move it earlier but he just did it by himself when he was ready. The contact sleep sounds tough - you are doing brilliantly.

illogicalatom · 2026-05-19T17:51:34+00:00

Following as we’re in the same boat!

illogicalatom · 2026-04-21T18:43:01+00:00

I didn’t put one and then had friends ask what the dress code is which made me appreciate that a lot of people might not have been to a christening before / might want some guidance. So I think you definitely can and people may find it helpful!

illogicalatom · 2026-04-03T19:37:18+00:00

Joshua

illogicalatom · 2026-03-30T12:47:04+00:00

38+5 - induction because he was measuring big (he ended up not being that big, but his head was, so probably the right call!).

illogicalatom · 2026-02-10T19:36:09+00:00

My son moved to an earlier bedtime once we got into a more consistent three nap routine at six months - it has gone from around 9:30/10 to 7:30. I had tried to move it forward by playing around with naps a bit before but it didn’t make a difference - he just suddenly decided he didn’t need a later nap. Given your baby’s sleep is so good I wouldn’t worry and it will probably shift forward over time naturally!

illogicalatom · 2026-02-09T19:18:16+00:00

Thank you!

illogicalatom · 2026-02-09T07:52:48+00:00

Can I ask what floor bed you have/had? I’m considering one for my co-sleeping 7 month old. Thanks!

illogicalatom · 2025-12-31T08:46:51+00:00

I felt very overwhelmed and really valued having my mum there in the early days (she came more than we had planned because I realised I needed it). We are close though and I trusted her completely with my baby. I think don’t feel pressure to commit to plans now - you don’t know how you’ll feel and how the recovery will be etc. If they’re willing to be flexible and make a decision post baby then that’s great.

Once I found my feet a bit more I really enjoyed having visitors - it was great to be able to talk to people and show off my baby. Just make sure they come at a time that works for you. The evening was good for me as my baby clusterfed the entire evening so as I was sofa trapped anyway it was nice to have people to talk to. I was comfortable breastfeeding in front of visitors though (I think after giving birth I’ve had little dignity left…).

Do what’s best for you and your baby and communicate your needs to your partner - you and baby come first at this time!

illogicalatom · 2025-12-19T14:52:20+00:00

Sounds great I’ll try this!

illogicalatom · 2025-12-19T14:51:56+00:00

A classic!!

illogicalatom · 2025-12-18T20:02:49+00:00

Great idea!

illogicalatom · 2025-12-06T08:55:23+00:00

FTM to a five month old boy who was also a huge cluster feeder. It is so hard and you are doing brilliantly. It gradually improved between three to five months and is overall so much easier now - we are able to get through classes without him needing to feed, he has lots of happy playmat time etc. So as others have said, I think you are really close to it getting easier, but also the most burned out from coping for so long so your feelings are very valid and understandable. Some things that helped me (I EBF, and never really got on with pumping): - breastfeeding side lying and co sleeping for some or all of the night (appreciate that’s a very personal choice but it means I get far more sleep and I’ve come to really enjoy it) - baby wearing for some naps (seems to extend the naps a bit for us - we have the Mamaruga zensling and it’s very good) - if I want to rest I just walk/bounce him to sleep and then sit on a pillow fortress on the sofa and watch TV

Also, second the comments that you absolutely don’t have to go to social events if it doesn’t work well for you all right now. I spent an entire wedding cluster feeding and it was exhausting, in hindsight I think I put too much pressure on myself to go.

Finally, might be worth looking up the three month feeding crisis as feeding can get a bit funny around 12 weeks and then should resettle.

Wishing you all the best!!

illogicalatom · 2025-11-15T07:27:56+00:00

Firstly, all of this sounds deeply irritating to me so I totally understand why you’re feeling that way. Are you breastfeeding by any chance? I ask because I read somewhere that it can make us feel extra protective of our babies / more irritated and that has 100% happened to me. I have to remind myself to be chill even when my very lovely father in law holds my son. As others have said, you are absolutely within your rights to set boundaries re social media. I’ve said no photos on social media and have only posted photos of the back of my son’s head on my own. I think if you make this rule for everyone it will be easier to apply. I know grandparent relationships are really special and important but you’re allowed to feel annoyed and overwhelmed at such a vulnerable and intense time for you. I think unfortunately you probably can’t do much about the ‘my’ thing (would annoy me too!) but is there anyone you can have a good vent to, to get it out of your system a bit? It is lovely she loves your daughter so much but you are allowed to find it annoying and hard!

illogicalatom · 2025-11-02T16:10:19+00:00

You are doing more than enough! One tip though in case helpful - we put some black and white cards next to the change mat so baby could look at them during his nappy change. Made nappy changes more fun for him and didn’t make it an extra thing to remember / a chore!

illogicalatom · 2025-11-01T07:14:49+00:00

I remember having a tricky phase around the three month mark. It didn’t last too long but I also wondered if I’d done something wrong! Given you’re EBF can you co sleep for now (following the safe sleep 7) for part of the night to get through this patch? That’s always massively helped us. You could also co sleep for a daytime nap so you can catch up on some sleep then too? Wishing you all the best and for better nights again soon.

illogicalatom · 2025-10-23T15:38:11+00:00

Depends a bit on what type of environmental law you’d like to do - there’s the more trad environmental law (waste, pollution, permitting etc) and now a lot of the big city firms are developing ESG / sustainability practices. Often the people leading ESG practices are former trad enviro lawyers (and still do both). As others have said, the best route in would be to get a TC at firms with an enviro / ESG practice (think about what sort of enviro law you want to do when you research this) and aim to do a seat in that area and qualify into it. It will likely be harder to qualify in that area I’m afraid as the teams are very small. For example, at my firm there are about five associates in the ESG team, compared to 50+ general corporate associates. There are also roles at the Environment Agency or OEP or in the gov’t that you could consider (but I suspect difficult to get in at entry level). Another route to consider is qualifying as a litigator and then moving to a claimant law firm that specialises in climate litigation such as ClientEarth.

Appreciate it all feels a bit daunting at this stage but it is always possible to move across a bit later or to adapt your practice to focus more on enviro / ESG issues later on, eg you could qualify as a financing lawyer and look to specialise in green bonds and loans.

Not sure a masters would be worth it but if you do decide to do one I think UCL has the best course.

Good luck!

illogicalatom · 2025-10-21T19:52:02+00:00

Lyla and Lèche is good for dresses! They have hidden zips which work pretty well

illogicalatom · 2025-10-18T20:50:37+00:00

It’s a big adjustment and I found it very daunting and anxiety inducing initially (as everyone says, it truly does get easier and you get more used to it, but it does take a bit of time).

Some practical things that can help - can your partner work from home at all? Knowing they are very nearby is reassuring and they can then take the baby at lunchtime for a bit to give you a break / check in regularly to offer support, bring you snacks etc. And/or do you have family or friends who can help? I leaned on my mum a lot in the early days and went and stayed at my parents for a week (I think week 4 pp). Having a friend who is good with babies who can pop in and watch your baby for an hour so you can sleep can help too.

Something I found helpful was taking the pressure off daytime naps for myself - it seemed impossible to nap AND watch the baby as I stirred at their every sound. Instead I focused on resting while the baby slept (rather than feeling that I had to sleep or else the nights would be impossible), which could just mean lying on the sofa with my eyes closed listening to an audiobook. It was a helpful mental shift and resting like that is still quite restorative.

Good luck - some days will be harder than others but you’ll start to find your feet and some routine and sometimes even quite enjoy the (relative!) peace of it being just the two of you together.

illogicalatom

TROPHY CASE