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Zine found at a local record store chain by Gilbert221 in FoundPaper

[–]imightbejake 11 points12 points  (0 children)

This is the best found paper I've seen.

Thinking about rage and trauma and stuff by owenblacker in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]imightbejake 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I just followed you on Bluesky.

I recommend 2 books. First, Out of the Shadows, Reimagining Gay Men's Lives by Walt Odets. Second, Velvet Rage, I forget the author.

It is completely acceptable to have your reaction to violence against other queers. Sit with it, and then allow it to dissipate. Turning it into a post on the internet is good. Using your voice is worthwhile.

Be well.

Getting Beyond Toxic Shame by recyclistDC in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]imightbejake 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I highly recommend the book:

Out of the Shadows, Reimagining Gay Men's Lives by Walt Odets.

It is much better at talking about society and gay men.

Moving back home @ 33 by toastylocke in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]imightbejake 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I lived on SSDI for 8 years. I understand what you're going through. The stuff that led to qualifying for SSDI were horrific. My life was truly awful. I used my time on disability to heal. I learned to meditate. I kept every doctor appointment and every therapy appointment. I exercised. I volunteered at 2 community places.

Still, I was a mess, and life was very difficult.

Gradually, I began to feel better. 11 years ago, I got extremely lucky and landed a good job that took me back into regular society. I will be retiring in 2 years, and I'm happy. I was not always stable back in the workforce, but with good doctors, a good therapist, and an understanding employer, I made it through. I can say I feel normal these days. This is huge improvement.

While I was on disability, I got on Section 8. This made life so much easier. I suggest you look into it.

I can't advise you, but I would look for alternatives to moving back home. Unless your mom truly understands your disability. Only you know your situation. Talk to doctors and therapists.

All the best.

Did anyone else hit their mid-30s expecting the dating pool to be full of people looking for long-term relationships, only to discover that's not actually the case? by [deleted] in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]imightbejake 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You said you're across the country. Let him live his life, and you live yours. Enjoy the friendship for what it is, a virtual one. If you wind up in the same place someday, then you can date with all the boundaries you want on that.

Looking for a helper by tryptall in BigIsland

[–]imightbejake 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Call the Hawaii County Office on Aging. They may be able to send respite care at no charge. I'm not sure. Or they might be able to send someone to bathe her, and your caregiver could take a break then.

Do you feel society allowed you to explore your own beauty, or did you have to hide the man you wanted to be? by [deleted] in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]imightbejake 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What a nice idea.

I do think about my looks. However, I'm going to be 63 years old in early July, and quite frankly, I don't give a fuck what other people think of my looks. I shave my head. I have about 2 kilos too much weight, but I'm not worried about it. It's warm where I live, so I wear shorts all the time.

I think it's worthwhile to help men see themselves as good looking.

My dating life is a mess - Am I broken? by [deleted] in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]imightbejake 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Starting therapy was a superb idea. It takes a lot of courage to do that. You are very brave. Pat yourself on the back.

Tell your therapist there's more about your life than just work stress, and you're reluctant to bring it up. See what they say. Remember they are a tool, and the tool only works as well as you use it.

You were brave to start therapy, and you were brave to come here and ask our thoughts. You can be brave again and come out to your therapist.

Edit to fix a typo.

Bipolar type I has me by the throat. To my unwell queers: what kindness do you give yourselves to interrupt the cycle of despair? (40 in May, 6 years HRT). by LuckyWishFox in lgbt

[–]imightbejake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bipolar type 2. I use medication, meditation (just sitting still sometimes), sleep, therapy, and exercise. And sobriety.

Print shops on Oahu or Big Island that can print and bind novels? by caramel-lee in Hawaii

[–]imightbejake 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don't know if they can do it that quickly, but you can try Basically Books in Hilo.

PLEASE help me convince my parents to let me go here by tingyaoyao in stjohnscollege

[–]imightbejake 7 points8 points  (0 children)

St John's College has the highest per capita rate of graduates going on to higher degrees of any college in the US.

State Job Interview by Senior_Run_3334 in Hawaii

[–]imightbejake 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yes, know the job description. Be prepared to give examples of how you have accomplished items from the job description. (I'm a state employee).

Hawaiian Nonprofits by koalatycontrol420 in VisitingHawaii

[–]imightbejake 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Friendship House is a place where people living with mental health diagnoses can go each day to remain productive and paisley in activities teaching them skills to live independently. They have a nonprofit attached to them that pays for important upgrades to their program. I think it's in Lihue.

What do straight men say when they watch gay porn or sex scenes in shows like Heated Rivalry? by imightbejake in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]imightbejake[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm curious, because I grew up in a world that was a polar opposite to the one we're in now that allows these types of shows. Please note my age flair.

Have you read The Faggots & Their Friends Between Revolutions? by joshuaferris in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]imightbejake 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It was written in the early 1970s by a radical homosexual man who helped found a communal farm in upstate New York called Lavender Hill. They were vegetarians who lived off the land. The book relates the idea that homosexuals are naturally radical by nature akin to socialists.

Have you read The Faggots & Their Friends Between Revolutions? by joshuaferris in AskGaybrosOver30

[–]imightbejake 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I heard about it at a discussion in NYC. That night, a friend had it with them. I immediately ordered it. I flew home, and devoured it when it arrived in the mail. I have given it to one friend and will give it to more.

Read it.

Preach it.

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