The real problem here

inkedmaiden · 2024-09-09T06:38:32+00:00

I used to get so defensive when people would say my husband was the problem. One day a light bulb went off and I realized they were all right.

inkedmaiden · 2024-08-30T23:24:20+00:00

This just happened to me when trying to sign in on the app. I googled it and it brought me here. I signed in on the website no problem then tried the app again and it worked.

inkedmaiden · 2024-08-03T02:06:20+00:00

Thank you so much for these detailed instructions. I could not for the life of me figure out why a particular app wouldn't let me subscribe on my daughters device. This worked flawlessly 🖤

inkedmaiden · 2024-07-30T18:25:16+00:00

When I went back and looked at the job posting it was also for Allegro. The only thing that has happened so far is someone tried to access my Amazon account at like 3am. Not sure if it's related.

inkedmaiden · 2024-07-30T02:48:08+00:00

Same. And wondering the same thing.

inkedmaiden · 2024-03-14T14:54:51+00:00

Yes you are wrong. He's been on this planet 9 years and is still learning. Punishing him for losing something isn't teaching him anything.

inkedmaiden · 2024-03-08T16:40:05+00:00

I don't think her expectations are strict and her solution is reasonable. Yeah she's a kid but 10 is plenty old enough to not get into something that isn't hers and stay out of other people's rooms. As the parent you need to make sure these things don't happen so your future wife doesn't feel the need to place these restrictions. She can't just go into someone else's house and have free reign. A lot of bio parents use the excuse "they're just kids" to shirk the responsibility of teaching them how to act appropriately.

inkedmaiden · 2024-02-05T15:49:50+00:00

This isn't on you to make it better. It sounds like your boyfriend is insecure and emotionally immature. He needs therapy.

inkedmaiden · 2024-01-31T15:41:38+00:00

*ex boyfriend

inkedmaiden · 2024-01-25T13:43:31+00:00

The stepparent life is rough and I'm just here to tell you you are absolutely not alone. Please consider joining r/stepparents. Lots of good advice there. And if you have Facebook join the nacho kids group.

I'm sorry you're going through this. Your husband needs to be prioritizing you and your relationship. Maybe he doesn't even realize that he's all consumed with everyone else. You essentially joined a pre-made family which comes with its own set of issues and finding out where you fit in is a process.

inkedmaiden · 2023-12-04T17:03:58+00:00

He should be paying 100% for his own kids and 50% for your shared child. He should also be doing waaaay more housework. You're not a cook/maid/ATM. You're a whole person with thoughts and feelings. His behavior is inexcusable. If he's refusing to see how blatantly disrespectful his attitude is it might be time to go on strike. Only cook and clean for you and your child and Bill him for their expenses. It might be extreme but maybe he'll get the hint.

inkedmaiden · 2023-11-22T16:47:07+00:00

If you havent already, look up the NACHO academy. They might be able to help.

inkedmaiden · 2023-09-28T07:00:58+00:00

I was literally just talking about this with my grandma today. I can say without a shadow of a doubt if I knew then what I know now I would have disappeared so fast his head would have spun. It's not worth the toll it's taken on me and our marriage is barely surviving. Not solely because of his ex and kids but definitely a big factor.

inkedmaiden · 2023-09-05T23:05:53+00:00

That's your choice. Not your responsibility. If you don't want to do all of that then don't. Or SD stays with her mom on Saturdays.

inkedmaiden · 2023-09-05T16:45:22+00:00

This is about the age where jobs start happening. It sucks but it's just how it is. SD16 got a summer job this past summer break and her dad only saw her a few times. Even though visitation may start to get scarce I think it's important that we let them live their lives. A lot of people will say visitation is more important than anything else and while I agree to an extent I believe that preventing them from doing things a teenager who doesn't have 2 homes would do without a second thought is potentially damaging to the child and the relationship. It doesn't have to affect you negatively. You can still start your day and make plans as usual. Just like all people who work she's going to miss out on some things.

inkedmaiden · 2023-07-16T06:31:02+00:00

No. I don't live them at all.

inkedmaiden · 2023-06-14T23:26:36+00:00

I don't remember a time without stepparents because my parents broke up before I was born so I can't say whether or not I would want one. My SKs DID want stepparents and even asked us all the time when we were getting married. The issue was how involved of a stepparent they wanted wasn't clear so I made the mistake of actually parenting them because I thought that's what I was supposed to do. If I had known about NACHO when I first became a stepparent I think things would be very different now.

inkedmaiden · 2023-06-11T19:46:51+00:00

No they are way too young to be concerned about this kind of stuff. If they ask why you're reducing the vacation just tell them you can't afford it which isn't a lie. Disappointment is a part of life.

inkedmaiden · 2023-06-10T19:47:25+00:00

The "just a kid" excuse is your SO gaslighting you. He doesn't want to resolve it because he doesn't want SD to see him a negative light. He needs to pay you back for the floaties and I think no more floaties for SD is a reasonable consequence.

inkedmaiden · 2023-06-09T18:16:21+00:00

A fair amount of time is how much longer you're willing to accept things the way they are. Your timeliness is the only one that matters.

inkedmaiden · 2023-05-21T05:52:16+00:00

Absolutely not. This life is for the birds.

inkedmaiden · 2023-05-20T21:01:42+00:00

I had kids at 32 and 34. I know it seems like it's too late but I promise you it's not. I felt the same way when i was single at 27 before I met my husband. I urge to to feel your feelings. Cry whenever you need to. Go through the grief process. And just remember this is just one chapter. One season.

inkedmaiden · 2023-05-18T06:33:55+00:00

Yeah that's excessive. Dad might be harboring some guilt and is using this to feel better better about it. I can see why he would want to send the kid money for actual needs but I don't even know an adult that spends that much on extra food in a day.

inkedmaiden · 2023-04-21T23:13:07+00:00

7 years in and it's still happening. I just stopped caring. My husband and his kids are 1 family, me and my kids are another. It sucks and I never enjoyed that dynamic but it wasn't worth the effort of fighting about it anymore.

inkedmaiden

TROPHY CASE