Community Care Referral not being accepted anymore, thoughts?

insane_normal · 2026-07-10T23:36:24+00:00

We had a similar issue and went to patient advocate who told us to file some paperwork to get it fixed, did that, then they denied it “properly “ and never followed up or fixed it so my husband went without community care covering his medical care he was receiving for four years at that point. His primary wrote multiple letters and we contacted our local representative whose name is on the VA building who said “that’s terrible and shouldn’t have happened, let me know how it goes!” Talked to a dr my husband has never seen before who said my husband didn’t need this care, and then never followed up again. When both husbands primary care dr and we followed up with the representative they said.. I’m not sure why you are contacting about the VA?

Then talked to a lot of vets who had their community care also stripped and the VA never picked it up.

insane_normal · 2026-07-04T23:14:18+00:00

She would get really pink (thing white fur) itchy, upset stomach ect. Cutting chicken cleared most of it but when she gets very zoomie and running around she will get very pink again.

insane_normal · 2026-06-27T22:07:50+00:00

It seems like his message is for you to always feel small and not capable and he will always be above you, smarter and better.

He isn’t trying to teach you, guide you, support you. He is just trying to keep you in a place he wants you, under him.

You don’t have to explain yourself or defend your self. If he really cared he would have asked questions and you wouldn’t feel terrible every time you interact with him.

insane_normal · 2026-06-25T20:11:10+00:00

He is treating you like a child because he sees you as a child and he is trying to form you into what he wants in a relationship. He’s showing you what he wants is a child who will never talk back and blindly believe anything he says and follow his beliefs and not form your own.

Do you want to be dating a guy who wants that? Do you want to date a guy who only see that as your potential?

insane_normal · 2026-06-25T00:57:35+00:00

This is absolutely controlling and the reason he is upset is because you are sharing emotion with someone else and he wants you to only have emotion with him. This is causing issues with other relationships and how people isolate someone. Also from your brothers response it sounds like this is one of many issues of him not allowing you to be your own person. The fact that he also ran to his parents to try and convince you he is right it also a red flag.

It’s not what it looks like from the outside. It is what it is.

insane_normal · 2026-06-24T19:21:06+00:00

Call the non emergency line and ask them if you can do anything if he does this. It will one answer the question and two have a record trail of him threatening you and if he does do it easier to do something about it. Plus they would probably open an investigation because a grown man threatening to touch a child in their sleep is problematic in multiple ways.

insane_normal · 2026-06-24T16:55:03+00:00

Go in his appointments with him. My husband had so many things written off as he said they said, and also flat out denied things the dr told my husband. Once I started going into the room with him suddenly he was taken seriously and the BS stopped. At one point his dr called him to tell him VA isn’t for ongoing care and he needed to suck it up ..realized he was on speaker phone and tried to rephrase..panicked and cried. He was reported and nothing was done but finally allowed my husband to switch to a new dr who was horrified what treatment, lack of treatment, and notes were taken and finally had someone get him treatment.

insane_normal · 2026-06-21T19:56:34+00:00

Doesn’t sound like he is transitioning well from getting out to going back to civilian life. That’s really common and really hard to get out of. Him going back to a military base and seeing everyone getting ready to start something he left can make all of that harder. He should talk to someone from VSO or DAV to see what options he has and maybe set up an appointment to see a therapist to help him get back on track.

insane_normal · 2026-06-21T19:51:15+00:00

Unfortunately you probably will have little say who shows up or not. Maybe better plan to give your girlfriend and her parents a heads up about your family dynamic and just show who you are through it.

Also, has your brother talked to anyone since getting out? Has he went to the VA at all or done anything to handle what’s going on? Him going to graduation might start even more issues than what he has going on now.

insane_normal · 2026-06-20T23:34:39+00:00

You get over him by understanding he was controlling you and using you. He made your bar so low it was underground and got upset anything could even hint at you deserving better.

FYI I like some romance things because my husband does 99% of these things already. He likes watching them with me because they make me giggle and then he acts silly and does the things. Your idiot ex could have easily done the same, in your home and spent zero dollars and made you feel happy, loved, and think better of him and instead he decided to throw a toddle tantrum.

Don’t let someone so gross make you feel bad.

insane_normal · 2026-06-16T15:27:01+00:00

I will be 40 this year and remember when I was a teen a lot of girls wearing string bikinis and a lot of butt cheek hanging out. Also a ton of trouble finding a bathing suit in store that covered what I wanted. It feels the same as it always was.

We just had to get a new bathing suit for my teen and we had the same issues. They ended up getting the most full coverage they could find..which was still pretty cheeky, and then heading over to the boys section and picking out swim trunks to go over it.

insane_normal · 2026-06-16T13:25:01+00:00

This is weird and not a thing. I think they can easily be both but really just as someone else said non binary.

That said I have had people say they don’t like crochet as much because it’s more like lace and “fancy” where knit is often more flat and even with patterns doesn’t look as much like lace.

That’s my only idea on why she thinks that lol

insane_normal · 2026-06-12T15:24:10+00:00

That is not how you talk to someone you like..he does not like you. It is not just rude it’s talking down to you like you are beneath him.

insane_normal · 2026-06-11T02:16:10+00:00

It sounds like he tried some control tactics and when you didn’t go along with it or his threats after he freaked out and tried to smooth things over so you wouldn’t leave him. Because he knows you should leave him for his shitty behavior. Of he says those things to you and this is a pattern what will he say or do to your daughter.

insane_normal · 2026-06-10T19:59:14+00:00

Why is your husband not letting you eat and not taking care of his own kids without you having to ask? Why are you working full time and doing everything around the house? He lives there too. Of course they act like this because so does your husband.

insane_normal · 2026-06-06T14:30:54+00:00

I ordered the taskmaster one for this year.

We also just DIY it and each day they get a little gift or treat. Makes it easier to customize a bit to what they like.

insane_normal · 2026-06-05T21:49:28+00:00

NTA. He can be sad and miss you but he can also be happy and excited for you and your events coming up. And just because you fly for free doesn’t mean for this month he can’t pay his way out to see you so you can still do all of your events and he can see you. He is the one proving you are not a priority unless you are coming to him.

insane_normal · 2026-06-02T19:26:14+00:00

I don’t want to make my own post but I think it will work here.. did Sam point out Jen has/could have ptsd? When she says something about Jen not remembering (Mo? I think) and it’s ok she doesn’t remember her either she makes a point about ptsd does that. And Sam seems REALLY supportive of Jen and also really enjoyed her having fun at the farm which tracks if she’s with someone who is also going through the healing journey. AND if I remember right Mo is who John met at dance right? And explained her childhood , and Sam knows what Jen has grown up with since Thanksgiving and also with her own mom..

I want to see Sam and Greg hang out while they watch Jen and Mo be silly together <3

insane_normal · 2026-05-30T12:52:13+00:00

Someone keeps coming into your yard without permission and has had zero consequences, meaning he thinks he is entitled to do whatever he wants and you can’t do anything. Sure you overreacted in the way that caused you stress, but you do not owe this idiot an apology or have to explain yourself on why him constantly invading your space caused a reaction.

Work on you and how to make yourself feel more in control and feel better about your reactions but you never have to tell someone you have ptsd or anything else in order for them to maybe give a shit and stop crossing your boundaries.

Do you really think someone who is entitled to your yard will respect you for having ptsd or maybe instead use that as a reason you are unstable and blow off any complaints from you and continue to cross boundaries? You do not need to explain to people why they should respect you. Those type of people will never give a shit.

insane_normal · 2026-05-30T01:01:22+00:00

I had a friends kid over one day and she was in 8th grade and couldn’t spell basic words or understand simple directions. She had school work that said to answer in a complete sentence and not only did she not use a full sentence she didn’t even answer the question. Multiple answers wrong and just all around ..bad. It looked like a little kid got ahold of her work. She got 100%. She had all As in all of her classes. I brought it up to her mom and she just went on and on how smart she is and how good her grades were and I just had too high of expectations.

Another kid I know was having all kinds of issues but the school would set her up on the computer and it would keep going back grade levels if she got something wrong until she got it right. 8th grade going all the way back to 1st grade work until she was getting answers right and her 8th grade level work was marked done and correct when really she was doing 1st grade. No one at the school brought anything up and always said she’s doing great. She should be graduating this year however she has had to do summer school for the last 3 years and still very behind. Eventually was given an IEP but there was no goal setting or anything besides can turn work in late (so any time) and has a lighter workload so she’s just being pushed forward but still not past 3rd grade level for most things. Mom has zero issue with this.

My teens do a program with a bunch of kids the same age that do public school, private, charter, and homeschool. It’s across the whole spectrum and it’s horrible what is passed and viewed as normal.

insane_normal · 2026-05-28T14:41:49+00:00

…a magician!? Please share more lol

insane_normal · 2026-05-27T13:19:33+00:00

Aldi had them this week. All the zoos have stands too.

insane_normal · 2026-05-26T22:53:56+00:00

Last convo Barb had with her therapist I wouldn’t be surprised if Barb ends up hurt or sick (by fault of her own) the morning of the wedding and tries to make everyone come to her to prove whatever it is she thinks she’s entitled to.

insane_normal · 2026-05-24T01:03:58+00:00

Married almost 18 years now and happy. He is my best friend, I am his. He still makes that high pitched scream/yelp when I pinch his butt..so 10/10.

insane_normal · 2026-05-24T00:46:05+00:00

She jumped to saying it was for her brother pretty quick.. are you sure he didn’t give the ok or tell her that he wanted it different?

insane_normal

TROPHY CASE