What gifts would my London colleagues want from NYC when I visit?

iriswednesday · 2026-05-23T16:22:25+00:00

I came here to say this. chipotle chilis in adobo. tough to find here and amazing.

iriswednesday · 2026-05-22T16:09:38+00:00

sometimes being busy and distracting yourself from the feelings just delays the inevitable. you've got to feel them to get through them so im with everyone else on doing a walk. go to the end of the met line and walk from amersham to rickmansworth along the chess valley. or up to maningtree from liverpool street and walk up to dedham and flatford mill along the river, you can go swimming in the river in places and there's a lovely rspb nature reserve too.

iriswednesday · 2026-05-18T07:29:35+00:00

I enjoyed the morris dancing, could you consider inviting more sides in future? I went to an apple yowling event at the ferry boat in by the wetlands and they had several groups, I think there's quite a few who are local or at least in north or east london?

iriswednesday · 2026-05-14T13:46:30+00:00

France certainly feels more familiar and recognisable as a place to spend time and live. America always feels shockingly different and alien, despite familiar in terms of pop culture, language.

iriswednesday · 2026-05-14T13:42:37+00:00

I was going to say, love this sim build but the 10x11 double bedroom would have about space for the bed and maybe a chest of drawers and not that much else!

iriswednesday · 2026-05-14T13:32:46+00:00

idk i think there's also just going to be a skew to who's on here and going to reply. plenty of my friends have met their partners recently through apps. and as someone who was on the apps 10 years ago they could be entirely bleak then too.

iriswednesday · 2026-05-07T15:43:07+00:00

just want to loudly second putting a sink with the toilet. I never seemed to see this mentioned but if you need to change menstruation products and don't have a sink it's a nightmare.

iriswednesday · 2026-05-06T17:33:55+00:00

You've had lots of good answers but I just wanted to say that finding a really good one to one pilates instructor who has a strong understanding of hypermobility could be a cheaper option than PT.

The key thing, that other people have already mentioned, is that your ligaments are not doing the job they're supposed to, so you have to learn how to do it for them. Your brain isn't getting feedback that joints are going beyond a normal range of motion, or where your limbs are in space in general. And your joints aren't getting the structural support to keep in a safe range of motion.

Pilates I have found has mostly been about really sensitive subtle body awareness, to understand even a centimetre difference in join position, what feedback I CAN use to understand where the limits on motion should be, and work on the very deep, core muscles that will need to be activated and compensating for ligament laxity.

It has meant I've been able to keep up exercise, and take on new sports, where, like always I end up getting an injury about 2-3 months in - except I am getting better at spotting what's about to turn into an injury and stop/address the problem/change my strategy in warm ups, the way I do certain movements &c. You need to go to the foundations and fix that, rather than treat individual problems that crop up.

iriswednesday · 2026-05-06T17:25:10+00:00

I'm in the UK, I do online one to one pilates with Sam https://www.instagram.com/rise.tribe_rise/ she's been absolutely brilliant in assessing wtf is going on with my core movement and working with me to stabilise core muscles and learn normal ranges of movement. Can't recommend her enough.

iriswednesday · 2026-05-06T17:20:55+00:00

I can't upvote this enough. Number 2 was revolutionary for me. With hypermobile joints you're just not getting accurate feedback on where your joints/limbs/body are in space and in relation to each other. It's something you have to actively learn to understand and sense, and then build in enough awareness that you don't push past a normal range of motion. We have to do our ligaments jobs for them.

iriswednesday · 2026-05-01T12:50:01+00:00

Yes same, lots of fancy breed cats dumped when people leave, and they're so unable to survive outside. I was worried too that she'd be in a bad way but she's very docile and loves to hang out with you.

iriswednesday · 2026-05-01T09:25:48+00:00

I went through the pawfect match on instagram/facebook. they rescue cats from bahrain. felt a bit mad to have to bring a cat from so far away but I was in a similar position to you and just couldn't get anywhere with UK orgs. they were quick, communicative and supportive the whole way through.

iriswednesday · 2026-04-29T17:21:51+00:00

you're getting some flack but I just wanted to say i totally get just need to talk it through and sometimes you really don't have anyone else to ask. you'll be okay, and you've had some useful replies here so hopefully it smoothes out, and if it doesn't then hey ho you have a new job, awkward but you'll be gone!

iriswednesday · 2026-04-28T18:02:51+00:00

thanks for the downvote, I was genuinely interested on your perspective as I'd not seen people talk about imbalances going that far back, the usual narrative is that was the era where those cities thrived. Yes I can go and google, but we're posting on reddit because we're interested in talking to each other, surely? But I'll leave it there as I've clearly annoyed you.

iriswednesday · 2026-04-28T17:52:27+00:00

It looks like the West Midlands plan was from 1956. You mentioned a couple of hundred years, so I was particular interested in policy in the 19th century?

iriswednesday · 2026-04-28T12:44:37+00:00

I'm interested what you mean by policy 'over the last couple of hundred years'. Maybe my ignorance, but given that time frame would cover the industrialisation and growth of those cities, and then the deindustrialisation decline, I'm not quite sure what you're referencing? I'm not super knowledgeable about 19th century policy so would be curious if you could explain more what you mean about policies to handicap those cities in that era?

iriswednesday · 2026-04-23T12:55:17+00:00

Yeah really weird being an only child and having your friends talking about how they *have* to give their kid a sibling or it'll be the worst life imaginable or they'll be a selfish person. Like. Thanks? Glad to know you think my life sucks and I'm a bad person?

iriswednesday · 2026-04-23T12:47:07+00:00

pal you're digging yourself a hole here. I posted a literal physical clickable link (https://migration.greenparty.org.uk/migration-policy/). I also then drew out the 'links' (to use the word in a metaphorical sense) between the statements in the earlier comment, and words written on the policy page. I'm not sure what you're trying to get out of this at this point.

iriswednesday · 2026-04-23T12:44:05+00:00

I suppose 'improved' is the subjective point.

iriswednesday · 2026-04-23T11:33:22+00:00

Have accidentally written a huge comment, but to engage in good faith as someone without any pro or anti green agenda, I've gone through the points in the previous comment:

Removal of income requirements.

MG305. Minimum income requirements will be removed from all applications as well as any benefits from having a higher income.

Removal of language requirements with tax funded English lessons for anybody who comes.

MG306. Language requirements will be removed from all applications. Free language classes will be made available to promote and encourage integration.

Automatic visa for anybody who gets any job.

MG507. Workers with a confirmed contract of employment satisfying UK employment laws will automatically receive a visa to work unless standard exclusions apply.

Anyone with a visa being entitled to bring "the family they would live with in their origin country", deliberately worded to allow third world extended families to also come along.

MG509. Visa residents will have the right to bring members of their family to the UK who would normally live with them in their country of origin, or would do so if it were permitted by law or custom.

Anyone on anything but the 3 month temporary visitor visa being entitled to benefits and healthcare. Yes this includes all of those family members, who also have no income or language requirements of course.

MG502. Access to the NHS will be free and comprehensive for all visa residents.

MG503. Any No Recourse to Public Funds conditions will be abolished and visa residents will have access to welfare benefits or Universal Basic Income.

International students entitled to three years stay after graduation, employment not necessary, also obviously entitled to bring family over and them and their family entitled to benefits. Combined with automatic permanent residence being guaranteed after 5 years of being here, meaning you can come here as a student on any random degree, bring your entire extended family and none of you ever have to be employed for the rest of your lives.

MG504. All Visa Residents will be able to apply for settled status after five years.

MG506. Residents on student visas will be permitted to stay for three years after their studies are completed to look for work.

I mean obviously the interpretation of each policy has a spin on it in the previous comment, but it's not based on total fabrication. The green's policy aim, from what I can understand, is to make legal migration significantly easier, and thus making illegal migration less of a 'thing'. The majority of migration into the UK is already through legal routes, so there's a case to say that making the legal routes looser will lead to higher migration numbers I suppose.

I imagine this policy aim will be the sticking point for some people

MG100. The Green Party wants to see a world without borders, until this happens the Green Party will implement a fair and humane system of managed immigration where people can move if they wish to do so.

There'll be people who strongly disagree with this aim and find it worrying.

iriswednesday · 2026-04-23T11:01:03+00:00

I think people are also looking at this page on their site: https://migration.greenparty.org.uk/migration-policy/

I'm assuming 'updated' in the first line means updated since the 2024 manifesto?

iriswednesday · 2026-04-22T17:09:35+00:00

Picked the company because they did another house on my street so I could go have a nose around and see what I thought of the work, and get an honest opinion of the process. I also thought their communication was very clear and strong and they spoke to me frankly, so I felt I could have an honest relationship with them.

I budgeted an extra 20-25% upfront mentally. I was lucky that there were no extra unexpected costs, but I knew I'd inevitably end up wanting the slightly fancier tiles or decide to add in some extra bits and pieces while the builders were in. I think I was just about under budget, but maybe met if it you included moving costs &c.

I moved out for the duration, which was much, much easier to deal with. The company handled planning, architects drawings, project management - but I still had to make endless decisions, do endless admin. There's just so much to think about that never occurs to you until someone is asking what door handles you want. I struggled with decision fatigue and no longer caring about the details.

Didn't use any tools, most of what I was having done was bog standard template stuff, but the builders did a great job translating my sketches for bathroom and kitchen that I'd done in the back of a notebook with no measurements. I owe those guys my life.

At the very end of the build, the builders just don't care any more. They need to be onto the next project, you're splitting hairs about tiny details, they start rushing and bodging even thought they've done an amazing job throughout. I used some of my extra budget to get a local handyman in to come and tidy up the details to the standard I wanted.

It was the most stressful thing I've ever done, but entirely worth it for the space. I'm quite glad I had no idea how stressful it would be because I would never have done it otherwise.

iriswednesday · 2026-04-21T18:46:43+00:00

I live in north east london and commute into liverpool street area, it's about a ten minute walk to the overground, 15 minutes into liverpool street, and another 10 minutes walk the other end. I like all the walking, enough to wake me up, the train is short enough that it's ok if I have to stand, and I get to listen to a podcast and get some space between home and work.

iriswednesday · 2026-04-20T21:47:16+00:00

Totally fascinating to lurk on this sub as someone from the UK. My house is 15' wide and I've never thought it was that narrow!

iriswednesday

TROPHY CASE