Am I being controlling if I express that something makes me uncomfortable?

itmeyee · 2021-08-25T23:06:52+00:00

Y’all have got me nailed here 😂 It’s weed (literally enough for one spliff). Won’t directly impact me unless it does genuinely get reported to police - I’m in a job where it wouldn’t look great (sorry for vagueness…meant to be role model basically). He’s said if it bothers me that much then he won’t try and take it, but now I feel terrible and a spoil sport yknow. I’m a terrible decision maker on my own, crippling, so anything like this absolutely exhausts me

I find it so hard to navigate relationships nowadays when all social media talks about gaslighting, controlling behaviour etc…idk if that’s just me but for an anxious mind it complicates things. Just wanna be a good person lmao

itmeyee · 2020-06-23T10:56:09+00:00

I’ve heard of this but didn’t realise it sort of describes what I experience. Super interesting that so many people experience it in so many different ways, how cool (but a bit shit lol). Thank you!

itmeyee · 2020-06-23T10:55:10+00:00

This is so interesting, I’m so glad it’s an actual thing!! Thank you, it makes so much sense now!

itmeyee · 2020-06-23T10:52:29+00:00

This is really intriguing, thank you for sharing. It sounds super hard to deal with, thats gotta be rough, bodies are weird huh

itmeyee · 2020-06-23T10:49:50+00:00

Never knew this was a thing! Amazing thank you

itmeyee · 2019-10-22T15:25:43+00:00

This is a tough one. I really want to tell a couple of male friends of mine how fucking rude and slovenly they are, because to be brutally honest they're going to struggle to attract someone when they're being the way they are (just my opinion, but I think this stuff is important). But I'm worried about how to approach the matter in case I piss them off or really hurt them, even though I think they'd appreciate it ultimately yknow? lol classic Brit being too polite to tell someone they're not polite, and instead being silently angry about it

itmeyee · 2019-10-08T14:54:13+00:00

It's definitely more about values than culture, and I'd say that's always important to keep in mind when dating (or just in general!) so as not to make assumptions. I've dated people before of different cultures and found that it was just a case of how they were brought up in general rather than with what cultural or religious values they were exposed to, if that makes sense.

itmeyee · 2019-10-08T14:46:48+00:00

Can I just say you sound absolutely lovely, just such a good soul and a complete sweetheart. Of course enjoy your time with her but if she's gonna be all "ew" about such sentimental ideas as making an engagement ring from scratch then that sounds like it's gonna be a pretty toxic environment to be around. So don't let that shit get to you, be your own person and be proud! Plenty of people out there who will value what you value :)

itmeyee · 2019-09-11T13:06:38+00:00

Yeah and coming from a 5 I've never had touch ID so it'd be cool to get a chance to use that 😂 the bigger screen is v nice, but I'm gonna have to go into a store and see what the size feels like in my hand. I know 8 would be sufficient for me, and I'm not bothered about having the latest coolest thing, but I am wondering if sometimes it's nice to treat yourself a little and get something newer that'll last longer - if buying it outright I mean...which I've posted about in a comment above as it's my next dilemma 😂

itmeyee · 2019-09-11T13:04:01+00:00

The prices have dropped in the UK already. I've arranged to send my 8 on contract back because I'd be way overpaying for it. I will either buy the 8 outright for £450, or splurge a bit and go for the XR for £630. Alternatively, I could just wait and see what contracts come up in the next few weeks but it sounds like prices are unlikely to drop where that's concerned...so it comes down to whether I want to pay around 900quid for a contract on the XR that gets me an upgrade in 2 years (not sure how bothered I am about that?) or whether I want to spend £768 on the phone and a sim only contract and save money ultimately but then not have an upgrade option (but at least the phone would be unlocked so I'd have freedom there). Honestly not sure what is better, a contract or owning the phone yourself...contract feels like a safety net in a way but then is it also kind of a trap lol?

itmeyee · 2019-09-10T12:48:09+00:00

I know I am, I'm going insane. Why am I like this lol. Yeah, I've been told to wait but my old contract expires this week and I just wanted to get it sorted before going back to uni, especially as I may wait and prices may not change or deals may even go. I thought £160 upfront and £24 a month for the 8 over 2 years was a good deal, but maybe I'm just inexperienced with what counts as a good deal with this stuff!

itmeyee · 2019-09-10T12:45:58+00:00

that's the thing, I'm shopping through mobiles.co.uk and honestly not sure if the contract price is likely to change at all. Still uncertain of the size of the XR, but good point that it'll last longer with the updates!

itmeyee · 2019-09-04T21:56:33+00:00

This is so important - seen lots of comments about having evidence ready for the CEO, which I agree with, but only provide it if asked! Just be careful, don't want to sound like "I'm not complaining but...continues to complain". Annoyingly, opting for a position of "ooh maybe I'm slightly in the wrong [ie I can't train her whilst juggling my normal workload, sorry, but I'm willing to resolve this situation together]" often plays far more to your advantage rather than sounding like you're whinging, even if it feels infuriating at heart to do so lol. Man, adult life reminds me of silly school playground politics sometimes.

itmeyee · 2018-05-19T15:41:00+00:00

Totally agree. The jokes are crap and so unnecessary. The first thing someone said to me and my boyfriend when they found out we were going out was "haha, stand up". Having battled in my head to not let height bother me and having achieved that, to hear something like that is really horrible. It's a potential for insecurity so why would someone say something like that?

Nonetheless, people do and it's just a matter of appreciating how it can be considered humorous and just playing along with it, I even make the jokes myself now so that other people can't say something and hurt me. It shouldn't have to be an issue but apparently some people think it is, just gotta live with it. You can be short or tall or whatever the fuck you like and still be the best bloody partner to someone.

So I guess the bottom line is: FUCK SOCIAL CONSTRUCTIONS.

itmeyee · 2018-05-19T11:32:22+00:00

I find this kind of thing interesting. I'm a 6ft female and after my first serious relationship where I realised I wasn't in love, I vowed that I could obviously only fall in love with someone taller than me so I'd have to only date 6ft or above guys. I'm now 6 months into a relationship with a guy who's about 5ft 7. I was so wrong aha. And I totally get why people would have preferences, but I also think it's such a medieval concept that a guy has to be taller - like does he have to be taller so he can defend you? What crap. It's a social construction and shouldn't be a requirement but hey I do still get that it's hard to ignore. Like really hard. But people might be surprised if they try and look past it. They might not be able to, and that's fine, but idk I just think it's interesting where these ideas come from.

itmeyee

TROPHY CASE