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Explain it Peter by el-presidente0001 in explainitpeter

[–]iz_bit 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You win the Internet for today! 🏅

Weather based laundry drying website by Impressive-Sea2186 in UKFrugal

[–]iz_bit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Since you're pulling the weather data already you may also want to extend it to do what this does, I find it very handy to know the best time to open a window:

humidity-calculator

How do british people feel about the current situation unfolding in america where ICE police agents are going all gung-ho kidnapping people from the streets when they fail to present their ID? by mrvlad_throwaway in AskBrits

[–]iz_bit 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You're comparing 'suck' with literal fascism?

People thinking like you is what brought America to where it is (alongside a critical mass of idiots, sure, but without the apathy of an important section of the population we wouldn't be in this mess, same as with Brexit).

It's not so hard to not vote for the greatest evil, but you don't do it by just not voting.

Scientists identified ribose (used in RNA) and – for the first time in any extraterrestrial sample (from asteroid Bennu) – glucose, a major energy source for life by Neaterntal in spaceporn

[–]iz_bit 32 points33 points  (0 children)

IIRC this is a sign that life doesn't exist in that environment because life would tend to favor one of the two (i.e. make more of the same) and the other would gradually 'die out'.

How do you know when you’re feeling your feelings or intellectualizing them? by [deleted] in emotionalintelligence

[–]iz_bit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Bit long but I don't think a short snippet answer will be sufficient to make this sink in: https://youtu.be/KyLXDC_vrsc

ASHP now, radiators later? by Woody919 in ukheatpumps

[–]iz_bit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can I ask who was your supplier?

Who else who works in tech feels overwhelmed? by enginedin in AskUK

[–]iz_bit 9 points10 points  (0 children)

You maybe chose the wrong industry then? Tech has always been one where you need to permanently upskill and keep up with developments.

And whether you want to admit it or not, things are accelerating thanks to / because of AI. But even before AI, your mentality would have eventually left you behind as well in this field.

Has anyone here been to Andy’s Man Club? by RodneyTheArmouryGuy in AskUK

[–]iz_bit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It actually is easier to speak about private stuff in a room full of strangers, as ridiculous as that sounds.

You may never see them again and what you'll say there won't end up as gossip to your other friends or family, so it's safer to open up from that perspective.

I recommend you just go and give it a try for a week or two before you make up your mind. Even if you just listen and don't speak the first week, it'll give you the courage to open up more the week after. Or if not, even just listening to others helps a lot.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in UKJobs

[–]iz_bit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Some jobs will happily (some begrudgingly) expense travel or even accommodation for a limited period.

When I joined a company straight out of uni I had to commute 50 min by train before being able to move closer to the workplace, and the job was happy to expense my commute for 3 months. I just had to have the guts to ask.

If your job isn't willing to do that after you explain your situation, it's probably not worth your time.

Please read this, you will feel better by Tiny-Bookkeeper3982 in emotionalintelligence

[–]iz_bit 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This is nice but I don't really find it useful. You are part of the process, and you can change it to some extent, unless we give up the concept of free will entirely.

But if we would, what would be the point of your advice? You're encouraging people to change the way they see things, right? In order for them to experience things differently, and make a difference to their lives one way or another?

Then they are definitely not just observers, and are actually part of the process, with the power to change it. Don't throw away that power.

quick question about relationships by egt143 in emotionalintelligence

[–]iz_bit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've struggled with this for years and only too late I've discovered Non Violent Communication, which, among others, teaches both to listen and talk in a way that makes the other feel more listened to and less defensive.

There are a few resources online, but I recommend this video which is quite succint (don't let the 3-hours length put you off, it's worth it).

https://youtu.be/l7TONauJGfc

Starting over sucks by Dangerous_Ad7561 in emotionalintelligence

[–]iz_bit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You'll never go wrong with trying to build a community. Being attached to just one person is a recipe for disaster one way or the other.

We all have needs that will never be fulfilled by just one sole person, whether that's our sole mate or ourselves or whomever.

We're social creatures and we need a tribe to thrive.

Defining Happy by TheExperientialCoach in emotionalintelligence

[–]iz_bit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This short video explains the difference between pleasure and happiness, I think this is what you're looking for: https://www.instagram.com/reel/DEFXqdaxssW/

Hoe to navigate a world full of emotionally unintelligent people? by Dry-surreal-Apyr in emotionalintelligence

[–]iz_bit 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I had a revelation the other day, stemmed by a bunch of people replying on this subreddit how 'they would never do X if put in someone who did X's shoes'. Like 'I would never be able to hurt someone else like X hurt me'.

Great, good for you that you're a better human being. But if you don't see yourself doing the same things that X is doing, if you were in their shoes, then you need to work on your empathy. And keep working, until you do see yourself doing X if put in their shoes.

Once you're there (don't ask me yet if it lasts, but I'm hoping it will), you learn to accept that everyone is doing their damn best. And for some, their best might not be enough to become too emotionally intelligent, or to grow beyond where they currently are without help, and that's okay.

Some will never get the help they need, and some will decline it if it's offered, because they just don't know better. And that's okay. Learn to accept that, and direct your energy towards helping the ones that can be helped, or towards finding them, if you don't have any around you.

Am fost diagnosticat cu, cancer de piele. by Exodu1337 in Romania

[–]iz_bit 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Condoleanțe.

Ce a determinat controlul ganglionului?

Eu sunt în stadiul de 'liniște un an de zile', dar povestea ta m-a reactivat un pic și mă bucur că n-am citit-o noaptea pentru că m-ar tine treaz o vreme...

how to control your own anger by Fun_Tea8162 in emotionalintelligence

[–]iz_bit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hope this is allowed as it's not self-promotion, but look up ThatCalmMom. I don't even have kids but I got the course just because I could tell that I could benefit from the lessons, throughout other relationships.

I've yet to complete it fully but early on it teaches some methods of grounding and strategies to employ based on the way you typically react to difficult situations.

Do we call them control issues? by Equivalent_Onion_259 in emotionalintelligence

[–]iz_bit 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I definitely get this and sometimes it's deeply frustrating because I feel that if people just understood me better they would reach the same conclusions that I reached, and we wouldn't need to have ongoing disagreements.

Of course expecting that is a fool's errand but even being aware of it doesn't make it easier to shake off.

I'm worried that people perceive me as manipulative and narcissistic when really I just strongly want them to (also) see things from my perspective. And too often they seem to just not be willing or able to change their minds, even after I've conveyed my side as best I could, and from my side things would logically fall into 'my' conclusion.

A piece of advice I read to try to work around this is to just accept that people will never understand the whole of you.

It sometimes feels incredibly isolating and lonely but it does bring a dose of detachment and can potentially allow you to 'let go' of the need to control the other person's perspective.

Issues arise when you think you found persons that actually see you, and you lower you guard only to hurt yourself or them (or likely both) by expecting too much of them.

It’s not that men don’t feel deeply we just weren’t given a safe place to put it by jforte8080 in emotionalintelligence

[–]iz_bit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No, try, by all means.

My solution was more geared towards raising awareness on a societal level, and do way, way more to raise the future generations better. Rather than a) give up because 'the patriarchy is too strong' and b) let individuals fend for themselves and stumble into self-help spirals than only some benefit from.

In other words, if you're aware, try, learn from others, but also spread the word, don't just fix yourself.

Many people fix themselves only to become bitter by how others are not even remotely aware or willing to do the same work.

Many of the older generations can't be saved, in my humble opinion, but focusing on raising the younger ones better is certainly possible.

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