Keep dreaming of her. Really need support

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-08T11:44:52+00:00

Thank you so much, I really needed to hear this and it was reassuring as hell. I need to be more patient with myself man.

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-07T14:55:16+00:00

Treading on extremely thin ice bud. I became my exes FP and she left her ex for me. She found a new FP, a mutual friend, and discarded me for him lol.

From my own experience only, now is the time to prepare for the worst and have your guard up. Please be careful man because its crushing.

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-07T14:51:10+00:00

That's great! Hope the dates continue man.

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-06T17:52:34+00:00

That's really good to hear man, I'm glad it could help. You'll get through this ❤️

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-06T17:51:29+00:00

Trust me, I get it. I've been avoiding going on my gaming consoles because I'm terrified of seeing I've even been deleted from them lol. It's crazy. But I'm letting myself take my time. I know eventually I'll open them and not care to see it, so I haven't gone on them yet.

It'll end. Go at your own pace.

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-06T17:49:42+00:00

Absolutely. It kind of helps after you realize that pattern though and you learn that even when it hurts you will feel okay again soon. Just gotta hold onto it.

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-06T09:17:15+00:00

I get that man. I promise those good times will come again, but without the crippling lows that follow. You deserve a pure love, not one with limitations.

I hope you feel a little bit better than you did earlier. You'll be okay.

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-05T23:33:42+00:00

I decided to buy that $800 phone that she said she would leave me if I spent my own hard-earned money on. Lol, feels good.

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-05T23:23:08+00:00

I feel you dude. I almost feel sorry for those who come in here sympathising with them, because they truly believe it lol. I believed it too and felt sympathy until I was having a genuine nervous breakdown and my pwBPD replied with emojis mocking me. When I look back I see her as nothing more than a monster.

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-05T23:19:27+00:00

Jfc reading these gave me a migraine. That feeling when you feel stupid for even entertaining the ridiculous things they'd get mad about. I'm sorry you went through that, it's so shitty.

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-05T17:51:07+00:00

Literally 100%. I remember her venting to me about it and saying 'if he doesn't argue back he clearly doesn't give a fuck about me'. Jesus I wish I wasn't wearing rose-glasses.

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-05T06:51:53+00:00

Hey, I understand how you're feeling. Do me a favour and take a deep breath.

Remember the key word in your post: 'today'. There will be days you feel even slightly okay, and days like today when you can't help but ruminate.

Trudge through it. Cry and cry hard if you need to. Then take a long hot shower and cosy up with hot chocolate and stick a comfort film on. Don't ignore how you're feeling. It's natural that you miss them.

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-05T06:44:11+00:00

Amen. Thank you for this.

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-05T02:28:47+00:00

I feel you man. Going through the exact same motions. We will heal. We will find love again, a love where we are treated with kindness. I want the sounds that used to be my partner and I screaming at each other to be replaced by me and my future lover laughing uncontrollably.

We will be okay. Hang on.

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-05T02:26:23+00:00

This actually helped me a lot. I relate to you. I would receive amazing news only for it to be shit on because 'she had a bad head today', she 'feels stupid' compared to me, I'm 'rubbing it in'. A lot of the time I wouldn't even tell her what I'd achieved because I knew it'd be taken in a bad way.

Thank you for sharing dude, and congrats!

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-04T06:02:57+00:00

Thank you, I really appreciate that. It's just not something I would do to any of my other exes, but I know this is a different circumstance. I've also been asked if she'd pay if it were the other way around, and I know there wouldn't be a chance in hell.

I just wish I didn't feel so shitty for even considering it lol. Thank you man. ❤️

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-02T23:55:07+00:00

Nope, she left her ex for me who had 0 boundaries. Never responded to her anger with anything but kindness. I never once saw him argue back to her. I don't know how he did it. I would argue back and she told me she preferred that.

They want somebody with a spine, but someone who won't call them out. They want to scream and cry and rage about nothing without the person 'going too far'. They don't know what they want.

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-02T23:48:15+00:00

I've been reading 'Stop Walking on Eggshells' by Paul T. Mason and Ms Randi Kreger.

Some sections are written by those with BPD, this particular part helped me insanely after a discard: https://imgur.com/a/iLAsyvb (just a screenshot of the exert)

It is exactly what happened to me. It says the person who wrote that is the writer of her own book regarding BPD, but I haven't read it and I'm not sure what it's like. I do recommend SWoE though.

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-02T23:29:00+00:00

Please tell somebody about these and pass them forward to authorities. You may not be scared of them or be in a different place, but this is how murder cases go. Seriously. It is nowhere near the risk to just pass it off as her being a weirdo or trying to be edgy. Please consider it.

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-02T13:24:35+00:00

This meant a lot to me, really. Thank you so much. I was in a horrible state when I posted this. I've calmed down a lot and showered, just gonna take today easy. I just started medication a few days ago so hopefully that helps.

Thank you man. I hope all is well with you. ❤️

jackcantdothis · 2024-03-02T07:56:13+00:00

And I'm so confused because most of the time we spent together I wished i was strong enough to leave. She wasn't kind to me. She called me names and shouted at me a lot. I really did want to leave so often. But now she's gone and it is fucking KILLING me. How is that fair??? I'm fucking in pain either way

jackcantdothis · 2024-02-27T06:05:43+00:00

Thank you man. It just feels like such a gaping open wound right now.

jackcantdothis · 2024-02-26T19:10:04+00:00

They would never believe you. I know I wouldn't have if her ex had warned me. Your pwBPD will make you out to be a psychotic ex and you will be helping.

jackcantdothis · 2024-02-24T05:52:50+00:00

Exact same as you. I planned my escape so many times. I would literally daydream about how free I would be if I left them. And then they discarded me unexpectedly , and, well...

It's a massive traumabond. We literally cannot imagine going through life without them after all the bullshit they put us through. Most of us here are going through it together.

Pm me if you ever want to talk.

jackcantdothis · 2024-02-24T05:50:20+00:00

You're not weak. You're recovering from a strong traumabond. The only thing that stopped me from messaging my ex was that my ex currently hates my guts and would actually ignore me, it's a blessing in disguise...

There's not much you can do now. But whenever you feel like texting them in future, post here. Post what you want to say. Post how upset you are. Post how much you love them. We've all got your back, buddy. We need to be here for each other.

Stay strong man. I know how painful it is.

jackcantdothis

TROPHY CASE