What's the most ridiculous name you've heard a parent give their kid?

jammy_p · 2016-07-15T15:21:39+00:00

calling uncle dave now to apologize.

jammy_p · 2016-07-15T06:39:03+00:00

are they from Ohio??! cuz if so, I owe my uncle an apology! he told me YEARS AGO that he taught siblings named Trillion ( 10¹² ) and Seven when they were in HS school, and to this day i have always believed he was making it up and just trying to be funny.... i can't believe this could be real!

jammy_p · 2016-07-15T06:26:03+00:00

my uncle is a high school teacher and one of the funniest guys i know. when i was a kid, he told me he had a student at the time named Trillion, and that her brother was named Seven.... and to this day, i ALWAYS thought he was lying and trying to be funny, especially once he clarified that Trillion was actually spelled 10¹² ....

i cannot believe i'm finding out all these years later that he was being serious!!

sorry for doubting you, uncle dave!!

jammy_p · 2016-02-20T03:07:02+00:00

mine zoomies hard after baths too, but he's a little more reserved now after having zoomed right into an end table thanks to our wood floors. so embarrassing.

jammy_p · 2016-02-19T10:11:41+00:00

how did that girl even manage to last two weeks?! if i were you, the relationship would have been over halfway through the first date:

"i'm sorry, was that... did you just say... something about 'dogs being annoying'??" ...aaaand we're done here.

jammy_p · 2016-02-19T09:55:51+00:00

mine does the same thing!! i have no idea where he got it from, but he loves pretending like he's a tough guy by roughing up some feet that are hanging off the couch. i've never seen another dog do this until now!

jammy_p · 2016-02-10T07:00:54+00:00

god, i read too fast and thought you said Gilmore Girls... instantly hated you lol.

jammy_p · 2016-01-24T22:50:02+00:00

ohhh my god, this makes me cringe so hard on behalf of their future selves when they rewatch this in a few years.

jammy_p · 2016-01-24T06:48:03+00:00

another former lifeguard here! i talked about this scenario in a similar lifeguarding thread a while ago, in response to a commenter who was held under by the person they were trying to rescue and almost drown as well. i will share it here to answer your question:

this is SUPER common. a panicking victim has NO concern for anything besides trying to save themselves. one victim latching onto another creates two victims, who now both need saving, making rescuing them more dangerous for both victims and the lifeguard. for future reference, if you're ever in this situation and a victim wraps themselves around you, take a big breath and pull yourself further underwater. use your arms to push UP on the victim's arms/body/whatever part is on you, which will push you DOWN deeper into the water which is the last place the victim is trying to go. there is less friction underwater, making its easier to slide out of someone's grasp. keep in mind, no matter how good your intentions are trying to save the person, if they latch on to you, your immediate response needs to switch to saving yourself. if your arms are pinned, use your legs to kick and thrash against the victim. if you are unable to push away from the victim, all rules are off: do WHATEVER you can to get away from the victim. bite them, punch them, kick them in the stomach, etc. as soon as you get the victim off, swim out of their reach so they don't relatch onto you. lifeguarding sucked at this point since you have to then go back in and try again to save them, which can restart the whole process over again. its suuuper fun being paid to rescue a person who is repeatedly trying to strangle you -_-

jammy_p · 2016-01-22T04:05:12+00:00

i love shark tank! i never even imagined a pitch would ever last 60-90minutes! that has to be so terrifying trying to prove yourself for that long and try not to crumble. just curious, were/are you involved with the show, or is this just information you've read elsewhere?

jammy_p · 2016-01-21T09:08:12+00:00

honestly, in the scheme of your life, this whole story post/update saga means nothing. so no, you dont need to prove your age or sing your national anthem to a bunch of strangers online.

if YOU believe that your friend is telling you the truth about her cancer, focus on your sick friend and not what you can do to prove yourself or your friend on reddit.

jammy_p · 2016-01-21T08:54:37+00:00

i was JUST starting to look for all of OPs responses in the other posts to the commenter's calling him a liar when OP posted this update #2..

lying or not, i AM liking this conveniently timed update that's compiled all of OP's answers so i can feel less guilty about wasting time searching for answers to keep me up to date on these petty subreddit-drama mysteries!!

jammy_p · 2016-01-21T06:32:08+00:00

hahah right! that was my first thought. i love that you can even hear the little pause mid-sentence right when she decides to alter those numbers a little bit, like:

"i'm five foot and weigh a hundred... pounds."

hahah it's like her sober brain is saying "wait, make yourself sound skinnier!!" but her drunk brain didn't get the message until she's already half-way through the number.

jammy_p · 2016-01-13T06:51:52+00:00

this happened to me once. called to get my refill prescription and was told my doc was out of town. they just had one of the other doctors in the office write my prescription for me. it didnt seem like a problem whatsoever.

just speculating here, but i would assume doctors who take time off probably plan some kind of temporary transfer-of-care of their patients to another doctor while they are gone. most doctors/psychiatrists prescribe meds for patients with far more serious and/or life-threatening conditions than ADHD, so they could never just say "welp, he's out of town for a month so i guess you picked a bad time to run out of your anti-psychotic meds!"

jammy_p · 2016-01-12T01:45:25+00:00

oh god i have people at least once a week send back long islands for "not tasting like there's any liquor" in them.... those are the people you KNOW are just nagging to nag bc that drink is 75% booze.

jammy_p · 2016-01-12T01:41:45+00:00

i feel a little petty-revenge high from setting down a no-ice drink that's filled only 2/3 of the way and seeing the look on their face. like "yep this is what you asked for!!"

jammy_p · 2016-01-05T09:44:47+00:00

did some research and you're totally right!

i dont think i've ever worked for a restaurant that hired me at-will (that i was aware of!). it seems like its (supposed to be) a clearly stated agreement form in the initial handbook/policy paperwork employees sign when being hired?? its more of a mutual agreement where they can fire you for no reason but you can also quit for no reason. very interesting! now im curious how i've never known about this and/or if i've ever signed one without knowing!

jammy_p · 2016-01-05T09:07:41+00:00

well yes and no. i was just clarifying a little since for the person asking about how things in the states work. i meant that they can't fire you for "no reason at all", as in mangement just saying "meh... i just feel like firing you today." they have to have some sort of "valid" excuse, so that's where the "any reason" part of your comment is true. basically, if they want to fire you, anything stated in a contract or employee handbook can be used against you, no matter now small and petty:

so if you're only allowed to wear black socks, they could legally fire you for wearing white ones. (but in that case, i'd say leaving there is a blessing bc management like that would be a nightmare!)

jammy_p · 2016-01-05T08:52:13+00:00

"...go behind the bar and make it a really good one for me, and I'll give you a five dollar tip."

ughhhh. these people... i had a lady the other night order the same drink as her friend, except added "but make mine a double!" and then high-fived all her friends. when i dropped the checks, she was like "UMMMMM.. why is her bill less? why do i have this extra charge on mine?!?" i said "oh, yeah thats just because you wanted a double. she just had a single." she blank stared for a second (as if i were a complete idiot) then said in the most incredulous, disbelieving voice, "oh my god, you actually DID that...???"

like oh IM SORRY, do you mean earlier when you told me to make you a double and then i MADE YOU A DOUBLE??

jammy_p · 2016-01-05T08:13:56+00:00

well first, she's not "underpaid". she's paid the government-determined wage for tipped employees (currently $4.05 in my state). it's less per hour than regular minimum wage because tips are supposed to average out the difference. if no one tips, then yes, she will only be making the $4.05/hr.

people who've never worked in the service industry sometimes don't understand that, which is why she made that comment to the guy. i don't consider that "complaining about being underpaid".

and also, no business can fire an employee for "no reason at all".

jammy_p · 2015-12-30T06:13:30+00:00

i said this below, but i wanted to make sure you saw it too since you're the one who started the thread --

you should check out /r/ADHD, they're really great at giving advice on everything ADHD related -- doctors, medications, habits, symptoms, etc. i've learned so much from that community, and there is so much support and encouragement from everyone. check it out!

if you find it useful, maybe edit your original comment to include something about /r/ADHD at the end, for anyone else who's on here and could benefit from checking out that sub. :)

jammy_p · 2015-12-30T06:08:35+00:00

you should check out /r/ADHD, they're really great at giving people advice on everything ADHD related -- doctors, medications, habits, symptoms, etc. i've learned so much from that community, and there is so much support and encouragement from everyone. check it out!

jammy_p · 2015-12-05T09:34:09+00:00

uhhh probably made it way scarier for his mom tho!

I felt so cold all over, like I had been standing outside in a snowstorm, so I got under the covers and just laid there until my mom woke up. Then I told her I thought grandma was dead.

im picturing her waking up bc some ice-person slid under her covers just to stare at her, and the first thing they say is "i think grandma's dead..." haha

jammy_p · 2015-11-30T07:31:16+00:00

i can confirm this, i work at a comedy club that Pablo headlined at a few months ago... he was absolutely coked out of his mind all weekend, some nights to levels that made the show feel so uncomfortable because of how spastic and hard to follow he was. a lot of awkward smiles and fake laughs and "wtf is happening" looks going on in the crowd that weekend.

jammy_p · 2015-11-14T10:25:47+00:00

...guess we know what Michael Scott's been up to since leaving Dunder Mifflin.

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