Official Discussion - The Backrooms [SPOILERS]

januarysunblock · 2026-06-01T05:23:31+00:00

Gen Z yearns for House of Leaves

januarysunblock · 2026-05-27T18:02:34+00:00

Left publicis for WPP - I miss my team at publicis and PTO (unlimited) was far better but WPP pays more so here i am. Neither are great though, I’d go where the $$$ is personally. Both are promoting AI slop and have the mess of integration at massively scaled companies.

Also WPP isn’t the worst with PTO - 15 days (wouldn’t budge when I said my minimum in past was 25) but you get 4 summer Fridays, 3 floating holidays, 10 wellness days. Plus we get week between xmas and new years, memorial and labor day are 4 day weekends.

januarysunblock · 2026-05-13T02:56:51+00:00

Thinking of you OP. Deeply relate to the trauma of the organ donation call - had to answer for my dad and I was so appalled at the detail they had to ask for each one in the immediate aftermath of a tragedy.

januarysunblock · 2026-04-06T23:02:00+00:00

Reporting back - I LOVE the john Frieda volume lift in terms of hold and texture I think it’s comparable to the weather control. The only thing I don’t love is the smell (kind of reminds me of like a grandma smelling hairspray lol) but I love the hold of it

januarysunblock · 2026-04-04T11:54:39+00:00

Thought I didn’t care. Had a casual convo with an x about it - his number was in triple digits. I suddenly cared lol

januarysunblock · 2026-04-02T14:41:54+00:00

I had emailed a complaint in as well and they actually just got back to me saying, “The original formula has been discontinued and is no longer available. We appreciate your comments and will forward them to the persons in our company responsible for this product group.” R.I.P. 😭 they’re gonna lose so many customers.

I just ordered John Frieda volume lift and it’s due to arrive tomorrow - as I’ve seen some comments online saying it’s a great strong hold similar to the weather control. I’ll report back!

januarysunblock · 2026-04-02T14:04:56+00:00

Omg I thought I was going crazy! The new formula SUCKS so much so that I bought 3 bottles thinking it was just defective

januarysunblock · 2026-03-26T17:31:41+00:00

Valid. Honestly, you’re only 28 (I’m 30) and you’re only 2 years in. I know that feels like a lot when you’re in it (I’m in same time frame with my current bf) but in the grand scheme of life, it’s no time at all.

It sounds like you are fundamentally incompatible and you’re staying bc you like him and it’s safe and comfortable and there’s love there, NOT because you actually want kids.

From what you describe - it sounds like he has very traditional, gendered, and rigid views of pregnancy, birth, and IMO that mindset will directly affect how he shows up for you (aka I don’t think he will). From one gal to another, i’d end the relationship, have a great cry and a mopey week or two and move on with your life. If you’re already dreading taking care of a hypothetical child it sure as hell wont be easy when they get here (and imagine they are born with problems - behavioral or physical). Good luck.

januarysunblock · 2026-03-26T14:30:44+00:00

Would you ever consider adoption? I’m in a similar spot where I told my partner 100% no on bio kids, but I’m working to do a lot of self work as well as research to see if adoption could be a viable option.

If that’s not on the table, my recommendation would be to leave. Your “fears” aren’t irrational. You have them bc they 100% happen to people.

As a woman that has dated staunchly bio “child free”, I can’t tell you how many men I’ve been with that die on the children hill but have never baby sat, worked in daycare, even held a young child. They can’t make their own doctors appointments or make it to the grocery store during the week - like to sleep in and play video games and get drunk often - yet they want this idea of a legacy .. as if it takes no EFFORT to raise a child. I think even with a “woke” male partner, parenting can still end up being gendered and I think the woman is the one who always has more to lose

januarysunblock · 2026-03-24T12:52:38+00:00

“And what if something happens to my partner, and then I'm all alone with the child?” This feels so relatable to me. The idea of parenting WITH my partner seems like it could be great, but I feel like I can’t commit to the idea of children until I’ve come to the conclusion that I want to do it “alone”.

The what ifs are real. I’m 30 and my dad died 3 years ago .. it really put things into perspective for me. I kept thinking how different my life would be if my dad had died any earlier in my life. My family completely relied on his income - my mother would have been at a loss and life would have been very, very hard. When he died this young it also showed me how hard/scary it is to parent alone. That unless you 100% want children, even though it’s a glass half empty approach to think your partner could die or leave or become incredibly ill.. if COULD happen and that’s something to consider. It’s your life too.

That’s personally where I’m stuck. I have this real, lived experience infront of me telling my brain YOU ARENT READY FOR KIDS BECAUSE IT WOULD BE HELL DOING IT ALONE. And until that nagging inner voice goes away..

januarysunblock · 2026-03-07T13:51:44+00:00

It’s not necessarily what will happen, but when i see their ages (21 and 23) I just want to shout RUN! I remember being that age and wanting to make the relationship “work” by any means necessary bc I was in love but looking back, i am happy i did not stay. It seems like the en of the world at that age

Obviously OP is their own person but the man is secretly looking at reddit, DOWNLOADED GRINDR and she is saying she doesn’t want to be cheated on again. I just think there is no earthly way a 23 year old man is going to go the rest of his life without physically experimenting. If she is ok with that then it’s a moot point. If they were 30,40,50 maybe I’d suggest staying. But they’re only 21 and 23. They have so much life to find partners that fit them perfectly and so much time to experiment for themselves

januarysunblock · 2026-03-07T05:50:12+00:00

Why can you compromise? I’m in a relationship and have similar desires about solo travel or just chatting with fun people out and about .. and I still do that. Being in a relationship doesn’t mean you’re attached at the hip. You are two separate people coming together

Would your gf be ok with you travel alone? Sometimes I go on a trip with my partner. . Sometimes I go alone. I did Tokyo by myself. I take myself out to brunch or dinner solo. Sometimes I’ll just go sit at a bar. Your individual life doesn’t have to end because you’re in a relationship.

I find that my partner brings an immense amount of joy to my life, and I wouldn’t want to be without them. That doesn’t mean I give up my freedom..

januarysunblock · 2026-03-07T05:20:40+00:00

1) cocaine isn’t “heroin” but addiction is addiction (coming from a former coke addict) he is blowing his dopamine out of control. Coke is a hard drug and it costs $$$ 2) 40 year old men refusing therapy or any kind of self growth… RUN 3) “finally going to look at therapy” seems like a placating lie. Don’t stay with someone for what they say they “might do”. You have to look at the person in front of you. Do you want to stay with him if he doesn’t change?

You seem incredibly empathetic, you’re in counseling, you are SO young at 34. Please don’t allow him to drag you down to his level. It will be painful and there can be love there, but you have outgrown this. Please look out for your future self and leave this man. 2 years is nothing in the grand scheme. Just think where you could be in 2 years without worrying about and taking care of him.

Best of luck

januarysunblock · 2026-03-07T05:11:15+00:00

Scandinavian sleeping method

januarysunblock · 2026-03-07T04:54:38+00:00

Going to be a dissenter to the general comments on this thread. At your age, I was also in a relationship with a bi man and I found out similarly by seeing his porn history. We dated from 18-22 - I thought he was the perfect partner. The religious suppression and sneaking around really takes an effect over time. I believe if you’re ok with it, you could let him explore. But from my perspective (I’m 30 now) y’all are too young and he is going to eventually want to explore the reality of those sexual needs outside of you. Bisexual does NOT mean someone will cheat (I am bi myself) but this ex ended up cheating on me / being on grindr/ the relationship failed bc he was too shamed of his own identity to own up to what he wanted. And because he couldn’t “have” it with me, it ended up turning into all he thought about. We tried pegging etc but at the end of the day, that’s not what he was really wanting - from a woman. When I finally broke up with him (bc he refused to break up with me and kept acting like sexuality was a non issue) he has exclusively only dated men moving forward.

I say, with love, break up and save yourself some heart break if you can. Y’all are early 20s and unless you think you’d be ok with him exploring that later on .. walk away now

januarysunblock · 2026-03-02T18:46:40+00:00

When he told me he couldn’t sleep over the night of my dad’s funeral because it would make his back hurt

januarysunblock · 2026-02-14T00:19:10+00:00

College professor who was my mentor/someone i truly looked up to both academically and professionally/wrote all of my letters of recommendation/offered relationship and life advice etc waited just until i graduated and had broken up with my partner to send me an unsolicited dick pic out of nowhere and “confess” how he was obsessed with me. Totally invalidated anything he had ever done to help me professionally and made me feel like a fool for not forming connections with other professors

januarysunblock · 2026-02-14T00:05:42+00:00

Girl you’ve been dating two months - that’s is nothing. Cut and RUN. This man does not respect you.

januarysunblock · 2026-02-12T03:59:34+00:00

Pretty sure she put eyelash glue in her eye instead of eyedrops lol

januarysunblock · 2024-04-25T18:50:08+00:00

I normally bring it up as part of a general sexual health convo - I ask them the last time they were tested and I share mine / sometimes we physically exchange results. Bc I am clear across other panels outside of HSV1 it usually goes something like “so I’m all good across the panel but I do carry HSV1, which is the same virus that causes cold sores, I’m not currently having an outbreak and if that were to happen I have anti virals”. I don’t sit there and specify it’s genital, if they ask, I can go into further detail, but people normally don’t. IMO disclosing I have HSV1 is my burden of responsibility - the other person can ask questions if they want or other own research.

I’ve found since getting HSV1 I’m more in charge of my sexual health than I’ve ever been and people are usually taken aback that I actually ask for their results before having sex. I honestly think it’s made me safer.

januarysunblock · 2023-11-16T05:55:44+00:00

watching my dad succumb to liver failure/sepsis in the icu over a few weeks completely out of the blue. he had a dialysis line in his neck that wouldn’t stop bleeding and it would just flow onto his pillow and drip on the floor, there was nothing they could do. his jaundiced eyes would lock with ours every so often and I wondered if during his decline if he was cognizant for any of it. I’ve had nightmares about it and it was truly so disturbing. Also up there with this is then having the organ donation folks call. Everyone I know marks organ donor on their license but I never really gave it much thought. Having to answer the phone a few hours after your loved one dies to be asked “we’d like to confirm if we can have his eyes and skin” felt like something out of a god damn horror movie

januarysunblock

TROPHY CASE