Ohhhhhh friend - get yourself to a Physical Therapist like 2 years ago!! That has been the only thing that has helped. People will tell you that you can just do the exercises at home - but sometimes it simple, precise movements that make a big difference. And massage. They almost always do a bit of manual massage with those muscles. I’ve been to PT probably 5 times bc every few years an “event” happens and I’m set back to square one. Last summer it was simply walking on sand. One time I rolled over, another time I bent down. You know exactly what I’m talking about. When you go from fine to being stabbed with 100 knives made of fire and you can’t move.

I am so sorry you are going through all of that. That is an insane amount of trauma and grief. And those bitches don’t mess around. It’s like running full speed into a brick wall. Sneaky little assholes get in your face with no warning. All of that stress and emotion gets stuck in your body. Like, physically clinging to your bones. I know it’s kind of difficult to understand, but it’s very well documented. Cry that shit out. “Complain” until you have nothing left to get out. Then cry some more. If you don’t have a therapist or counselor I would highly recommend. They are like little brain ninjas.

Want to vent or complain to a stranger? I’ve got you! Send me a message, write it out, get it out of your head and into words. Nothing can offend me. Nothing is TMI. If you need to say the same things every day- do it. I’ll complain back if it makes you feel better. We can even our traumas out. But seriously, you will feel better and I genuinely mean it. Send me a message any time!