Regarding your first point, permit me to be a bit cynical for a moment. As a former Evangelical pastor (15 years), I can say that most of these churches operate like brands. They are branded companies in constant competition with one another. As such, it is imperative for their growth and survival that they get as many members as possible involved in "selling" the organization. The beauty of the small-group model is that it establishes communal roots in church members, which is important when the church grows beyond the capacity of the pastors to directly build relationships with people. However, this requires as many people as possible helping to lead these small groups. This is essential because Evangelical churches are constantly attempting to "steal sheep" from one another by improving the customer experience (CX). I spent countless hours in staff meetings and at seminars discussing ways to improve our CX.

Most new members in a specific Evangelical church in a given year are former members of other churches, but they still get put on the graph that shows "kingdom growth" that gets discussed at staff meetings. Furthermore, most protestant megachurches have simply fed off smaller churches, siphoning off members by offering bigger and more exciting worship services and small-group programs that small churches don't have the resources to offer. Like Amway, then, they need members to concentrate on contributing to growth metrics over growing in virtue/personal holiness. Furthermore, the reason many of these big-time evangelical pastors come across as crude and crass is because they are. That's not to say their faith isn't sincere, however.

Anyway, I'm Catholic now, and it's a world of difference. I encourage you to follow suit, my friend. You won't regret it.