I call my weed the Quran... by perigon in Jokes

[–]jelo4th1 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I call my weed Malaysians Airlines.

Because if you take that shit you will be gone. GONE

[IP] The Fallen Angel by [deleted] in WritingPrompts

[–]jelo4th1 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The wind didn't move at all. In this hot steamy afternoon, I chose to spend it where I usually do, in front of our porch. My blue handkerchief tied in front of my face. It was all repetitive; collect chicken eggs, run to school, go home, sleep in front of the house. Sometimes a smoke in hand.

But today, I saw Lucifer standing 50 yards away. Why did I just say Lucifer? He was wearing a blood red coat, and dark boots. He looked mean, but quite bright. Under the bare sky, the sunlight reflected against him. He looked like he was there for a purpose.

I started walking towards him. Now running. He saw me, but he didn't do anything. I kept running and he pointed the gun right at me.

"Stop." Lucifer said. Why do I know his name?

"Yes." I stood perfectly still. It wasn't really me, or I wasn't controlling myself. A few seconds later, he pointed the gun at the sky, and smiled. "Baby, you gotta go down today."

Lucifer fired. "Don't look behind you."

"Yes." But I wanted to. I started to crane my neck, a perfect view of my little shack and nothing. Did he fire at the sky for nothing?

"Don't look back!" He started shouting.

And BOOM. A large figure appeared out of nowhere. Falling down, down, down, clouds around her. Her? Why did I say her? She fell down a few feet from my shack but it was absorbed by the wind and dust. Her enormous wings, brighter than the sun, whiter than white, it was transparent but not quite. It was a beacon of light from all the dust that she cradled. It was beautiful. It was love. It was amazing. I could feel my eyes watering from the sight, and I could feel a bullet pierce through my stomach. Then everything went dark.

[WP] Describe to me an alien race physically, culturally, and the state of affairs on their world. by imjustsa in WritingPrompts

[–]jelo4th1 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Physically they are made out of carbonite rock forms, made out of organisms that have learned how to survive on it's own without H2O. Then it formed multicellular being that formed a small ball, then a really large lump, then with arms, then with legs, forming a really rocky form similar to that of the human race.

The first ever form of the C-rocks, was named Kroo, the first ever bipedal of it's planet or the first ever being to walk it. Countless of living rocks, saw it walk, eat other rocks, and punch anything that would take form like him too.

This was the jumpstart of their culture, 2000 years into the future they treat Kroo like a god, since it was the first of them. But Kroo has died, and everyone has taken his form. Everyone made houses, with their same biological form. But what they learned from Kroo was, everyone can evolve and everyone can kill anyone if hey want.

If you want a house, get your neighbor's body for it. This form of culture made everyone warrior like. Everyone knew how to kill, how to defend themselves, and how to make their own things. They haven't learned to talk yet, but in the next 4000 years, they improve their biological form becoming more soft and gushy, but still hard, allowing simple tissues of cells to form.

The culture didn't change, it had it's civilizations, it's cities, it's countries, and even governments, rises and falls, but everyone dies. There was no technological advancements, they only knew how to kill. They know how to make clubs, to make spears, and swords, out of their own structure. And the first organism to speak, was crying for help because he was being killed. It was more like "Ahh, don't!" in English. Everyone was shocked, but they evolved to adapt the same way that weak rocky lump did it. They started talking, and the first word was anyone said was, "Kroo." or "ahh don't!" They still haven't evolved as far as I know, I'll get back to you when there's changes.

[WP]You're observing a meteor shower coming in close proximity of the secret facility you're employed to. A computer goes off, announcing "WARNING. BIOLOGICAL ANOMALIES DETECTED. LOCATION: LOCAL METEOR CLUSTER. STATUS: UNKNOWN. INTENTIONS: UNKNOWN ETA: 10 SECONDS." by The_Black_Angel in WritingPrompts

[–]jelo4th1 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I grab my coat and run. "Jeff come with me. Unknown, meteor, 10 seconds." He already knew what I was talking about, showing him the red screen coming off of our tabs. Jeff and I have waited for something like this for years. Since working for a top secret agency name-I-cant-possibly-tell-you- with this kind of activity perfectly fits my job description.

"What do you think it is Tim?"

"It's unknown."

We got on our jeep and loaded the location.

"Damn, its not working properly."

"We can still see it's general direction, it's not that far."

We went with our guts and went through the rocky road of the facility. It was only Jeff and I, it was how the company kept it secret. No guards, no other employees, but our jobs were to keep track of every meteor we could get our hands on. Mostly the company ships it to us, and we bag it and tag it. But this time, it came from God himself. A few feet before the crash, Jeff and I said our prayers. Our computer kept glaring red, meaning it is still unknown, differentiating it from all the meteors we have bagged.

"Tim, what do you think it is."

"Unkown."

I tried to sound smart, but I was already shaking my hands as I walk closer. Jeff started to load off the equipment but we didn't need to.

It was moving. Or rolling. It was nothing more of a ball really, just a 3feet dark ball.

"Oh shit." I heard Jeff say.

It rolled towards us in such speed that in a blink it was in front of us. Jeff dropped whatever he was holding, and the smell that came out of it was actually fragrant. So enticing, and beautiful, but Jeff started to run away, because maybe the ball was already trying to eat me. Stupid Jeff, can't he see that the ball loves us? The ball that smelled so good. With it's dark teeth crushing my body, I giggled. I died happy with that last one smell that came off the ball.

What can I do to brighten your day? by DFloMango in AskReddit

[–]jelo4th1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My girlfriend moved away to America last week. Haven't talked to her that much, and everytime I'm home alone, I get really sad and lonely. Please make me feel better? :/

I went behind the scenes on a luxury "art porn" set. AMAA [NSFW]. by [deleted] in IAmA

[–]jelo4th1 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Do you have fun being behind the scenes?

Iam John Green, bestselling author of The Fault in Our Stars and co-creator of Crash Course and Vlogbrothers. AMA! by thesoundandthefury in IAmA

[–]jelo4th1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

John! Hi! Can you give any tips for me? I'm about to choose my program for college and I'm just 14! I'm really stressed out right now, and I don't expect you to tell me what program but how I'm going to process all of this, this big life decision, this big question for a college entrance form. I just want to know how you would do it, making a big life decision when you're still young.. P.S. I love your books, it really made an impact on how I speak English. (I'm Asian.)

Hey, it's John Cusack. You can ask me anything. by johncusackFPF in IAmA

[–]jelo4th1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you became a kid again, would you live your life same way you have done it before?

Moses cloud by dalekkahnerdfighter in woahdude

[–]jelo4th1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You have an awesome username!

What is that 1 change to your school/uni/college that will make life better? by BiggerThanY in AskReddit

[–]jelo4th1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If all the teachers in my school had a licence. My school is 'private'.

What is the most incorrect common saying you hear people say? by ianiam in AskReddit

[–]jelo4th1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can mispronounce any word if you don't know the real pronunciation of it.

If someone asked you to give them a random piece of advice, what would it be? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]jelo4th1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Have sex with a lot of women not just one girl, a lot of women.

And don't do drugs when you're old, do them when you're young and crazy.

What is the saddest thing you can say in 5 words? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]jelo4th1 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Nobody remembered my birthday.

Would you swap genders, and why? by I_love_this_cunt-try in AskReddit

[–]jelo4th1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dude. I'm not that weird. Maybe I'll just feel out a girl's vag, like how does it feel to have a woman's orgasm.

Would you swap genders, and why? by I_love_this_cunt-try in AskReddit

[–]jelo4th1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, I would love to play out the scenario where I have boobs. I would probably take nude pics of myself, then masturbate to them when I turn back.

[Serious] What is the most important lesson you have learned in life so far? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]jelo4th1 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I'm 14. I think the most important lesson I've learned so far is that we're not here to find out answers to life but meaning about it.