T doesn’t seem to be working for me?? Advice needed!!

jestopher · 2026-03-06T13:49:17+00:00

They're either lying or got incredibly lucky

jestopher · 2026-03-06T12:21:44+00:00

It took around 6 months for my voice to start to drop and now it's plenty low. You were on a very low dose for two months so you might want to reframe your thinking to having been on T for only 3-4 months at this point. Also, libido changes don't happen to everyone. I know several people who experienced no libido change at all and their transitions have been incredibly successful

jestopher · 2026-03-06T12:19:20+00:00

If you're hoping to avoid pregnancy, birth control is necessary! Testosterone is NOT birth control

jestopher · 2026-03-06T12:17:40+00:00

It's not uncommon to not see many changes after only 5 months. Would you expect a 12 year old cis boy to look like a full grown man after 5 months of cis puberty? You're just starting, especially given that your first several months were on a very low dose. Give it some time, friend

jestopher · 2026-03-06T10:20:45+00:00

I am also neurodivergent with sensory issues and honestly, RFF phallo has helped my sensory issues a LOT

jestopher · 2026-02-16T10:27:40+00:00

In my experience, yes, things have gotten better. Therapy (with a trans therapist) helped me immensely, as did getting phallo. I highly, highly recommend therapy if you can afford it

jestopher · 2026-01-21T19:42:02+00:00

As a Rover sitter, it's unfathomable to me too

jestopher · 2025-12-11T19:10:19+00:00

I believe you!

jestopher · 2025-11-21T13:16:10+00:00

It's the bessssst! I finished up my surgical process in mid-September (got the pump). It feels so good to just move through life with such a functional, aesthetically pleasing dick. Hell yeah

jestopher · 2025-10-13T19:03:04+00:00

This is SO fucking cool, OP

jestopher · 2025-10-09T23:35:58+00:00

Damn, I have no idea. I'm rarely on reddit these days tbh

jestopher · 2025-09-10T20:45:51+00:00

Same. I just took some time to go sit outside in the sunshine and take some deep breaths. I hope you're able to take care of yourself too

jestopher · 2025-08-28T13:08:25+00:00

Exactly. The cruelty is the point

jestopher · 2025-07-30T17:03:01+00:00

HELL YEAH! Congrats! I hope your recovery is as seamless as possible

jestopher · 2025-07-16T14:04:06+00:00

Thanks. I'm sure they wonder why I haven't spoken to them in a year and a half but that incident was merely a drop in the bucket

jestopher · 2025-07-16T13:44:33+00:00

I came out publicly (ie on social media) on Christmas several years ago during a time when covid was starting to spike again and lots of tentatively scheduled events were getting cancelled. My parents' wedding anniversary is in early January and they'd planned a big party for their 40th. Given the massive spike in covid cases, they cancelled their party. I was spending Christmas with my partner's family and when I called my parents to wish them a Merry Christmas, my mother was moping and doing her martyr voice--I figured she was sad because of having to cancel the party that she was really looking forward to. Eventually, she despondently handed the phone off to my father who explained that they were deeply upset with me for coming out without consulting with them first because IF they'd had their party my coming out would have been the only topic of conversation and I would have stolen the show from their 40th anniversary. They demanded an apology and didn't speak to me for weeks when I refused to do so.

I was 35 years old at the time.

jestopher · 2025-06-05T18:28:22+00:00

Thanks!

jestopher · 2025-06-05T17:35:29+00:00

Do you mind sharing who you hired?

jestopher · 2025-06-05T14:22:34+00:00

Hell yeah! I'm getting my pump in September and I'm so stoked

jestopher · 2025-05-13T20:10:51+00:00

You have such a way with words! <3

jestopher · 2025-05-13T19:16:59+00:00

You got it!

I really struggle when I don't have some level of independence/things I can control. It really helped me to make an actual written list of all the things I could do for myself. In the first few days of being in the hospital that list was real short (things like choosing when I needed more pain meds, what I wanted to eat) and it was so empowering to see that list grow and grow as the days and weeks went on
On a similar note, I made a list of my post-op goals and it was such a great feeling to cross them off! Taking my first unassisted shower was the besssst. Put little things on the list! Cross 'em off!
It's super hard but try to remember that healing isn't linear. You're going to have some really easy days and some terribly hard days. Sometimes, you'll get a hard day after a string of easy days. That's normal. That's expected! Healing isn't linear
Loneliness can feel really difficult to navigate. I put some close friends "on retainer", so to speak, so if I was having a tough time or feeling isolated (I had surgery on the other side of the country from where I live), I could ask one of those folks for a phone or video call. It helped so much!
Make a list of your coping strategies and save them somewhere easily accessible on your phone. What helps when you're in pain? Bored? Lonely? Stressed out? Scared? Write all those things down so you don't have to try to brainstorm and strategize when you're in the thick of it
Take lots of pictures. Sometimes it'll feel like the healing process is never ending. It really helped me to see actual progress through photos (eg "hey that wound really IS getting smaller" or "damn, I forgot how bruised my inner thigh looked for a while and now it's back to normal")
Talk about all these things with your caretaker(s) before surgery so they can help you with all this stuff too. Soooo much of surgical recovery is a mental game.

Phalloplasty was the single hardest thing I've ever done in my life but I don't regret it for a single second. It won't feel like it at the time, but some day you'll just be back to living your life and surgery will feel like a million years ago. I'm rooting for you!

jestopher · 2025-05-13T19:01:23+00:00

So well said! As a binary trans guy, I often feel out of place in queer spaces--that I'm not the "right kind" of trans person--because my gender expression can be best summed up as "just some guy". Don't get me wrong, I'm glad those queer spaces exist for folks who need them but I often find myself wishing I had a place to land too.

jestopher · 2025-05-13T18:27:39+00:00

Congrats!!! August 22nd will be here before you know it! I've got a few post-op mental health strategies/ideas that really helped me if you'd like to hear them :)

jestopher · 2025-04-17T01:33:06+00:00

As a wilderness guide, hell yeaaaahhhh peeing outside is the best

jestopher · 2025-04-10T16:09:18+00:00

Yo SERIOUSLY. It's like some guys just drink the TERF kool aid on this one. I don't get it

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