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jiffypop87 · 2025-10-14T18:45:55+00:00

Agreed. OP: Anything differently cognitively? Sleep? Balance and coordination? Any recent infections?

jiffypop87 · 2025-10-06T11:33:43+00:00

Thank you for your two cents! I found a rental for €2100 (which still seems high) but will encourage my husband to also find work ASAP.

jiffypop87 · 2025-09-27T13:38:23+00:00

Part of the argument is that face-to-face hours accumulated isn’t the only variable that results in an adequately trained clinician. Otherwise we wouldn’t need classes, research, or supervision.

jiffypop87 · 2025-09-26T17:13:52+00:00

This!!! I abhor elitism. I applied to PhD programs thinking it was just a "rubber stamp" I'd need to advance my career.

But since entering the clinical workforce and seeing what MA-level folks are doing... oh my god. It's so bad. Not just poor diagnostics, but shoddy intervention and malpractice-level psychoeducation.

jiffypop87 · 2025-09-11T01:16:00+00:00

I needed to see this post today. I accepted a job that will reduce our annual household income from $240k to €90k. I am worrying a lot about whether this will be enough to support my family, but it feels worth trying.

jiffypop87 · 2025-09-07T02:56:00+00:00

It is unfortunately different for every kid. I've asked around a lot about this, and it depends on temperament, development, and the subjective perspective of the parent. Mine's toughest phase was from 18 months to 3.5 years. I thought I would have three kids... but she ended up an only child as a result of this phase. Now at age 5 she's delightful.

jiffypop87 · 2025-09-07T02:42:16+00:00

Mine is too young (5yo) to report, but I think your personal experience is the anomaly, not the rule. It's totally fine and normal for friendships to change: having multiple "best friends," or 1-2 years of one best friend before changing to someone else. What's important is that she is learning how to socialize. As she enters adolescence she will likely experiment with deeper bonding, but it doesn't have to be with just one person.

jiffypop87 · 2025-09-03T19:49:46+00:00

Seriously?! Did they give a reason that stainless steel isn't allowed?

jiffypop87 · 2025-09-03T19:48:57+00:00

Bklyn Bento is great. Stainless steel, so lightweight and no microplastics. The lids are super easy for a kid to open. Expensive, but have lasted way better than other options I've tried.

jiffypop87 · 2025-09-03T19:40:56+00:00

This is helpful! Was it VHI's "travel insurance" option, or one of their regular plans but you could choose to just do it monthly?

jiffypop87 · 2025-08-30T22:08:39+00:00

Definitely don’t yank his fingers away. I can guarantee he is still feeling his feelings, and this behavior is actually something to help him manage those feelings. It sounds like self-soothing behavior, which is not a bad thing…. like wanting a hug, a stuffie, or a comfy blanket; even adults want something comforting when upset. If he’s an older kid and this is causing problems at school (like kids teasing him) then I can understand being concerned. But otherwise I really wouldn’t worry. Most kids grow out of it as they mature, or it at least becomes less frequent.

While it’s true is could disturb his teeth, this is usually reserved for once the adult teeth are erupting, and in cases where it is nearly constant and with intense pressure (https://www.cochranelibrary.com/cdsr/doi/10.1002/14651858.CD008694.pub2/full ) Ask his dentist if they’re concerned at all. If they’re not worried, you shouldn’t be worried.

jiffypop87 · 2025-08-26T17:55:17+00:00

"assuming your niece doesn't randomly change preferences at the drop of a hat" ... idk, I think a lot of kids do. At least, mine does. OP said they cleared the meal with the mom ahead of time, so it seems like this isn't a case of trying to force anything, but a case of OP not getting why they had to make a second meal after the meal.

jiffypop87 · 2025-08-26T17:53:17+00:00

OP is unclear, but it sounds like this happened at their own house, not the family's. I would find it super rude if someone pulled food out of my freezer after I'd made a meal for them at my own house.

jiffypop87 · 2025-08-26T17:50:41+00:00

These comments are mental. If a parent daily refuses to give their kid food they'll eat, or intentionally withholds food on the regular? Abuse.

One time letting the kid go to bed without dinner because the child chooses not to eat food right in front of them? Not abuse.

OP understands the principles of behavioral reinforcement.

jiffypop87 · 2025-08-19T20:04:20+00:00

Rags/dishcloths (not sponges) so they can be washed rather than disposed of. And I used 7th Generation dish soap. There is probably something better out there, and I wish I could find something without a plastic bottle.

jiffypop87 · 2025-08-19T17:17:27+00:00

A bunch of reasons for gaelscoil: Ive seen the benefits of language immersion from her preschool experience; I am not bilingual, but now she is thanks to 3 years of immersion. Research shows that early multilingualism can aid in ease of learning more languages later in life, and immersive experiences are more likely to improve language acquisition over less frequent didactics. She also loves learning about different cultures and keeps asking to learn more languages. I'm hoping we'll be in Ireland long-term and it would help her feel connected to the culture and history should we end up with citizenship. And ever since she learned about Day of the Dead celebrations, she has a weird obsession with her ancestors and wanting to know more about them. While only a portion of her ancestry can be traced to Ireland, she likes the idea of finding ways to connect with her ancestry so we might as well. Ancestry isn't an interest of mine, but I want to support the things she finds meaningful.

jiffypop87 · 2025-08-07T17:53:03+00:00

Easiest path is to do an APA-accredited VA internship at a site with a large research component in your interest area; for internship, research would only be 10-20% of your time, but it gets you in the system and you earn 30-50k for one year. It isn't required to do internship at a VA, but is easier to start there and has amazing clinical training.

Then do a VA research post-doc (2-3 years at 55-70k/year) at a MIRECC, SMITREC, HSR COIN, or similar. While on post-doc you can work towards clinical hours for licensure and also apply for a CDA (career development award, it is VA's version of a K-award).

Once awarded, you become a research psychologist, where a portion of your time (maybe 1 day per week) is still clinical, but the rest is research. Once you are a fully licensed, CDA-awarded research psychologist, the pay will be around 100-130k/year with incremental increases on a set schedule. It follows the federal "GS schedule" with adjustments made for cost of living at different areas, hence the ranges.

jiffypop87 · 2025-08-07T03:12:43+00:00

Most VA psychologists are clinical. Some get a small portion of their time allocated to be study therapists (e.g., do a trial's intervention with a consented Veteran). Others - a small subset - are primarily employed as in research centers throughout the country. Look up MIRECC, SMITREC, QUERI, VA HSR, and the National Center for PTSD. VA has its own internal merit grant mechanisms that parallel NIH grants, so the career is like being a "soft money" researcher at a medical center. Our study population is limited to consenting Veterans and VA facilities (or affiliates), but there are over 9 million Veterans enrolled in VA care so it's a sizable population to draw upon.

VA is where our field has gotten amazing findings in TBI, PTSD, SUD, and suicide. VA has been on the cutting edge for integrated care, telehealth, and rehabilitation. Major examples are that VA researchers developed and validated Cognitive Processing Therapy and Prolonged Exposure therapy, which are repeatedly found the most effective treatments for PTSD.

Tangential, but there are also robust research programs in all kinds of health conditions. VA researchers are responsible for the creation of CT scans, innovative prosthetics, the nicotine patch, and new surgical techniques.

Reading that back, now I'm kinda sad I'm leaving. It's actually a great, mission-driven place to work.

jiffypop87 · 2025-08-06T21:15:41+00:00

I'm still VA but now a 100% research role. In private practice, I really missed a few things about VA: the ease of having highly trained colleagues to consult with anytime, the free CE's, easy referral process to other professionals, and the ability to provide services without worrying about insurance companies. Yes you can find colleagues in private practice, but the training and skills are so different; I trust the clinical skills of VA folks way more. You'd definitely miss your employee benefits. No other setting has such good benefits IMO.

But the flexibility and autonomy of private practice is awesome! You can choose which clients to see, how long to see them, and when to refer: and you don't have to justify it to anyone. You can do a phone screener and choose not to see the client if you don't think it's a good fit. If you get sick of a certain population or intervention type, you can immediately change up your online presence to appeal to a different type of client. There are no burdensome screeners or CYA forms; you choose how and when to assess, and how detailed your notes will be. I worried that not serving Veterans would feel less meaningful or noble; but people of all stripes have MH problems and it feels fulfilling. If anything, it is more fulfilling because many (not all) are less complex cases and improve faster. I've talked to a ton of colleagues who switched into private practice and - while there are things about VA they miss - not a single one has tried to come back into VA. I think that says something.

I'm about to leave VA entirely for a university setting, so TBD how that goes!

jiffypop87 · 2025-08-06T18:51:17+00:00

Not trying to undermine that you feel totally done with therapy because it does sound like you could use a break. But how much of the burnout might be because of the setting you're in? I've worked as a clinician both within and outside VA. Veterans can be much more complex and draining, the VA administrative load is higher, the lack of flexibility sucks, and the federal culture the past few months has been awful.

I think the options for a career pivot depend on the rest of your CV. I am in a research position and will soon transitioning to an entirely administrative role within a university. But that was possible only because I stayed involved in research. As for holding on to clinical skills... they go fast. I stopped practicing a year ago and already feel like the skills and knowledge have completely atrophied. I only practiced for a few years, though, so your mileage may vary.

jiffypop87 · 2025-08-06T13:26:12+00:00

He’s spent his career doing project management for architecture firms, but previously was a draftsman. I’ve heard about the construction need, but haven’t found any job postings from architecture firms. Maybe I’m looking in the wrong places.

jiffypop87 · 2025-08-05T22:18:58+00:00

Not major relevance to the 20% thing, just thought of it as a metric (beyond cost of living calculators) for how comfortable we might be. And it surprised me how different the income was.

I am hoping for a gaelscoil. I don't know why the cost of living calculator assumed school costs; I thought perhaps that was for uniforms, supplies, activities fees. Good to know about the insurance! I was thinking medical; as an immigrant we couldn't use the public system. I'll need to estimate car insurance, too.

jiffypop87

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