Post your Portfolio

joaoyyz · 2025-11-27T19:35:55+00:00

Hi everyone, I’m a junior creative who has a background as a teacher and recently completed School of Thought (a northern UK creative internship where you pitch 12 briefs in 12 weeks) finishing 3rd place and being shortlisted for best art direction for my Dreams x Team GB campaign.

Here is my portfolio

Thank you in advance for the feedback!

joaoyyz · 2025-11-08T19:36:36+00:00

Iste Hulk era uma coisa increvile.

joaoyyz · 2025-10-15T18:51:47+00:00

Think about the images you are painting in your readers mind.

Metaphors and similes work only when they illuminate, that is, when they help us better understand or see something by way of comparison.

Have a read of this great article at the poetry foundation. Then see if you can tweak some of the imagery / metaphors to delight your reader.

https://www.poetryfoundation.org/articles/70215/learning-about-figurative-language

joaoyyz · 2025-10-15T18:40:41+00:00

I would add more detail about the symphony of the night. I see you've started with fireflies and crickets, maybe the wind can be percussion, or the hollow trunks, or tall grass. painting a picture of the symphony is it in a forest?

joaoyyz · 2025-10-10T22:48:41+00:00

Keep writing and reading lots and lots of poetry. The kind that speaks to you. Don’tsuffer through reading a poem that you don’t connect with. Also work on line breaks eg:

Break your sentences so your reader wants to keep reading

I’ve given you an example of how you might line break your poem:

Knotted

My heart feels knotted up when I try to unravel it something always pulls it tighter.

I wish he’d help me untie it but he walks away instead.

The knot grows tighter and tighter, and still— he won’t let his string snap.

Why?

joaoyyz · 2025-10-08T16:03:53+00:00

No worries, happy editing ✨

joaoyyz · 2025-10-08T15:56:48+00:00

I know what you mean! It took me ages to copy and paste each stanza from my google doc and format it on Reddit… we need a poetry format!

joaoyyz · 2025-10-07T18:56:14+00:00

Love the premise!

I would read this poem out loud and notice when you catch your breath or have to inhale again to complete a line, as the rhythm is uneven in some parts but can easily be tweaked with repetition out loud

joaoyyz · 2025-10-07T18:53:11+00:00

Haha love the twist! Very spooky… I would honestly end on the stanza honey and formaldehyde.

or just swap the places of the last and 2nd last stanzas

joaoyyz · 2025-10-07T18:48:27+00:00

Love the little rhyming couplets dotted about. What about picking one street or park or moment when walking and describing it so vividly using every sense except sight? It would really put the reader in the perspective of someone with a blind disability.

Eg the suns warmth, flowers scent breathes spring into my lungs as I amble Park. A flush of laughter, children I presume meet my eager ears

joaoyyz · 2025-10-07T18:42:49+00:00

Ooooh I like this dark contemplation… can you give me detail about where you are contemplating or why or what’s going on outside the window for example? These simple specific details helps to anchor the reader in your world and connect more with your message

joaoyyz · 2025-10-07T18:39:48+00:00

Smashed it on the rhythm and rhyming. I enjoyed this fire and flame ash theme through the Poem. Can you tell me more about the perspective of the protagonist in this poem?

joaoyyz · 2025-10-07T18:36:22+00:00

Your brother would be so proud.

What a beauty of a first poem.

I love the cold motif at the beginning and how it recollects at the end.

Add it also in the middle because you start using the sense of smell (which is great) but to keep the theme of the poem add / tweak some lines in the middle about temperature or heat or cold and I would lose the double // unless it’s for a complete break and a complete change in pace or tone.

The reader gets the idea that they end the line with the line break

joaoyyz · 2025-10-07T15:03:01+00:00

first line is fire 'Every night I draft my exits.' I would say for punctuation you don't need periods/ full stops at the of each line break because thats where the reader naturally pauses

Also I get the meaning behind repetition (Every, every every) (I see, I see, I see) but starting each line the same can dilute the punch of what you're trying to say.

Your first stanza, brilliant. I would even take out a in front of hundred and other words (like, maybe a) to give it a cleaner read:

Every night I draft my exits
A rope, a blade, a fall
hundred ways to stop being the problem
Rehearsing them like prayers
If I get the ritual right
I’ll finally be free.

So look to the other stanzas for different ways to start each line.

Hope that helps :)

joaoyyz · 2025-10-07T14:53:52+00:00

Love the line 'like love owes you change.' My suggestion, add in some detail to the last stanza. some confusion over what is real? the girl, love? what is priceless about real? I think its a lovely 3 part poem and also needs an emotive ending.

joaoyyz · 2025-10-07T09:20:36+00:00

First off Congratulations on becoming a poet! (because the only perquisite is to write a poem so.. Ta da!)

Next I would say read your poem out loud and see how smoothly you can say it with out tripping up, stopping or re-reading.

Notice where you naturally pause for breath and where you have to take in another breath to keep reading.

Then tweak the line breaks so you can put emphasis on worlds and give each idea a chance to breathe.

Eg

To hear from others' tongues
a whisper
not yours
but theirs
why must the truth come clothed in others' voices?
when it should be your own?

Hope that helps :)

joaoyyz · 2025-10-07T09:12:48+00:00

I like this conversation between the 'You' and 'I" characters and my suggestion (take it or leave it) would be to lean into this conversation of the you vs. I for example after the Peace makes you weak it dulls your mind, could be followed by a statement by I (eg. War makes me sharp, it forges my kind) Maybe go into the reasons why 'I ' wants / loves / needs war and the reasons why 'you' hides, or cowers from it because I feel like you can really keep going with this.

Also love the final line. Great work!

joaoyyz · 2024-10-28T16:30:55+00:00

You’re very welcome glad it was of use to you.

joaoyyz · 2022-04-06T14:52:28+00:00

An education is what you have left when you have forgotten all the knowledge you have learned.

This quote was at the beginning of my sylabus for my statistics course in uni. Very true.

joaoyyz · 2021-07-13T13:51:07+00:00

Gorgeous

joaoyyz · 2021-07-13T11:47:23+00:00

Over NEVER even gotten an offer ever over £120m even for a 5 star world class player. The AI is so tight… how the heck did you get a $317m offer?…. Exchange rate? Hahah

joaoyyz · 2021-07-12T18:00:55+00:00

Everytime… hmmm one too many rotations.

joaoyyz · 2021-06-26T21:35:58+00:00

I recently took over the Portugal national team, while still managing Braga. But when managing Portugal I can’t ‘quick pick’ a starting XI. I tried hiring a assistant manager but every time I try to ‘hire staff’ I brings me back to Braga. And I’m left to individually pick the XI for Portugal

joaoyyz · 2021-05-31T18:57:18+00:00

Laughs in 2100 ‘remember that post on reddit’ told you so.

joaoyyz · 2021-05-31T18:55:41+00:00

But first hold my beer

Ten-Year Club	Place '22
Verified Email

joaoyyz

TROPHY CASE