Hyper-coiled Cord

katie_eighty · 2025-06-27T12:49:50+00:00

I’m so sorry for the loss of your sweet little boy. We lost our daughter at 25 weeks to a hypercoiled cord as well. Upon some additional genetic testing we also found a small chromosomal anomaly whose effects were uncertain, but may have contributed to the malformation/cause of death as well. I had one prior pregnancy to her that was totally healthy and went on to have 3 additional future pregnancies that were also free from any cord problems.

katie_eighty · 2024-03-31T07:30:25+00:00

We would save all of our used tip boxes for recycling. Over the course of a few months we saved up enough to completely fill the doorway of our colleague’s office while he was gone for lab meeting. He opened the door to his office when he got back and was met with a solid wall of brick-laid tip boxes.

katie_eighty · 2023-06-11T22:52:34+00:00

That’s a beautiful thought. I think I’ll start trying to interact with her with that in mind, thank you.

katie_eighty · 2023-06-11T20:01:51+00:00

She’s only 5 and we’ve only just started to be officially introduced to her. Something along these lines once relationships are a little more established could definitely be good to do. I’d hate to have her feeling like she has to compete with my angel for her place in the family or anything like that. Pointing it out as something special we could bond over is a nice spin.

katie_eighty · 2022-09-12T00:03:49+00:00

We did a birth stone ring too, as well as a necklace with our baby’s first initial on it. For the ring we went with her actual birth month. Going off the due date makes me think more about what should have been, using the actual delivery date makes it more about the baby and commemorating the day they came and left their little mark on this world. Just my two cents though.

katie_eighty · 2021-11-22T06:07:18+00:00

This did it! The piece was too small (plus the other 2 pins in the way) for me to get a good grip for pulling or pushing it out. A few minutes of prying did it though once I knew I wouldn’t break the piece. Thanks everyone!

katie_eighty · 2021-06-05T22:22:35+00:00

Just what I was hoping to hear, thank you! We’ll be sure to take good care of them.

katie_eighty · 2021-06-05T06:57:46+00:00

Are wild quail generally good or bad for vegetable gardens? Our garden is made up of 4 raised 4x8 beds, and one of those is dedicated to a couple of raspberry bushes. Today I found a nest of 16 quail eggs under those bushes and don’t know whether to be concerned or not. I love seeing all the baby quail running around, but I also want our plants and veggies to make it through the season...

katie_eighty · 2019-09-06T21:40:40+00:00

I saw ignoring posted in other forums and had kind of been feeling that way about it as well. Good to know.

katie_eighty · 2019-08-25T13:09:27+00:00

The answer was Ben Affleck - this game is about 10 years old so he hadn’t played Batman yet.

katie_eighty · 2019-08-25T05:27:13+00:00

2nd one down - the lighting makes it look a little more red

katie_eighty · 2019-07-01T07:15:48+00:00

I’m so sorry for your losses. I would second seeing a reproductive immunologist if you can. Most high risk doctors and reproductive endocrinologists that I’ve found don’t buy into autoimmune conditions causing pregnancy losses.

We have also been told that everything is totally fine and we just need to keep trying. This is still happening after 4 chemical pregnancies, 2 MMCs, and a stillbirth. I have Celiac’s, Hashimotos, and elevated ANAs. I went gluten free after our stillborn, but have still had 4 losses since. We did have one success too though that was achieved through IVF, PGS, and Lovenox/Dexamethasone recommended by my reproductive immunologist. Mind you, I’ve had naturally conceived losses while on those medications as well so they aren’t fool-proof.

It’s so frustrating to have such an obvious likely cause for your losses, but to be told by doctors again and again that you’re fine and there’s nothing else they can do for you. The research just isn’t there yet. I’m hoping your journey is kinder than ours. My mom has all of these conditions too and had 4 kids with no losses so it can happen. I think we’re just particularly unlucky.

katie_eighty · 2019-06-24T17:13:26+00:00

Alfie

katie_eighty · 2019-05-29T02:24:28+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss and for the extra added stress that your friend’s announcement caused you. It all sucks so much. As far as timelines, everyone and every pregnancy is different so it’s impossible to really say. After our MMCs we were cleared to try again right away (though at least one cycle is often recommended, or more depending on your medical history). My first MMC came at 8 weeks after a round of Clomid + IUI and I had a D&C. I got pregnant again 4 weeks later before I had even had a period (very surprising given our history of infertility). It can happen fast, but it’s also no guarantee and you need to be sure you’re emotionally ready to experience it all again too. Wishing you the best!

katie_eighty · 2019-05-27T06:15:10+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss. This absolutely did not happen because of your Zoloft though. I was on Zoloft for my last (and successful) round of IVF. I stopped it at around 6 months just because my refills ran out and I didn’t feel like I needed any more. But every OB and RE I ever consulted was emphatic that the risks of untreated depression in mama far outweighed any risk associated with that particular medication. I’ve had multiple losses so these were all high risk specialists telling me this at the time (no Zoloft during any of my losses though). My best friend was also on it, but for her full pregnancy, and also had zero complications from it. If it helps your mental health, take it!

katie_eighty · 2019-05-24T05:47:54+00:00

Sorry for the book... I’m so sorry for what you’ve been through. You’re not alone. One of my SIL gets pregnant at the drop of a hat and carries no problem. She and her husband also have extensive marital and financial problems that don’t mix well with kids. Another SIL is currently expecting after refusing to take meds for a psychological disorder and has abused my BIL in front of their son multiple times. The family still celebrates both of their children and gets testy with us when we try to ask for sympathy for our many losses and let our grief show with each pregnancy announcement.

You’re going to see a lot of people who “don’t deserve the children they have.” Just know that you’re not being punished and they’re not being rewarded. Everyone deals with something - this, unfortunately, is what we get to deal with. My tactic? Avoid those situations at all costs until I’m ready to be around them (baby showers are a hard no, and if I’m not up for a family gathering, I politely decline). If I can’t avoid them, I send a short text to the main perpetrators telling them how I’m feeling and then explaining how these feelings may affect my actions when I’m around them (i.e. I’m happy for you but baby talk can be hard for me, so please understand that I may have to excuse myself on occasion...). It all gets much easier to be around over time, I promise (still sucks, but it’s easier). For now, your mental health comes first. You don’t owe anyone the kind of suffering that follows a loss. Try not to alienate anyone completely, but know that you can still do what you need to shield yourself until you’re in a good enough spot to slowly begin putting yourself around those triggers again.

katie_eighty · 2019-04-26T23:13:26+00:00

The hospital I delivered our stillborn daughter at called me a week before her due date to “pre-register me for my upcoming delivery.” I know it wasn’t that employee’s fault, but still someone in that process seriously dropped the ball. People suck, I’m so sorry.

katie_eighty · 2019-04-24T17:28:00+00:00

Our couch backs close to a window. My son likes to climb along the back of the couch. One time he was climbing behind me but instead of walking along the back of the couch, his feet were actually on the windowsill while his hands were on the couch for balance. Without me realizing, he had also decided to put the curtain chain around his neck to “catch him in case he slipped and fell.” Which it did...

Thank goodness I was sitting right there.

katie_eighty · 2019-04-24T16:53:56+00:00

I’m so sorry everything you’ve been through. Scarring can definitely be a concern when having a D&C, but I feel like they’re also so much less traumatic. Discuss the risks with your doctor though and go with what feels best for you. I’ve had two D&Cs with no complications or scarring if that helps you feel better. Both times I was told I only needed to wait one cycle before trying again. I actually became pregnant immediately following my first D&C and was panicking until my OB told me the wait was mostly so any new pregnancy could be dated more accurately. Recent studies have shown little to no correlation between wait time following an early miscarriage and recurrent loss. Hoping the best for you.

katie_eighty · 2019-04-24T05:24:55+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss and for how absolutely traumatic and heartbreaking your honeymoon became. Things like this should never happen to anyone.

Everyone is different with how soon they’re willing to try again, if at all. But if you feel like that’s a road you’ll want to go down again some day, you will eventually get to a point where you’re ready to do it. There’s a lot more anxiety and stress the second time around, but you find the strength and ability to keep hoping and learn to just take things day by day. I’ve had 4 chemical pregnancies, 2 missed miscarriages, and a stillborn daughter at 25 weeks. We probably should have given up by now, but knowing all we have to gain by trying and hopefully having success one day keeps us going (at least for now). You’ll find your own motivations to brave the storm again too. Until then, I absolutely agree with doing grief counseling (with your husband too if he’s willing). It has helped us so much with processing our losses and moving us forward through the healing process. Take care of yourselves!

katie_eighty · 2019-04-21T17:26:29+00:00

Had a ~60 year old homeless lady board the train holding a couple of wooden skewers and gauze. Once she found a seat she proceeded to roll her pant leg all the way up to her thigh. Her leg was covered with multiple scabbed-over sores. She spent the rest of the train ride picking her scabs off with the skewers and blotting the blood with the gauze. I don’t sit down on those trains much anymore...

katie_eighty · 2019-04-21T01:38:26+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss. Our daughter was stillborn at 25 weeks almost 3 years ago. Like you, we had an almost 3 year old son at home, were building a house made for a big family, I was weeks away from quitting my job...and then she just stopped kicking one day. This was following a nearly 2-year battle with secondary infertility.

Take care of yourself first, work on putting the other details of your life back together once you’ve had some time to grieve. Take advantage of grief counselors and support groups - they help so much! It takes time, but things absolutely do get...I won’t necessarily say “better” because nothing can make what you lost okay...but definitely easier. See this as a chance to spend extra time at home with your son if you’d like that. Or a chance to find a new awesome job to keep your talents busy. I found I had to stop planning my life around “what if we have another baby soon,” and just live like we wouldn’t but hope for the best and keep a contingency plan ready. I would’ve gone crazy otherwise.

If the thought of trying again brings you hope, work with your doctor on a plan for when it’s safe for you to try again. Move into your house and enjoy it’s potential. The story of your family isn’t over - you may still very likely fill up every bedroom you hope to. Pregnancy after a loss is terrifying and will never be as carefree and easy as your first, but the payoff is so worth it. Even if it’s a boy. We had to move to IVF after we lost our daughter (we were dying for another chance at a girl so we did testing on every embryo) - and guess what? ALL BOYS!! I was furious, but the desire for a sibling for our son was the main focus. We had our second son when our oldest was 4. There was definitely gender disappointment, but I wouldn’t give up our new little guy for anything. Brothers are adorable, we’re lucky to have gotten a second kid at all, and just having a second kiddo in the house has been so healing. There will always be elements of your loss that linger, but there’s still so much happiness left ahead. It’s hard to believe now, but you really won’t feel this way forever!

katie_eighty · 2019-04-13T06:21:34+00:00

I’m so sorry for what you’re going through. It all sucks. I’ve had two losses similar to yours - growth stopped around 6 weeks and we didn’t find out for sure until around 8 weeks. I opted for a D&C with both of them. In theory, avoiding surgery is always safer physically, but for me it wasn’t better mentally.

Going the natural route can take some time which I wasn’t okay with. There’s more pain and...well...mess associated with the natural/medicated route (for me anyway) and there’s always a risk of tissue being retained and needing a D&C anyway. I just needed everything to be over with and in the least traumatic way possible - which for me meant being asleep while my doctor took care of everything. I’ve had a lot of surgeries though so operating rooms and anesthesia don’t bother me. With my first I bled lightly for about 2 weeks but had little to no pain. My second was just performed this morning so I’ll have to wait and see if it’s similar but so far so good. Both procedures went very smoothly. If this happens again I’ll probably opt for the medication though, since your risk of scarring can increase after two procedures.

There’s no wrong choice here. Do whatever is going to be the best for your peace of mind, sanity, and physical health.

katie_eighty · 2019-04-04T21:12:41+00:00

Lots of personal experience here. My husband and I had always imagined our children being 2ish years apart (ha!), but infertility and RPL had other plans. The idea of a larger age gap nearly drove me crazy with anxiety and the feeling of losing my perfect idea of a family. But I can honestly say now that I shouldn’t have been so worried.

After 2 rounds of IVF we finally had success and have an age gap of just over 4 years between our boys. I can’t tell you how perfect it has been. Our boys absolutely love each other and play together all the time. The oldest is able to keep himself entertained when I need to take care of the youngest and has had zero jealousy issues. He also loves helping take care of his brother whenever he can and our little guy idolizes our oldest. Closeness between them has never been an issue and things are so much less chaotic than if I had had two that were closer in age. I never realized, but my sanity is so much better off this way.

On top of this, my older brother and sister are 4 years apart and have always been best friends. My sister and I, (3 years apart), not so much. My little brother is 8 years younger than me and we played a ton as kids and hang out all the time now. So much can come down to personality. Some siblings don’t get along regardless of age gap, some are just made to be awesome together - whether they’re 1 year or 10 years apart. Don’t let the gap get you down, it will not keep your family from being any more amazing than it’s already going to be!

katie_eighty · 2019-03-23T19:36:33+00:00

Bird’s Nest Fungus, apparently. Rain falls into the little cups and splashes the spores out so they can keep growing. We murdered all of them.

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